(no subject)
Is it just January, or is it just me? I always find myself re-evaluating around this time of year.. This year, i'm not liking what I'm finding. I'm out of shape, unhealthy emotionally and physically, and in desperate need of some change.
I need to change my eating habits, my lifestyle.. and who my day to day friends are.
I need to surround myself with people who truly care about me rather than leech off of me. I willingly play the doormat to other people's happiness, when is it my turn? And why do I do this to myself? I watch people walk away, or blantantly not care.. and I do nothing to stop it.. Why is caring a trait that people walk all over? Must I be a bitch to be recognised in my own right? I don't want to be, it's not who I am.. But I always seem to get left in the dust for people who aren't as genuine.. Do I scare people? Or is just that I do this? I over analyse.
Anyways, moving is in the cards again. I can't stay here, I love those few of you who are amazing, and the rest.. you're good in your hearts somewhere, but superficial and self absorbed. I'm tired of anything I need to feel is important being dismissed in the wake of your own trauma.
I need to get in shape too, I'm tired of being fat.. I know I'm overweight, and not only is it not healthy for me, it's not good for my emotional health.. I'm not cute! I'm a person.. I have intelligent thoughts, and I am beautiful.. you just have to find me.. Please don't leave me in the dust for some girl who's 'hot' but shallow. Do you know what that does to me? I will become who I am supposed to.. I will persevere.. and find my niche.. And one day you will all realise what you gave up.
I need to change my eating habits, my lifestyle.. and who my day to day friends are.
I need to surround myself with people who truly care about me rather than leech off of me. I willingly play the doormat to other people's happiness, when is it my turn? And why do I do this to myself? I watch people walk away, or blantantly not care.. and I do nothing to stop it.. Why is caring a trait that people walk all over? Must I be a bitch to be recognised in my own right? I don't want to be, it's not who I am.. But I always seem to get left in the dust for people who aren't as genuine.. Do I scare people? Or is just that I do this? I over analyse.
Anyways, moving is in the cards again. I can't stay here, I love those few of you who are amazing, and the rest.. you're good in your hearts somewhere, but superficial and self absorbed. I'm tired of anything I need to feel is important being dismissed in the wake of your own trauma.
I need to get in shape too, I'm tired of being fat.. I know I'm overweight, and not only is it not healthy for me, it's not good for my emotional health.. I'm not cute! I'm a person.. I have intelligent thoughts, and I am beautiful.. you just have to find me.. Please don't leave me in the dust for some girl who's 'hot' but shallow. Do you know what that does to me? I will become who I am supposed to.. I will persevere.. and find my niche.. And one day you will all realise what you gave up.