Experiences and Expectations
Life is so counterintuitive for me, and you have to constantly be aware of what's around you to really enjoy it. Because that's all anyone can really enjoy--no amount of dreaming will create something better--and who can say our ideals are better than reality itself all the time? I try to understand what I hate, and love what I ignore, because it truly is all gone when it's over, and you will miss it.
I'm not sure what my expectations were for the Mexico trip, but my expectations wrecked havoc on my sense of satisfaction, until the moment I landed in Villahermosa. Something occurred that I never had thought of while preparing myself mentally for the trip. We were a group of 14 strangers who were about to become a nearly completely enclosed world, especially for those who didn't speak Spanish--the English speaking world suddenly became 14 strangers who we had to spend every living moment with. In such cases, there are no wishes to be made, there are no changes to make, you live with one another, and that's it. You try to come to terms with the things you hate about the people who annoy you, and you try to give some care to those you would generally ignore. We had to be available to one another, because if we didn't the world became immediately larger and more threatening. Without an island of 14 strangers, you were caught in an ocean of something else. People you couldn't read, and just as well couldn't hear. People you could be around, but couldn't be part of. And while that is survivable for two weeks, it's not very enjoyable. So despite expectations for a short study abroad course, we found mostly an intense value in each other. Something that hasn't happened for me since high school.
I'm not sure what my expectations were for the Mexico trip, but my expectations wrecked havoc on my sense of satisfaction, until the moment I landed in Villahermosa. Something occurred that I never had thought of while preparing myself mentally for the trip. We were a group of 14 strangers who were about to become a nearly completely enclosed world, especially for those who didn't speak Spanish--the English speaking world suddenly became 14 strangers who we had to spend every living moment with. In such cases, there are no wishes to be made, there are no changes to make, you live with one another, and that's it. You try to come to terms with the things you hate about the people who annoy you, and you try to give some care to those you would generally ignore. We had to be available to one another, because if we didn't the world became immediately larger and more threatening. Without an island of 14 strangers, you were caught in an ocean of something else. People you couldn't read, and just as well couldn't hear. People you could be around, but couldn't be part of. And while that is survivable for two weeks, it's not very enjoyable. So despite expectations for a short study abroad course, we found mostly an intense value in each other. Something that hasn't happened for me since high school.