Third post! Story time!
Title: ‘B-Side’
Author: peep_scarf108
Pairing: Nick/Julian
Word Count: ~4,400
Rating: Uh. PG? Nothing too serious.
Summary: “He looked pissed but he probably wouldn’t bother. We are a long way up.”
Author's Note: Third post ( Read more... )
Apologies for the delayed response, but I have no internet connection at home (at the moment, anyway) and was out of the office for a few days for the hols.
To answer your question, I was expecting the usual slash tropes...you know the drilly - both male protagpnsts acting unrealistically drippy and romance-y. Obsessing over their feelings and fears about the relationship, pouting over imagined slights and/or jealousies, having petty lover's quarrels that end in declarations of undying love, etc., etc., etc. Alot of people think the average slash fiction writer makes their male characters act too much like women, but they're more like characters in romance novels - just unrealistic. I mean, to be perfectly honest, women don't even act as sappy as most of these characters do. There's really none of that in your story thus far.
Pluswhich, your dialogue is spot on. Sounds like real people talking. In general, there's just a hard edge to your story that most slash fiction lacks.
In all honestly, I rarely get through more than a couple of paragraphs of any piece of fan fiction, because it's usually kind of lame. I probably shouldn't be saying that here, but it's the truth.
Incidentally, the only issue I have with your story is the use of the word "man." I think it would sound more naturalistic if Julian was referred to as a "guy," since the two characters are close in age. Whenever Nick thinks of Julian as "a man" or "the man," it sound like he's referring to a forty-five year old. But that's just me, perhaps.
Keep writing.
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Thank you for your kind words about my story.
Slash writing to me isn't just about pr0n. As you may have noticed I haven't posted anything remotely like that here....yet.
I find it more interesting to try and write a believable story, and as you said this story has a 'hard edge' I suppose, in this case, I did that. <3
The thing with the 'man'/'guy' thing. Yeah it's a bit sketchy... I referred to him as both 'man' and 'guy' before he was properly named/introduced. Then afterwards it was mainly 'man.' Simply because I thought 'guy' was too informal and it's a harder word. If that makes sense. I also just needed another title for Julian which wasn't just his name. But yes I see what you mean. It's a bit...yeah.. -_-
But again, thank you for commenting at all. It's just nice to know what people are thinking.
You should post some sweet stories too. x
Happy Merry New Year times!
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