flashback
very busy week, i am glad to have tomorrow off. i must clean my room though, i really don't think i have cleaned it in two years.
my dad is all huffing and puffing. it makes me worried that something is wrong with him, even though he just went to the doctor recently, and they said everything sounded good. pray.
i really don't want to be completely unproductive tomorrow, that's all. i mean, what difference does it make if i am? i don't know. maybe i'll go for a run and finish at a place to eat and ride the bus home. not sure. if it's minus ten million outside i'm not going anywhere.
the longer i'm at home, the more i want to stay. but i miss the girls, the suite, the routine, wearing something other than navy blue and khaki every day, having time for a coffee break, and really just going to class and being stimulated. sometimes work is just so slammed, that i can't really do the pictures as well as i could. it turns more into quantity and not quality.
i went out to dinner with jon last night, and it was amazing. it felt just like old times, and he has lost weight. it sounds like his ex girlfriend was ug, we talked and laughed about things, and i was wondering, what are we going to do after dinner?
we come to my decrepit couch and watch tv. and we sit closer, and we end up in the same cuddling position as old times. he kissed me, a small peck, on the lips as he was leaving. all of these feelings came back. i loved that guy. i still do. and things weren't perfect, but no one is.
but we can't get back together. not right now. no long distance thing. no stupid pointless fighting and jealousy. the things i didn't like are still there, but anyways, i have to figure out where my road is taking me.
but i felt really good. and before work got crazy today i was drinking my coffee and smiling about last night.
i realized that everyone i ever talk to about people i'm with or whatever, usually just hear me venting about the bad stuff, and assume that the person is shitty. i have to for one, quit overreacting, two, think before i speak, and three, keep some things to myself sometimes. i want to be a more positive person.
my dad is all huffing and puffing. it makes me worried that something is wrong with him, even though he just went to the doctor recently, and they said everything sounded good. pray.
i really don't want to be completely unproductive tomorrow, that's all. i mean, what difference does it make if i am? i don't know. maybe i'll go for a run and finish at a place to eat and ride the bus home. not sure. if it's minus ten million outside i'm not going anywhere.
the longer i'm at home, the more i want to stay. but i miss the girls, the suite, the routine, wearing something other than navy blue and khaki every day, having time for a coffee break, and really just going to class and being stimulated. sometimes work is just so slammed, that i can't really do the pictures as well as i could. it turns more into quantity and not quality.
i went out to dinner with jon last night, and it was amazing. it felt just like old times, and he has lost weight. it sounds like his ex girlfriend was ug, we talked and laughed about things, and i was wondering, what are we going to do after dinner?
we come to my decrepit couch and watch tv. and we sit closer, and we end up in the same cuddling position as old times. he kissed me, a small peck, on the lips as he was leaving. all of these feelings came back. i loved that guy. i still do. and things weren't perfect, but no one is.
but we can't get back together. not right now. no long distance thing. no stupid pointless fighting and jealousy. the things i didn't like are still there, but anyways, i have to figure out where my road is taking me.
but i felt really good. and before work got crazy today i was drinking my coffee and smiling about last night.
i realized that everyone i ever talk to about people i'm with or whatever, usually just hear me venting about the bad stuff, and assume that the person is shitty. i have to for one, quit overreacting, two, think before i speak, and three, keep some things to myself sometimes. i want to be a more positive person.