(no subject)
why is it that we relate the heart to love. why do we assume that love is the most importent aspect of our live pumping life force through our being like the heart in our chest. or is it, like our heart, love is a fragel thing that must be taken care of and kept healthy. or is it that we cant live without love like we would die whithout our heart pumping blood through all of our vains. and why is it that you can love someone so much and they could care less about you. why do i care.why am i even writing this. why dont i just shut my mouth and smile and go on with life and pretent like im happy like i always do. why dont i just be a kid. why dont i just go out on the weekends and have fun. why dont i just go up to a girl and tell her shes hot and walk away not careing what she thinks of me. why do i have to pretend to be happy. why do i have to change moods and personalitys depending on who im talking to. the answers to all these questions and more is i dont. but despite knowing i shouldt i do anyway. and i know why. it is mt desperate attepmt to make everyone like me. to make sure noone thinks ill of me. i try to help everyone get what they want but i dont stand up and take what i want. and that above all is what dicusts me about myself.i guess what im sayong is that through making everyone love me im making me hate myself