(no subject)

[stumpfairy]

It has never been harder thn now to love you. When I am finally taking steps that are away from you. Here I am finding my old self, and you are absent, more absent than before i met you. Because now i am going to face that you will be dissappearing from me, more and more your life becomes a story you tell me, and your happiness. More and more i am in transit. in places that are not really anywhere. and you are in my thoughts, you are like a talisman. in my travels. i am always alone for the purity of it. and you are in my thoughts.

when people sing for an ache
when they come from their lips
like a sweetened spell
you are there in the words they choose
in the simple chords
you are going throughout me
and i miss you more
than you were ever near to me,
love, you have never been with me since i met you
though i can feel now you are going away.
how can i prevent something like this
that almost is nothing.
...i hate that it ended up this way.
and as much as i wish i had said something to you
i know it wouldn't have made a difference.

everything in my life is falling apart
in the way that it is giving way to my future
in the way that is good for the future
but as for my present being,

i think i am waiting for someone better than you,
i think i am hoping he will come soon
and be more amazing than i ever imagined.
that he will be beyond the dream that you are,
the dream i never realized i had
is much more hopeful than the dream i had found,
the dream i could not touch
but that i owned.
i'm done with this. and i feel like i will never take an action toward you. it doesn't feel right.

i'm always the one in love.