If ever there were a time..
I think that most of my days are spent wondering if I'm going to be able to make it through the day, and on until tomorrow. Not because I'm weak, but because I worry about everything.
I can't seem to satisfy the people around me, they all seem to still have a grudge against me because I'm "always" right. (I say " " because, I don't speak or argue, unless I'm right, no point to fighting if you're wrong, right? ) So I figure the less I say to people the bigger the hint will be that I don't want them around.
No one really understands what Mom's go through, especially me.
I wake up when Ava wakes up ... 7, 8, 9, it all depends on how much sleep she got the night before. I wake up at 7, diaper, clothe, and feed her, eat cereal for myself, and sometimes I make coffee, sometimes I go straight for the diet Mt.Dew, most days I'm playing with her, and watching cartoons until 10 or 11, depends, and then she usually naps, in between there 7 and 10(11) I am fighting to stay awake, so I clean or try to figure out things to do to keep me occupied, when she plays alone. Once she takes a nap I clean the house, ENTIRELY, and then if I'm lucky I get to shower, if she wakes up before I get to shower, I shower later in the evening, or completely wait until the next day (in hopes it goes well). When she wakes up from her nap, I get her lunch together, feed her, clean her off, clean off anything she touched in the process, and put the dishes up, I eat while she eats @ her little table, I always have a LEAST 4 dirty (poop) diapers to change from 7am-2pm... It's exhausting smelling shit all day. After she eats we play until about 3 or 4 or 5 depends on how late Josh is working, and then she sometimes takes another nap, again if I'm lucky and usually sleeps from about 4-5:30 or 3:4:30 it honestly depends, and then while she's asleep I start making dinner, and then Josh gets home, and I have to either finish dinner and make dinner for Ava, or just finish dinner while she's awake or while she's asleep, it depends. I then eat, with my family, and more often then not I try to sit down for at least an hour, which is usually from 6:30-7 until 8 or so.. I watch Jeopardy and Wheel of Fortune as often as I can.. that's 1 hour, for myself. Then after all of that, Ava usually goes to bed around 8 or 9 and then I have to clean the house again... do the dishes, read my books for class, and by 10-11-12 I'm in bed, if Ava doesn't wake up and want to play more..
I love my life, but I'm exhausted.
I can't seem to satisfy the people around me, they all seem to still have a grudge against me because I'm "always" right. (I say " " because, I don't speak or argue, unless I'm right, no point to fighting if you're wrong, right? ) So I figure the less I say to people the bigger the hint will be that I don't want them around.
No one really understands what Mom's go through, especially me.
I wake up when Ava wakes up ... 7, 8, 9, it all depends on how much sleep she got the night before. I wake up at 7, diaper, clothe, and feed her, eat cereal for myself, and sometimes I make coffee, sometimes I go straight for the diet Mt.Dew, most days I'm playing with her, and watching cartoons until 10 or 11, depends, and then she usually naps, in between there 7 and 10(11) I am fighting to stay awake, so I clean or try to figure out things to do to keep me occupied, when she plays alone. Once she takes a nap I clean the house, ENTIRELY, and then if I'm lucky I get to shower, if she wakes up before I get to shower, I shower later in the evening, or completely wait until the next day (in hopes it goes well). When she wakes up from her nap, I get her lunch together, feed her, clean her off, clean off anything she touched in the process, and put the dishes up, I eat while she eats @ her little table, I always have a LEAST 4 dirty (poop) diapers to change from 7am-2pm... It's exhausting smelling shit all day. After she eats we play until about 3 or 4 or 5 depends on how late Josh is working, and then she sometimes takes another nap, again if I'm lucky and usually sleeps from about 4-5:30 or 3:4:30 it honestly depends, and then while she's asleep I start making dinner, and then Josh gets home, and I have to either finish dinner and make dinner for Ava, or just finish dinner while she's awake or while she's asleep, it depends. I then eat, with my family, and more often then not I try to sit down for at least an hour, which is usually from 6:30-7 until 8 or so.. I watch Jeopardy and Wheel of Fortune as often as I can.. that's 1 hour, for myself. Then after all of that, Ava usually goes to bed around 8 or 9 and then I have to clean the house again... do the dishes, read my books for class, and by 10-11-12 I'm in bed, if Ava doesn't wake up and want to play more..
I love my life, but I'm exhausted.