hatred and more
so muich bullshit has happened i dont even know where to start. its been about two weeks, which is when the bullshit started, so i guess i'll start with something... so anyways, starting now. just to clarify, im going to fill in a little bit of background and who's who. dan is my best friend, my roommate, the gay one. steph is the red head, a good friend, and also fungi. laura is book, an amazing friend and just all around awesome. heather is my baby, my girl, the greatest thing that has ever happened to me. laura is dating brandon. dan is dating(?) mike. possibly matt as well, im not sure what words hes using for each. anyways. steph is dating jim, but used to "date" ben.
ok, on to the bullshit:
brandon was having a fourth of july party on the friday after the 4th. dan, steph, jim, and book were all their. i was at home sleeping because at the time i was still hating on brandon for old shit. anyway, dan was talking to someone about past fourths and happened to mention last year, when he slept with ben... *if ur that interested, im sure theres a blog somewhere about it*. steph heard and started screaming at him from the second floor landing. dan went up there, got in her face, and laura had to hold him back. later, jim was drinking (which he doesnt normally do) and passed out. steph and brandon took him upstairs. later still, dan was upstairs using the bathroom and checked to be sure jim was still alive and all that jazz, since steph was downstairs at the party. well steph came out of nowhere and started screaming again. anyway, long story shorter, dan decided he was sick of steph. i've been saying this for a while now. well, saturday night we had a party, woo-woo lots of fun, steph wasnt invited, i made nice with brandon. tuesday night i was babysitting and steph came over for a while and told me that she was "convinced" in her "heart of hearts" that dan molested jim. then she got pissy because i very nearly laughed in her face. i told her that it was impossible, because dan was past the preadolescent stage of being attracted by a limp dick in the dark, and because dan is completely turned off by jim's dirty white hick persona. so to continue, wednesday dan and i left for camp to see heather... that will be a completely other entry because it takes way too long to tell, but im just going to mention that i am never drinking southern comfort again. it makes me forget things... anyway. so we get back, and i have steph over on tuesday because i think maybe i can patch things up. i dont want to lose another friend type thing. and as shes leaving after about anj hour, she tells me that shes thinking about telling jim that dan molested him *see above for reasons explaining the absurdity* and i told her she couldnt, because if she did, jim would show up at my front door, they would fight someone would get hurt. and she started to say but if that had happened to me, and i told her, no, it didnt happen to jim, and when i say someone would get hurt, i didnt mean one of them, i meant one of us because i sure as hell would not stand there and let them fight. then i told her to just go home. i was done, just go home. well, last night she came over to talk to dan and flat out fucking lied. i heard her lie. she told him that for four or five days she had been thinking she was wrong *two days before she told me she still believed it* then she said that dan had never apoligized for sleeping with ben. laura and i both heard him apoligize the day after, not for doing it, but for hurting her by doing it. plus she told me herself multiple times that he had apoligized. when we first started hanging out, i told her the one thing i could not forgive was being lied to. i dont think she realized the my fiercest loyalty will always be for the one who was there most often. and dan was there for me when she wasnt, when she was off with ben, or just sulking and being anti social, daniel and laura were there. even on those days when i am actually scaring dan, he is there and he is holding me up. steph has tried to hold me back too many times. she tried to sabotage my relationship with heather, and when that didnt work, she lied to me about it. i dont need people like that in my life. i have enough trouble holding myself back and keeping myself down, i dont need anyone else help.
ok, on to the bullshit:
brandon was having a fourth of july party on the friday after the 4th. dan, steph, jim, and book were all their. i was at home sleeping because at the time i was still hating on brandon for old shit. anyway, dan was talking to someone about past fourths and happened to mention last year, when he slept with ben... *if ur that interested, im sure theres a blog somewhere about it*. steph heard and started screaming at him from the second floor landing. dan went up there, got in her face, and laura had to hold him back. later, jim was drinking (which he doesnt normally do) and passed out. steph and brandon took him upstairs. later still, dan was upstairs using the bathroom and checked to be sure jim was still alive and all that jazz, since steph was downstairs at the party. well steph came out of nowhere and started screaming again. anyway, long story shorter, dan decided he was sick of steph. i've been saying this for a while now. well, saturday night we had a party, woo-woo lots of fun, steph wasnt invited, i made nice with brandon. tuesday night i was babysitting and steph came over for a while and told me that she was "convinced" in her "heart of hearts" that dan molested jim. then she got pissy because i very nearly laughed in her face. i told her that it was impossible, because dan was past the preadolescent stage of being attracted by a limp dick in the dark, and because dan is completely turned off by jim's dirty white hick persona. so to continue, wednesday dan and i left for camp to see heather... that will be a completely other entry because it takes way too long to tell, but im just going to mention that i am never drinking southern comfort again. it makes me forget things... anyway. so we get back, and i have steph over on tuesday because i think maybe i can patch things up. i dont want to lose another friend type thing. and as shes leaving after about anj hour, she tells me that shes thinking about telling jim that dan molested him *see above for reasons explaining the absurdity* and i told her she couldnt, because if she did, jim would show up at my front door, they would fight someone would get hurt. and she started to say but if that had happened to me, and i told her, no, it didnt happen to jim, and when i say someone would get hurt, i didnt mean one of them, i meant one of us because i sure as hell would not stand there and let them fight. then i told her to just go home. i was done, just go home. well, last night she came over to talk to dan and flat out fucking lied. i heard her lie. she told him that for four or five days she had been thinking she was wrong *two days before she told me she still believed it* then she said that dan had never apoligized for sleeping with ben. laura and i both heard him apoligize the day after, not for doing it, but for hurting her by doing it. plus she told me herself multiple times that he had apoligized. when we first started hanging out, i told her the one thing i could not forgive was being lied to. i dont think she realized the my fiercest loyalty will always be for the one who was there most often. and dan was there for me when she wasnt, when she was off with ben, or just sulking and being anti social, daniel and laura were there. even on those days when i am actually scaring dan, he is there and he is holding me up. steph has tried to hold me back too many times. she tried to sabotage my relationship with heather, and when that didnt work, she lied to me about it. i dont need people like that in my life. i have enough trouble holding myself back and keeping myself down, i dont need anyone else help.