And to all a good night
The holiday decorations were put up in my office building lobby over the weekend. They're adorable. I want to take photos. They're these wintry scenes with polar bears and baby seals and giant snowflakes, ornaments, and gift boxes. They're almost non-denominational and I love that. They really are very cute. However, I have an intense desire to have photos taken in these bucolic settings as follows:
1. All the polar bears, faces covered in "blood", in various stages of devouring the baby seals. Hey, that's more realistic than the bears cavorting among ornaments and gifts!
2. Several of the polar bears, faces and paws covered in "blood", devouring various parts of my body. Mmmmm...Helen: It's what's for dinner!
3. Me dressed in full, heavy-duty North Pole winter garb with a bat raised above my head. Shall I say it? Ok. I want a photo of me "clubbing" one of those papier mache baby seals. WHAT???
I would LOVE to send these out as my holiday cards!! WHAT???!!! Fine, only to my friends who would appreciate my sense of humor and utter irreverence.
I have expressed my desires (with the exception of #3) to two individuals thus far. One thinks I'm sick, disgusting, very disturbed, and in need of immediate professional help. The other thinks I'm gruesome and weird but a comic genius, none the less. I'm going to go with the latter.
More about what's been going on with me to come soon! (I bet you can't wait based on this post!)
1. All the polar bears, faces covered in "blood", in various stages of devouring the baby seals. Hey, that's more realistic than the bears cavorting among ornaments and gifts!
2. Several of the polar bears, faces and paws covered in "blood", devouring various parts of my body. Mmmmm...Helen: It's what's for dinner!
3. Me dressed in full, heavy-duty North Pole winter garb with a bat raised above my head. Shall I say it? Ok. I want a photo of me "clubbing" one of those papier mache baby seals. WHAT???
I would LOVE to send these out as my holiday cards!! WHAT???!!! Fine, only to my friends who would appreciate my sense of humor and utter irreverence.
I have expressed my desires (with the exception of #3) to two individuals thus far. One thinks I'm sick, disgusting, very disturbed, and in need of immediate professional help. The other thinks I'm gruesome and weird but a comic genius, none the less. I'm going to go with the latter.
More about what's been going on with me to come soon! (I bet you can't wait based on this post!)