Comments | subtle_guns: Things I've never said

subtle_guns

Things I've never said

Mar 25, 2006 11:39

WAR JOURNAL ENTRY
SATURDAY, MARCH 25TH, 2006I'm a private man with my emotions, but I'm going to do this virus meme ( Read more... )

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murdock_matt March 26 2006, 01:52:12 UTC

Thank you, Frank.

subtle_guns March 26 2006, 02:08:25 UTC

For what?

I'd propose dividing up the city, but neither of us is fond of being fenced in.

murdock_matt March 26 2006, 02:09:21 UTC

I'm one of two on this list, if I'm not mistaken. Either one of them are...they're well spoken, and I'd be honored to be either one.

subtle_guns March 26 2006, 02:11:12 UTC

You're right. You're #2.

Never thought I'd hear you thank me for promising another round of fisticuffs.

May I ask you something?

murdock_matt March 26 2006, 02:14:48 UTC

Sure.

subtle_guns March 26 2006, 02:28:13 UTC

Do you still love her?

murdock_matt March 26 2006, 02:31:05 UTC

...honest answer?

I don't know. I'd like to be able to give you a clear answer to that, but we were robbed of what we had so soon that, perhaps, it colors things for the both of us.

subtle_guns March 26 2006, 02:43:25 UTC

Strip away the color and look, Matt. Does it bother you?

murdock_matt March 26 2006, 02:45:59 UTC

...you mean, you and her?

subtle_guns March 26 2006, 02:53:12 UTC

Yes.

Some love never dies. You know that.

murdock_matt March 26 2006, 03:23:53 UTC

I don't want it to bother me. But yes, it does.

subtle_guns March 26 2006, 03:45:40 UTC

We often don't want to feel emotions that we are inconvenient. Love, rage, grief and jealousy. One of the lessons I've learned - a hard won lesson - is that expending energy on manipulating your own emotions is pointless. That may surprise you, coming from me.

There is nothing wrong in loving someone. Maria died over thirty years ago and nothing could ever replace her. It's easier for me, because I knew right away that it was pointless to try and replace her, even if I were so inclined. I'm not inclined.

It's never easy to love someone when they've hurt you. It's also pointless to convince yourself that you don't.

I have more to say.

murdock_matt March 26 2006, 03:58:04 UTC

Speak your peace.

subtle_guns March 26 2006, 04:04:41 UTC

I think you get in your own way.

murdock_matt March 26 2006, 17:22:52 UTC

...

Howso?

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