The Motions
TV shows rarely make me cry. There are a few exceptions (the last episode of "The Paper Chase" on Showtime, the M*A*S*H episode where Col. Henry Blake died). I really didn't expect to tear up watching "Locked Up Abroad".
"Locked Up Abroad" (on National Geographic Channel) is my guilty pleasure.
By my estimate, about 90% of the episodes consist of people recounting how they had tried to beat the odds (or the system) by smuggling drugs from one country to another. Of course, they always get caught -- it wouldn't be very entertaining if they didn't -- and are jailed for various periods of time. (One woman was still in prison when the episode was filmed.) I'm interested in their stories, partly to see what life in other countries is like (having only travelled outside the US to Mexico and Canada). But it's also fun to count how many opportunities the person had, leading up to their arrest, to give themselves a reality check: "What am I thinking? This will never work. I'm going home." (I usually yell variations of this at the TV during the show.) Of course, hindsight is 20/20. But they all are changed by their experience, and usually turn their lives around for the better.
However, the other 10% of the stories are the true gems. People who are in other countries for legitimate purposes -- for business or vacation, or while travelling the world -- and for whatever reason end up being detained by terrorists or gangs or paramilitary groups. How they deal with their situation, and how they survive, absolutely fascinates me.
This was the case in "Locked Up Abroad - Panama", which aired this week.
Mark Wedeven was born in Columbia, and at two months of age was adopted by a US couple, and moved to the States. In his early 20s he decided to take a personal journey back to Columbia, to "complete the circle". He decided not to just fly to Bogota, like most of us would have done. He decided to travel by land, backpacking and hitching rides. But "the road" only goes so far -- it dead ends in Panama, in a place called the Darien Gap. It's 100 miles of jungle between Panama and Columbia, with narrow trails mostly used by drug traffickers and guerillas. It was the latter group that he encountered on his trip. I won't give all the details -- you can watch it on NatGeo or their website. But while Mark was recounting his story, I realized this was a very special young man.
I'm usually pretty hard on GenX-ers. A lot of them (some, NOT ALL) are unmotivated, even lazy, and they seem to think the world owes them something.
Not Mark.
He struck me as being very insightful about his life, his desires, his emotions, and his... soul, for lack of a better word. He is genuinely moved by his experience and the experiences of the others involved in the story (even his captors). When he is finally released and taken to the US Embassy in Bogota, a nurse asks him, "Are you ok?" And after all the days of being forced to march through the jungle at gunpoint, he finally breaks down and weeps. He admits this on camera, unashamed. He questions his life, and how it affected the people he encountered. And he seems to reach a peace about the experience.
At this point in most episodes, they usually show the person in their current life, with their family or friends, and how they have adjusted after their experience.
But on this episode, the screen went to black, and a message stated that in June 2010, Mark Wedeven was killed in an avalance while climbing Mt. Rainier. The episode was dedicated to his memory.
I was shocked. Here was a young man who had a true spirit of adventure, as well as a very promising future. I believe he could have changed the world, in his own way. I went on the internet to learn more about him.
I was bowled over by what I found out.
He was a carpenter, activist, and father. He taught English as a Second Language to immigrants and volunteered at a homeless shelter.
He first climbed Mt. Rainier when he was 13. Thirteen.
He didn't even own a TV. He and his 5-year old son would check out books from the library. They would go camping and hiking together.
He once outran an avalanche. He even told his mom, "If I die on the mountain, it's ok." Talk about insight.
And he told his mother recently that he was a Christian.
He was 29.
I was crying as I read the accounts of his life, and his death. It's so sad when a young person dies, but especially such an intelligent, caring, passionate young man.
I started to think about my life. Lately, my life has pretty much been... an existence. I get up, go to work, come home, watch tv, go to bed, repeat. I sometimes go to church on Sundays, but rarely go to the social gatherings anymore. My only other connection with the outside world is through the computer or The New Yorker.
That's a "life"?
Mark did more in his 29 years than I've done in 51.
Admittedly, it's been a tough year. Losing Dad has rocked my world. I'm now an orphan. I have no "home". That's the kind of thing that changes you. I look at my future, and see ... nothing. Earlier this year, I considered ending it all.
So, what is my purpose? Why am I here?
I think of the song that played on KSBJ this afternoon.
It's by a singer/songwriter named Matthew West who underwent surgery on his vocal cord:
I don’t wanna go through the motions
I don’t wanna go one more day
Without Your all consuming passion inside of me
I don’t wanna spend my whole life asking
What if I had given everything?
Instead of going through the motions
Maybe Mark Wedeven didn't die in vain.
Maybe, in his death, there's a message for me about my life.
"Locked Up Abroad" (on National Geographic Channel) is my guilty pleasure.
By my estimate, about 90% of the episodes consist of people recounting how they had tried to beat the odds (or the system) by smuggling drugs from one country to another. Of course, they always get caught -- it wouldn't be very entertaining if they didn't -- and are jailed for various periods of time. (One woman was still in prison when the episode was filmed.) I'm interested in their stories, partly to see what life in other countries is like (having only travelled outside the US to Mexico and Canada). But it's also fun to count how many opportunities the person had, leading up to their arrest, to give themselves a reality check: "What am I thinking? This will never work. I'm going home." (I usually yell variations of this at the TV during the show.) Of course, hindsight is 20/20. But they all are changed by their experience, and usually turn their lives around for the better.
However, the other 10% of the stories are the true gems. People who are in other countries for legitimate purposes -- for business or vacation, or while travelling the world -- and for whatever reason end up being detained by terrorists or gangs or paramilitary groups. How they deal with their situation, and how they survive, absolutely fascinates me.
This was the case in "Locked Up Abroad - Panama", which aired this week.
Mark Wedeven was born in Columbia, and at two months of age was adopted by a US couple, and moved to the States. In his early 20s he decided to take a personal journey back to Columbia, to "complete the circle". He decided not to just fly to Bogota, like most of us would have done. He decided to travel by land, backpacking and hitching rides. But "the road" only goes so far -- it dead ends in Panama, in a place called the Darien Gap. It's 100 miles of jungle between Panama and Columbia, with narrow trails mostly used by drug traffickers and guerillas. It was the latter group that he encountered on his trip. I won't give all the details -- you can watch it on NatGeo or their website. But while Mark was recounting his story, I realized this was a very special young man.
I'm usually pretty hard on GenX-ers. A lot of them (some, NOT ALL) are unmotivated, even lazy, and they seem to think the world owes them something.
Not Mark.
He struck me as being very insightful about his life, his desires, his emotions, and his... soul, for lack of a better word. He is genuinely moved by his experience and the experiences of the others involved in the story (even his captors). When he is finally released and taken to the US Embassy in Bogota, a nurse asks him, "Are you ok?" And after all the days of being forced to march through the jungle at gunpoint, he finally breaks down and weeps. He admits this on camera, unashamed. He questions his life, and how it affected the people he encountered. And he seems to reach a peace about the experience.
At this point in most episodes, they usually show the person in their current life, with their family or friends, and how they have adjusted after their experience.
But on this episode, the screen went to black, and a message stated that in June 2010, Mark Wedeven was killed in an avalance while climbing Mt. Rainier. The episode was dedicated to his memory.
I was shocked. Here was a young man who had a true spirit of adventure, as well as a very promising future. I believe he could have changed the world, in his own way. I went on the internet to learn more about him.
I was bowled over by what I found out.
He was a carpenter, activist, and father. He taught English as a Second Language to immigrants and volunteered at a homeless shelter.
He first climbed Mt. Rainier when he was 13. Thirteen.
He didn't even own a TV. He and his 5-year old son would check out books from the library. They would go camping and hiking together.
He once outran an avalanche. He even told his mom, "If I die on the mountain, it's ok." Talk about insight.
And he told his mother recently that he was a Christian.
He was 29.
I was crying as I read the accounts of his life, and his death. It's so sad when a young person dies, but especially such an intelligent, caring, passionate young man.
I started to think about my life. Lately, my life has pretty much been... an existence. I get up, go to work, come home, watch tv, go to bed, repeat. I sometimes go to church on Sundays, but rarely go to the social gatherings anymore. My only other connection with the outside world is through the computer or The New Yorker.
That's a "life"?
Mark did more in his 29 years than I've done in 51.
Admittedly, it's been a tough year. Losing Dad has rocked my world. I'm now an orphan. I have no "home". That's the kind of thing that changes you. I look at my future, and see ... nothing. Earlier this year, I considered ending it all.
So, what is my purpose? Why am I here?
I think of the song that played on KSBJ this afternoon.
It's by a singer/songwriter named Matthew West who underwent surgery on his vocal cord:
I don’t wanna go through the motions
I don’t wanna go one more day
Without Your all consuming passion inside of me
I don’t wanna spend my whole life asking
What if I had given everything?
Instead of going through the motions
Maybe Mark Wedeven didn't die in vain.
Maybe, in his death, there's a message for me about my life.