Fic: No Choice in the Matter (Jensen Ackles/Jared Padalecki, NC-17, Sequel to Intolerable Cruelty)
Title: No Choice in the Matter
Fandom: Supernatural RPF
Rating: NC-17 (overall)
Chapter: 1/5
Chapter Length: 4379 words
Pairing: Jensen Ackles/Jared Padalecki
Warnings/kinks: hate-sex, A/B/O, dub-con
Summary: Sequel to Intolerable Cruelty. Bonded to someone he loathes, Jared has to navigate a path he never expected to follow, and to fight against something he has no choice in.
Chapter: 2 3 4,5, 6
Jared fished in his desk drawer hoping against hope he had some wipes or even some tissues stashed in there, but coming up short. With a grimace of distaste he resigned himself to having to spray himself with deodorant and make a dash to the loos as quickly as he could. Jensen now on the other side of the desk was zipping up his pants and avoiding his eyes as though either ashamed or disgusted. Jared felt a sick helpless wave of dislike wash over him, and fought back an insane urge to punch something or scream or even just crouch on the floor and wrap his arms around himself and hope that this was some twisted dream that his subconscious had dreamed up especially for him after an over indulgence in cheese.
He didn’t do any of them though, just stood and waited for Jensen to be done. They didn’t exchange a word as arms folded Jared watched Jensen push back the filing cabinet from where it had blocked the door and left. He waited five minutes, eyes on the clock watching every second pass before he left the room and hurried to the bathroom studiously ignoring the two people he passed. He saw Alison’s nose wrinkle and turned his face away, feeling it burn with embarrassment. Once inside he sank down onto the toilet seat and breathed in deeply, steadily. First things first, before he thought about bonding, collars, Jensen, work permits, he had to clean up. Had to get rid of the worst of the slick, the worst of the come, so that every person he walked past didn’t know he’d been fucked stupid by Jensen, bent over the desk like every omega porn movie ever, the only thing missing the breathy little sighs about how big the cock they were being fucked with was.
Handfuls of tissue later, soaked in water and the shitty lavender soap that some HR initiative had chosen for its ‘calming’ effect, and his ass and the backs of his thighs felt semi-clean, less as though the scent had been branded on him indelibly, more as though he’d been scrubbed with itchy toilet paper. He finished off with another spray of deodorant, preferring to let his colleagues think that he’d been seized with an attack of awkward teenage boy, than let them know the real truth.
Back at his desk, reading through the details of the Mirrorlake bid felt like the most surreal thing ever. He couldn’t focus properly, eyes only picking up on snatches of phrases, struggling to synthesise them, until he threw them down and looked back at the ceiling as though the answers to his problems would be written there in stark black and white. Nothing looked back except the blank white tiles, and restlessly he stood, poised for flight with nowhere to go. Get a grip. Jensen hasn’t fucked your brains out, he told himself coldly. He was behaving like the worst stereotype of an omega, wilful, hysterical, unable to cope with the world as it actually was, everything in his life that he’d fought not to be.
This time he forced himself to concentrate, to read every line ten times over if he had to, to mark them clearly and coolly, to prove that he was worth his salary. The thought of Jensen in his office doubtless getting down to grips with exactly this project spurred him on with grim determination. They had a meeting this afternoon with the execs, they needed everything done, dusted and perfect. Jeff was relying on them, the company was relying on them, and there was no way in hell he’d let Jensen sneer at the thought that getting fucked that morning had put him so badly off his work. As time passed, his rhythm came back, and he imperceptibly relaxed into it. He knew this back to front, knew every line, had worked on it for weeks, the knowledge wasn’t going to desert him now.
Taking a five minute break, he made a split second decision. He wasn’t walking into his meeting like this, and picking up the phone he called his neighbour, Andy, confident he’d be at home. Sure enough he picked up the phone perkily. “Huntingdon residence, how can I help?”
“Hey Andy,” Jared said crossing his fingers hard and hoping against hope. “Could I ask you to do me a massive favour?”
There was silence for a second. Andy and Jared were friendly but they weren’t on the sort of terms that really called for big favours. Jared had been round to dinner a few times before the invitations had tailed off, when Jared had made it firmly clear that he wasn’t interested in meeting alpha friends of theirs. Relations had remained rather static since; Andy would pop by once or twice a month for a coffee and a chat, and although Jared liked Emma, he preferred it like that without the set of skewed social dynamics that came from an alpha and two omegas in a room.
The Huntingdons retained a traditional household model, Andy served dinner then knelt by the chair Emma sat in, receiving a nod from her when he indicated a wish to join the conversation. To Jared, raised in a non-traditional hippy household where his mom hadn’t even been collared properly, sticking to the often renewed piece of twine her husband had put round her neck on their wedding night, and where though she’d observed the outside rituals pretty strictly (two steps behind, leash on formal occasions, no speech with anyone outside of the pre-approved list,) inside the house it’d been a different story even with guests round.
“If I can,” Andy finally said, cautiously.
“Do you remember I left that key with you in case of emergencies? Could you pop in and grab one of my suits, there’s a dry-cleaned one on the back of the door in my bedroom. I can meet you halfway, I just don’t have enough time on my lunchbreak to get home and back. I’d really owe you one.” He clenched his hand around the phone, feeling the tension in his body.
“I don’t know,” was the dubious reply. “I’m not sure Emma would be happy, and I don’t drive so it’d mean public transport.” The few words covered a depth of doubt. Most people from habit took no notice of bonded omegas properly collared and understood that talking to them wasn’t appropriate, but there were always a few who didn’t bother observing common politeness, young packs of betas, lone unbonded alphas who could make trouble. For an omega as traditional and ritualised as Andy travelling without an alpha could be an ordeal. Jared stayed silent, fingers still crossed. After a moment’s silence Andy sighed. “I’ll phone Emma and ask her if I can,” he allowed grudgingly. “You don’t sound well.” With a click he put the phone down, and Jared set the handset down.
Waiting for Andy to ring back, he visualised for a moment a life like that, bounded by walls, rules, restrictions and shuddered. It worked for Andy, he liked the headspace, liked being taken care of and adored by his alpha, had never wanted to work outside the home and for the short time he’d done so hadn’t enjoyed it, didn’t really have much interest in other people, but for Jared the possibility felt like a living death. While he waited, he made a note on his cell reminding himself to call his lawyer, let him know of the change in his status, and to ask for a recommendation for someone experienced in handling unwanted bonds, and hesitantly added in a reminder to call his parents.
A moment later the phone rang and he snatched it up. “Emma says yes,” Andy said without preamble. “I’ll come by in about an hour if you text me the directions.”
Jared breathed out in relief. “Thank you so much,” he said, his gratitude completely genuine. “I owe you guys big-time.” He hesitated for a second then decided in for a penny, in for a pound. “Could you bring some wipes as well?”
Andy’s reply was intrigued. “You mean like baby-wipes, wipes?”
“Yeah,” he said, too desperate now to dissemble. It wasn’t like Andy was going to tell anyone but Emma after all.
Andy thankfully didn’t press the issue, just agreed and rang off. Jared texted him the address and went back to work with renewed concentration. Once he’d thrashed out the final issues with Mirrorlake, he emailed the file to Jensen and Danneel for double checking, and went through the initial bid that Jensen had marked up for him earlier, trying to lose himself in his work again to the exclusion of everything else, until he barely even heard the knock on the door. He tensed up immediately, fearing it’d be Jensen back, but it was just Danneel, the third member of their team, and the coordinator of their bid popping by to check he was ready.
He didn’t resent it from her, she was a compulsive organiser who’d been known to chivvy Jeff into things (something which no-one else had really managed), and her alpha honed personality had channelled itself remarkably well into welding a workable team out of the three of them, mostly by insisting that they kept their personal feelings out of the office and enforcing it. Now she stood there looking at him quizzically. “Are you sure you’re feeling all right Jared?”
The inquiry struck him on the raw particularly as he was feeling decidedly not all right, and he replied a little more harshly than he’d meant to. “I’m fine. There’s no need to fuss.”
Danneel looked at him levelly for a long, long second and he cringed internally, fighting the urge to bow his shoulders, lower his head and apologise. It wasn’t a look she usually turned on him, but for that moment he wished that it were even Jensen in the room instead. People often forgot just how focused and how strongly alpha Danneel was, and while she might cultivate it from their competition and their customers she didn’t like it from her co-workers. His nose still extra-sensitive from his heat the day before was picking up on her displeasure as well, and adding to his need to metaphorically roll over. Never one to over do it though, she blinked and let him go. “We need to be in peak shape for this meeting,” she said, her voice not revealing a hint of what had just happened. “All three of us need to be on the ball, and rolling with the punches.”
He nodded, mentally already psyching himself up, absurdly pleased that he hadn’t given in to the urge to apologise. The fact that he was an omega meant the contract negotiators often tried to focus their efforts on him rather than anyone else in the room, trying to get him to weaken, allow them to gain a foothold by interjecting their voice subtly with command-echos, and the more practice he had in ignoring them the better. “Sure. We should probably thrash out the section two details first.”
She bent her head over the relevant section that he pointed out and agreed. They’d been over this multiple times before, but it never hurt to cover the ground just once more. Before she left to collect her things, she grinned at him a bit cheekily. “If you’re playing Buzzword Bingo, I’ll be pissed if you’ve forgotten on the ball and rolling with the punches.” His face relaxed into a genuine smile.
His phone buzzed on the desk, nearly vibrating itself off. Catching it he read the text. “In the lobby. Andy.” Taking the elevator down he stared fixedly at the floor rather than his reflected face in front of him, pretending to be so engrossed in his shoes that he didn’t have room in his mind for anything else. Even in the short space of a minute away from his work and other people the intrusive thoughts were coming back, sending his blood pressure spiralling. He had to get over this, couldn’t let everything that reminded him of the biggest mistake of his life impinge on him.
Andy was bouncing impatiently on his toes by the time he arrived, a dry-cleaning bag over one shoulder and a drugstore bag in the other. He handed them to Jared who thanked him immediately and profusely. He had an hour before the meeting, plenty of time to get changed and properly cleaned up. He hadn’t bargained on Andy being quite so sharp though. He was staring at Jared pretty sharply. “Did you bond? he asked in a whisper.
Jared stared at him in shock. He hadn’t known himself until Jensen had told him. What on earth sort of signals was he sending out? Denial sprang automatically to his lips. “Of course not,” he said instantly. “Who would I bond with Why would I bond with anyone?” Aware of how frantic he sounded he shut up, cursing his inability to remain calm.
Andy raised an eyebrow. ”I can sense something different,” he said, leaving Jared to remember that Jesus fucking hell before bonding And had worked, as a therapist adjunct, his ability to project calm on a small scale, and to receive a limited range of emotions ranking him as a level five empath. Low enough, but more than sufficient to detect such a big change. Since his pairing, he’d ceased work of course, his gift mostly shut off by the fact that his bond now formed his primary emotional input. Andy watched him put it together. “Who is it?” he asked curiously.
Jared didn’t bother denying it anymore. “I’ll tell you everything when I get home,” he said. “I don’t have time right now. Thank you so much for bringing the suit I appreciate it more than I can say.” He backed towards the desk, leaving Andy obviously bursting with questions which couldn’t be answered.
Twenty minutes later, clean, be-suited and booted, he met up with Danneel and Jensen, studiously avoiding the latter’s eyes. He needn’t have bothered, Jensen’s eyes slid over him almost without registering his presence, a feeling Jared found himself disliking far more than their previous antagonism. Jensen didn’t get to dismiss him, to write him off as another slut omega only working until they found their mate. Danneel shot him a puzzled glance, and he consciously relaxed himself. Acting oddly would make her suspicious, and he didn’t want anyone in the office to know about this, not until he knew everything, his legal position, his rights, not until he’d sorted out with Jensen how they were going to fix this.
This finalisation meeting was the last in a long series, and Jensen had really grown to dislike the other companies team, in particular their nominal superior who’d introduced himself with the chummy words ‘call me Martin,’ and had proceeded to plow right on in, into trying to force a deal highly unbeneficial to Morgans, and designed it seemed, merely to raise his own credit in his own company. Jensen had christened the other man ‘slicker,’ though the nasty grin that hovered around his mouth as he said ‘no offence to slickers’ had made it clear it was an unsubtle dig at Jared as well.
It hadn’t helped him like the other man, that Martin had been first shocked then contemptuous of the fact that Jared was an Omega. It wasn’t like it was obvious after all, he was taller and stockier, than the general stereotype , he scrubbed well enough every morning and wore a heavy enough cologne that you couldn’t smell it off him, and hell he was wearing a suit and sitting in a boardroom. It hadn’t been obvious at least, until the other man had flicked through the documents and noticed the ‘O’ in Jared’s name. His ears burnt hot remembering it, the surprise and disdain that had accompanied the queried ‘Jare O adalecki, as though there was some mistake, some smudge that changed a B or an A into an O. Danneel had handled it, stepped smoothly into the awkward silence, asked if they had a problem, stared Martin down until he looked away, then looked at Jared kindly in a way that had almost humiliated him more than the ignorant fucker opposite him giving a dose of the disdain he was used to had. He hadn’t been able to muster much warm feeling for Mirrorlake after that, and he was taking a little bit of savage pleasure in eviscerating their accounts today. He could even muster the barest flicker of admiration for Jensen’s generally sandpapery managerial style.
At the end of the meeting with nearly every detail thrashed out, and only two points that needed serious discussion at their final meeting the very next day, Martin had stood and leaned forward to shake their hands, heading straight for Danneel first then Jensen, and hesitating a second before offering his hand to Jared who wished he could crush it with his own. For the sake of the deal he restrained himself, and shook the limp hand profered once before dropping it quickly, unnerved by the sharp sting of feeling he felt. He’d tested as almostly completely null psy at birth and then again at puberty (which had ironically raised fears from his parents that he wouldn’t be able to bond at all as complete nulls generally couldn’t regardless of their biology.) He wondered if he should get himself retested- a bond in unlikely circumstances, and now this. He was pretty sure he hadn’t been imagining the weird sensation, or the intense look in the other man’s eyes.
He was unsurprised when the other man asked if he could have a minute of his time. The rest left after a quick shake of hands all around, and he turned and faced Martin crossing his arms across his chest before he realised how defensive he looked. “Is there a problem?” he asked coolly. This had happened before. Alphas who didn’t think he should be in the room while a deal was going on, or who wanted to intimidate him for some unknown reason often pulled him aside to tell him what they thought of him. Even worse were the ones who tried to hit on him, or who had the nerve to complain about him not acting in the way they had expected. Being called into Jeff’s office because an outraged Alpha had complained at the underhand tactic of allowing an Omega in the room in an attempt to distract them from the point at hand had been a particular low point.
Martin smiled, a nasty twist of his lips. “I wanted to keep it strictly professional in here during the meeting,” he said, jerking his head at the room. “No need to let this jeopardise the deal after all. But I couldn’t help noticing that you’re registered as unbonded.”
Jared repressed an instinctive reaction to punch the other man. Omega status was a matter of public record, but it did require you actually bothering to go and look it up, and it was a shitty and intrusive thing to do. Cold as ice he replied. “What’s my status to you?”
“Nothing to me,” Martin replied smoothly. “I’m bonded already.” Like that wasn’t obvious, with the bonding bracelet showing just beneath one wankerish double cuff. “But I think it’d be of interest to your boss and the rest of your team that you haven’t declared your new bond. Can’t be bothered to file the waivers and announcement, or just too stupid? Did you think people wouldn't notice? The two of you are utterly and completely obvious, it was rolling off you like you'd only bonded this morning or something.” Jared was pretty sure that was an exaggeration. He'd already spotted that the bonding bracelet was marked with a empathy level five like Andy's. Martin paused as though to let Jared reply, and when met with silence he continued. “I’m sure I don’t need to remind you that it’s a civil offence not to amend your status immediately.”
Jared met his eyes with a level gaze. This was a new brand of bullshit. “What makes you think I haven’t?” he asked steadily. “Since you seem to be keeping yourself up to date with my life. It takes time to change papers and be registered after all.” There was a flicker of doubt in Martin’s eyes, and he continued. “As you said, let’s keep this strictly professional. I don’t need to explain anything to you, you’re not my boss, you’re not the city council, so keep the fuck out of this.” He injected the deliberate obscenity with every ounce of force he could muster, imbuing it with all the disdain he could manage while feeling cold and shocked inside.
It was obvious what Martin’s game was. What he was saying was technically true, a same-day registering of bond acknowledgement was standard, could be done by text, phone call, internet, but in practice there was lee-way, the actual ceremony didn’t have to take place for months, just the cursory registration and getting an ID bracelet. How he was saying it was a whole other matter, the implicit blackmail that lurked behind his words grating to the ears. It mattered to Jared, bonding meant a re-negotiation of your contract with your employer and a whole ton of things that didn’t matter to Jensen, and now the time he’d hoped to get things sorted out in was rapidly vanishing in front of his eyes.
There was a moment of tension where Martin leaned forward. “I’m not sure if you understand Jared,” he said, and his words were clear and cold. “Mirrorlake wants this deal, but we want it at 7% not 5%, and I can assure you that we will get it. This means more to your boss than you do, and if we pull out because there’s an irregular Omega fouling up the works with sloppy thinking, and even sloppier paperwork it’ll be your job at stake. Tomorrow, I expect you to have come round to our way of thinking on this.” He smiled with no warmth. “I’m sure you can get yourself all registered up tonight, but you know what that means.”
Two mandatory weeks off work, for doctor visits, the ceremony, the honeymoon and first heat as a bonded couple. The time most couples dreamed of with excitement, and planned meticulously for. Two weeks where not only would he be off the deal after every scrap of hard work he’d done to make it happen, but so would Jensen and despite his internal resolve not to quail, he couldn’t imagine the sort of shitstorm that would result from that. Something must have shown in his eyes because Martin gave a satisfied nod without another word, leaving Jared alone and irresolute in the room.
His common-sense told him to go to Jeff, even to Jensen or Danneel and tell them about this. It was blackmail of the worst sort and he knew they wouldn’t, couldn’t capitulate to it. But everything that Martin said held true. Him being unregistered was grounds for complaint, was grounds for Mirrorlake backing out of a deal that Morgans did need, while trumpeting the reason why far and wide. Him registering and avoiding that was impossible. But equally it seemed like forcing through a change in favour of the other company was impossible, and would throw his whole career into jeopardy.
Slowly he gathered up his papers and left the room. This day just kept getting shittier and shittier. Jensen leaning on the door-frame outside waiting for him wasn’t going to help matters either. He felt a tingle of desire and squashed it right down, grimly getting hold of himself. Being bonded was turning out to be a nightmare of epic proportions. He had seen the momentary flare in Jensen’s eyes as well, a moment of hot fire as quickly suppressed and replaced with the indolent look of dislike he sometimes affected. He pushed deliberately past, sucking in a breath as even that minor contact sharpened his senses. When they’d done sex education classes in school, they’d never mentioned this, never mentioned how proximity could alter your perceptions, and make you crave your mate. But then there hadn’t been much need probably. Most people wanted to fuck their partner all the time, not punch them in the face.
Jensen followed him, and Jared felt the hairs on the back of his neck prickle. "What do you want?" he demanded. He meant to sound firm and confrontational but he just sounded tired to his own ears.
Jensen passed him and stopped, turning around to face him. "We need to talk this through," he said, and his voice was exhausted as well. Looking closer Jared could see that the strain of the day had taken it's toll on Jensen also, his face fatigued and worn looking. He remembered as though from nowhere that you were meant to spend time close together after bonding, meant to lie in each others arms; savour the warmth and the closeness, and get used to the sensation knowing you'd do it for the rest of your natural life. He couldn't imagine cuddling Jensen, or being cuddled by him, couldn't imagine touching him without wanting to fuck or throw up. Not a bone of his body actually believed that one day the dry burning edge of need and dislike would dissipate into the companionship and soul-deep closeness shared by most couples.
He couldn't deny that this needed discussion though, in all fairness this affected Jensen nearly as much as it did him. "I know," he replied, complete weariness saturating him all of a sudden. It was all too hard to take in. Yesterday morning he'd been free, single, with a great job, working towards living a lifestyle his grandparents wouldn't even have been able to imagine, today he had a partner and his job was in jeopardy unless he betrayed his principles and still maybe then. "Come on. Let's go to my place." He knew what that entailed, knew how the night would probably end, but right now he was too tired to care.
Chapter Two
Fandom: Supernatural RPF
Rating: NC-17 (overall)
Chapter: 1/5
Chapter Length: 4379 words
Pairing: Jensen Ackles/Jared Padalecki
Warnings/kinks: hate-sex, A/B/O, dub-con
Summary: Sequel to Intolerable Cruelty. Bonded to someone he loathes, Jared has to navigate a path he never expected to follow, and to fight against something he has no choice in.
Chapter: 2 3 4,5, 6
Jared fished in his desk drawer hoping against hope he had some wipes or even some tissues stashed in there, but coming up short. With a grimace of distaste he resigned himself to having to spray himself with deodorant and make a dash to the loos as quickly as he could. Jensen now on the other side of the desk was zipping up his pants and avoiding his eyes as though either ashamed or disgusted. Jared felt a sick helpless wave of dislike wash over him, and fought back an insane urge to punch something or scream or even just crouch on the floor and wrap his arms around himself and hope that this was some twisted dream that his subconscious had dreamed up especially for him after an over indulgence in cheese.
He didn’t do any of them though, just stood and waited for Jensen to be done. They didn’t exchange a word as arms folded Jared watched Jensen push back the filing cabinet from where it had blocked the door and left. He waited five minutes, eyes on the clock watching every second pass before he left the room and hurried to the bathroom studiously ignoring the two people he passed. He saw Alison’s nose wrinkle and turned his face away, feeling it burn with embarrassment. Once inside he sank down onto the toilet seat and breathed in deeply, steadily. First things first, before he thought about bonding, collars, Jensen, work permits, he had to clean up. Had to get rid of the worst of the slick, the worst of the come, so that every person he walked past didn’t know he’d been fucked stupid by Jensen, bent over the desk like every omega porn movie ever, the only thing missing the breathy little sighs about how big the cock they were being fucked with was.
Handfuls of tissue later, soaked in water and the shitty lavender soap that some HR initiative had chosen for its ‘calming’ effect, and his ass and the backs of his thighs felt semi-clean, less as though the scent had been branded on him indelibly, more as though he’d been scrubbed with itchy toilet paper. He finished off with another spray of deodorant, preferring to let his colleagues think that he’d been seized with an attack of awkward teenage boy, than let them know the real truth.
Back at his desk, reading through the details of the Mirrorlake bid felt like the most surreal thing ever. He couldn’t focus properly, eyes only picking up on snatches of phrases, struggling to synthesise them, until he threw them down and looked back at the ceiling as though the answers to his problems would be written there in stark black and white. Nothing looked back except the blank white tiles, and restlessly he stood, poised for flight with nowhere to go. Get a grip. Jensen hasn’t fucked your brains out, he told himself coldly. He was behaving like the worst stereotype of an omega, wilful, hysterical, unable to cope with the world as it actually was, everything in his life that he’d fought not to be.
This time he forced himself to concentrate, to read every line ten times over if he had to, to mark them clearly and coolly, to prove that he was worth his salary. The thought of Jensen in his office doubtless getting down to grips with exactly this project spurred him on with grim determination. They had a meeting this afternoon with the execs, they needed everything done, dusted and perfect. Jeff was relying on them, the company was relying on them, and there was no way in hell he’d let Jensen sneer at the thought that getting fucked that morning had put him so badly off his work. As time passed, his rhythm came back, and he imperceptibly relaxed into it. He knew this back to front, knew every line, had worked on it for weeks, the knowledge wasn’t going to desert him now.
Taking a five minute break, he made a split second decision. He wasn’t walking into his meeting like this, and picking up the phone he called his neighbour, Andy, confident he’d be at home. Sure enough he picked up the phone perkily. “Huntingdon residence, how can I help?”
“Hey Andy,” Jared said crossing his fingers hard and hoping against hope. “Could I ask you to do me a massive favour?”
There was silence for a second. Andy and Jared were friendly but they weren’t on the sort of terms that really called for big favours. Jared had been round to dinner a few times before the invitations had tailed off, when Jared had made it firmly clear that he wasn’t interested in meeting alpha friends of theirs. Relations had remained rather static since; Andy would pop by once or twice a month for a coffee and a chat, and although Jared liked Emma, he preferred it like that without the set of skewed social dynamics that came from an alpha and two omegas in a room.
The Huntingdons retained a traditional household model, Andy served dinner then knelt by the chair Emma sat in, receiving a nod from her when he indicated a wish to join the conversation. To Jared, raised in a non-traditional hippy household where his mom hadn’t even been collared properly, sticking to the often renewed piece of twine her husband had put round her neck on their wedding night, and where though she’d observed the outside rituals pretty strictly (two steps behind, leash on formal occasions, no speech with anyone outside of the pre-approved list,) inside the house it’d been a different story even with guests round.
“If I can,” Andy finally said, cautiously.
“Do you remember I left that key with you in case of emergencies? Could you pop in and grab one of my suits, there’s a dry-cleaned one on the back of the door in my bedroom. I can meet you halfway, I just don’t have enough time on my lunchbreak to get home and back. I’d really owe you one.” He clenched his hand around the phone, feeling the tension in his body.
“I don’t know,” was the dubious reply. “I’m not sure Emma would be happy, and I don’t drive so it’d mean public transport.” The few words covered a depth of doubt. Most people from habit took no notice of bonded omegas properly collared and understood that talking to them wasn’t appropriate, but there were always a few who didn’t bother observing common politeness, young packs of betas, lone unbonded alphas who could make trouble. For an omega as traditional and ritualised as Andy travelling without an alpha could be an ordeal. Jared stayed silent, fingers still crossed. After a moment’s silence Andy sighed. “I’ll phone Emma and ask her if I can,” he allowed grudgingly. “You don’t sound well.” With a click he put the phone down, and Jared set the handset down.
Waiting for Andy to ring back, he visualised for a moment a life like that, bounded by walls, rules, restrictions and shuddered. It worked for Andy, he liked the headspace, liked being taken care of and adored by his alpha, had never wanted to work outside the home and for the short time he’d done so hadn’t enjoyed it, didn’t really have much interest in other people, but for Jared the possibility felt like a living death. While he waited, he made a note on his cell reminding himself to call his lawyer, let him know of the change in his status, and to ask for a recommendation for someone experienced in handling unwanted bonds, and hesitantly added in a reminder to call his parents.
A moment later the phone rang and he snatched it up. “Emma says yes,” Andy said without preamble. “I’ll come by in about an hour if you text me the directions.”
Jared breathed out in relief. “Thank you so much,” he said, his gratitude completely genuine. “I owe you guys big-time.” He hesitated for a second then decided in for a penny, in for a pound. “Could you bring some wipes as well?”
Andy’s reply was intrigued. “You mean like baby-wipes, wipes?”
“Yeah,” he said, too desperate now to dissemble. It wasn’t like Andy was going to tell anyone but Emma after all.
Andy thankfully didn’t press the issue, just agreed and rang off. Jared texted him the address and went back to work with renewed concentration. Once he’d thrashed out the final issues with Mirrorlake, he emailed the file to Jensen and Danneel for double checking, and went through the initial bid that Jensen had marked up for him earlier, trying to lose himself in his work again to the exclusion of everything else, until he barely even heard the knock on the door. He tensed up immediately, fearing it’d be Jensen back, but it was just Danneel, the third member of their team, and the coordinator of their bid popping by to check he was ready.
He didn’t resent it from her, she was a compulsive organiser who’d been known to chivvy Jeff into things (something which no-one else had really managed), and her alpha honed personality had channelled itself remarkably well into welding a workable team out of the three of them, mostly by insisting that they kept their personal feelings out of the office and enforcing it. Now she stood there looking at him quizzically. “Are you sure you’re feeling all right Jared?”
The inquiry struck him on the raw particularly as he was feeling decidedly not all right, and he replied a little more harshly than he’d meant to. “I’m fine. There’s no need to fuss.”
Danneel looked at him levelly for a long, long second and he cringed internally, fighting the urge to bow his shoulders, lower his head and apologise. It wasn’t a look she usually turned on him, but for that moment he wished that it were even Jensen in the room instead. People often forgot just how focused and how strongly alpha Danneel was, and while she might cultivate it from their competition and their customers she didn’t like it from her co-workers. His nose still extra-sensitive from his heat the day before was picking up on her displeasure as well, and adding to his need to metaphorically roll over. Never one to over do it though, she blinked and let him go. “We need to be in peak shape for this meeting,” she said, her voice not revealing a hint of what had just happened. “All three of us need to be on the ball, and rolling with the punches.”
He nodded, mentally already psyching himself up, absurdly pleased that he hadn’t given in to the urge to apologise. The fact that he was an omega meant the contract negotiators often tried to focus their efforts on him rather than anyone else in the room, trying to get him to weaken, allow them to gain a foothold by interjecting their voice subtly with command-echos, and the more practice he had in ignoring them the better. “Sure. We should probably thrash out the section two details first.”
She bent her head over the relevant section that he pointed out and agreed. They’d been over this multiple times before, but it never hurt to cover the ground just once more. Before she left to collect her things, she grinned at him a bit cheekily. “If you’re playing Buzzword Bingo, I’ll be pissed if you’ve forgotten on the ball and rolling with the punches.” His face relaxed into a genuine smile.
His phone buzzed on the desk, nearly vibrating itself off. Catching it he read the text. “In the lobby. Andy.” Taking the elevator down he stared fixedly at the floor rather than his reflected face in front of him, pretending to be so engrossed in his shoes that he didn’t have room in his mind for anything else. Even in the short space of a minute away from his work and other people the intrusive thoughts were coming back, sending his blood pressure spiralling. He had to get over this, couldn’t let everything that reminded him of the biggest mistake of his life impinge on him.
Andy was bouncing impatiently on his toes by the time he arrived, a dry-cleaning bag over one shoulder and a drugstore bag in the other. He handed them to Jared who thanked him immediately and profusely. He had an hour before the meeting, plenty of time to get changed and properly cleaned up. He hadn’t bargained on Andy being quite so sharp though. He was staring at Jared pretty sharply. “Did you bond? he asked in a whisper.
Jared stared at him in shock. He hadn’t known himself until Jensen had told him. What on earth sort of signals was he sending out? Denial sprang automatically to his lips. “Of course not,” he said instantly. “Who would I bond with Why would I bond with anyone?” Aware of how frantic he sounded he shut up, cursing his inability to remain calm.
Andy raised an eyebrow. ”I can sense something different,” he said, leaving Jared to remember that Jesus fucking hell before bonding And had worked, as a therapist adjunct, his ability to project calm on a small scale, and to receive a limited range of emotions ranking him as a level five empath. Low enough, but more than sufficient to detect such a big change. Since his pairing, he’d ceased work of course, his gift mostly shut off by the fact that his bond now formed his primary emotional input. Andy watched him put it together. “Who is it?” he asked curiously.
Jared didn’t bother denying it anymore. “I’ll tell you everything when I get home,” he said. “I don’t have time right now. Thank you so much for bringing the suit I appreciate it more than I can say.” He backed towards the desk, leaving Andy obviously bursting with questions which couldn’t be answered.
Twenty minutes later, clean, be-suited and booted, he met up with Danneel and Jensen, studiously avoiding the latter’s eyes. He needn’t have bothered, Jensen’s eyes slid over him almost without registering his presence, a feeling Jared found himself disliking far more than their previous antagonism. Jensen didn’t get to dismiss him, to write him off as another slut omega only working until they found their mate. Danneel shot him a puzzled glance, and he consciously relaxed himself. Acting oddly would make her suspicious, and he didn’t want anyone in the office to know about this, not until he knew everything, his legal position, his rights, not until he’d sorted out with Jensen how they were going to fix this.
This finalisation meeting was the last in a long series, and Jensen had really grown to dislike the other companies team, in particular their nominal superior who’d introduced himself with the chummy words ‘call me Martin,’ and had proceeded to plow right on in, into trying to force a deal highly unbeneficial to Morgans, and designed it seemed, merely to raise his own credit in his own company. Jensen had christened the other man ‘slicker,’ though the nasty grin that hovered around his mouth as he said ‘no offence to slickers’ had made it clear it was an unsubtle dig at Jared as well.
It hadn’t helped him like the other man, that Martin had been first shocked then contemptuous of the fact that Jared was an Omega. It wasn’t like it was obvious after all, he was taller and stockier, than the general stereotype , he scrubbed well enough every morning and wore a heavy enough cologne that you couldn’t smell it off him, and hell he was wearing a suit and sitting in a boardroom. It hadn’t been obvious at least, until the other man had flicked through the documents and noticed the ‘O’ in Jared’s name. His ears burnt hot remembering it, the surprise and disdain that had accompanied the queried ‘Jare O adalecki, as though there was some mistake, some smudge that changed a B or an A into an O. Danneel had handled it, stepped smoothly into the awkward silence, asked if they had a problem, stared Martin down until he looked away, then looked at Jared kindly in a way that had almost humiliated him more than the ignorant fucker opposite him giving a dose of the disdain he was used to had. He hadn’t been able to muster much warm feeling for Mirrorlake after that, and he was taking a little bit of savage pleasure in eviscerating their accounts today. He could even muster the barest flicker of admiration for Jensen’s generally sandpapery managerial style.
At the end of the meeting with nearly every detail thrashed out, and only two points that needed serious discussion at their final meeting the very next day, Martin had stood and leaned forward to shake their hands, heading straight for Danneel first then Jensen, and hesitating a second before offering his hand to Jared who wished he could crush it with his own. For the sake of the deal he restrained himself, and shook the limp hand profered once before dropping it quickly, unnerved by the sharp sting of feeling he felt. He’d tested as almostly completely null psy at birth and then again at puberty (which had ironically raised fears from his parents that he wouldn’t be able to bond at all as complete nulls generally couldn’t regardless of their biology.) He wondered if he should get himself retested- a bond in unlikely circumstances, and now this. He was pretty sure he hadn’t been imagining the weird sensation, or the intense look in the other man’s eyes.
He was unsurprised when the other man asked if he could have a minute of his time. The rest left after a quick shake of hands all around, and he turned and faced Martin crossing his arms across his chest before he realised how defensive he looked. “Is there a problem?” he asked coolly. This had happened before. Alphas who didn’t think he should be in the room while a deal was going on, or who wanted to intimidate him for some unknown reason often pulled him aside to tell him what they thought of him. Even worse were the ones who tried to hit on him, or who had the nerve to complain about him not acting in the way they had expected. Being called into Jeff’s office because an outraged Alpha had complained at the underhand tactic of allowing an Omega in the room in an attempt to distract them from the point at hand had been a particular low point.
Martin smiled, a nasty twist of his lips. “I wanted to keep it strictly professional in here during the meeting,” he said, jerking his head at the room. “No need to let this jeopardise the deal after all. But I couldn’t help noticing that you’re registered as unbonded.”
Jared repressed an instinctive reaction to punch the other man. Omega status was a matter of public record, but it did require you actually bothering to go and look it up, and it was a shitty and intrusive thing to do. Cold as ice he replied. “What’s my status to you?”
“Nothing to me,” Martin replied smoothly. “I’m bonded already.” Like that wasn’t obvious, with the bonding bracelet showing just beneath one wankerish double cuff. “But I think it’d be of interest to your boss and the rest of your team that you haven’t declared your new bond. Can’t be bothered to file the waivers and announcement, or just too stupid? Did you think people wouldn't notice? The two of you are utterly and completely obvious, it was rolling off you like you'd only bonded this morning or something.” Jared was pretty sure that was an exaggeration. He'd already spotted that the bonding bracelet was marked with a empathy level five like Andy's. Martin paused as though to let Jared reply, and when met with silence he continued. “I’m sure I don’t need to remind you that it’s a civil offence not to amend your status immediately.”
Jared met his eyes with a level gaze. This was a new brand of bullshit. “What makes you think I haven’t?” he asked steadily. “Since you seem to be keeping yourself up to date with my life. It takes time to change papers and be registered after all.” There was a flicker of doubt in Martin’s eyes, and he continued. “As you said, let’s keep this strictly professional. I don’t need to explain anything to you, you’re not my boss, you’re not the city council, so keep the fuck out of this.” He injected the deliberate obscenity with every ounce of force he could muster, imbuing it with all the disdain he could manage while feeling cold and shocked inside.
It was obvious what Martin’s game was. What he was saying was technically true, a same-day registering of bond acknowledgement was standard, could be done by text, phone call, internet, but in practice there was lee-way, the actual ceremony didn’t have to take place for months, just the cursory registration and getting an ID bracelet. How he was saying it was a whole other matter, the implicit blackmail that lurked behind his words grating to the ears. It mattered to Jared, bonding meant a re-negotiation of your contract with your employer and a whole ton of things that didn’t matter to Jensen, and now the time he’d hoped to get things sorted out in was rapidly vanishing in front of his eyes.
There was a moment of tension where Martin leaned forward. “I’m not sure if you understand Jared,” he said, and his words were clear and cold. “Mirrorlake wants this deal, but we want it at 7% not 5%, and I can assure you that we will get it. This means more to your boss than you do, and if we pull out because there’s an irregular Omega fouling up the works with sloppy thinking, and even sloppier paperwork it’ll be your job at stake. Tomorrow, I expect you to have come round to our way of thinking on this.” He smiled with no warmth. “I’m sure you can get yourself all registered up tonight, but you know what that means.”
Two mandatory weeks off work, for doctor visits, the ceremony, the honeymoon and first heat as a bonded couple. The time most couples dreamed of with excitement, and planned meticulously for. Two weeks where not only would he be off the deal after every scrap of hard work he’d done to make it happen, but so would Jensen and despite his internal resolve not to quail, he couldn’t imagine the sort of shitstorm that would result from that. Something must have shown in his eyes because Martin gave a satisfied nod without another word, leaving Jared alone and irresolute in the room.
His common-sense told him to go to Jeff, even to Jensen or Danneel and tell them about this. It was blackmail of the worst sort and he knew they wouldn’t, couldn’t capitulate to it. But everything that Martin said held true. Him being unregistered was grounds for complaint, was grounds for Mirrorlake backing out of a deal that Morgans did need, while trumpeting the reason why far and wide. Him registering and avoiding that was impossible. But equally it seemed like forcing through a change in favour of the other company was impossible, and would throw his whole career into jeopardy.
Slowly he gathered up his papers and left the room. This day just kept getting shittier and shittier. Jensen leaning on the door-frame outside waiting for him wasn’t going to help matters either. He felt a tingle of desire and squashed it right down, grimly getting hold of himself. Being bonded was turning out to be a nightmare of epic proportions. He had seen the momentary flare in Jensen’s eyes as well, a moment of hot fire as quickly suppressed and replaced with the indolent look of dislike he sometimes affected. He pushed deliberately past, sucking in a breath as even that minor contact sharpened his senses. When they’d done sex education classes in school, they’d never mentioned this, never mentioned how proximity could alter your perceptions, and make you crave your mate. But then there hadn’t been much need probably. Most people wanted to fuck their partner all the time, not punch them in the face.
Jensen followed him, and Jared felt the hairs on the back of his neck prickle. "What do you want?" he demanded. He meant to sound firm and confrontational but he just sounded tired to his own ears.
Jensen passed him and stopped, turning around to face him. "We need to talk this through," he said, and his voice was exhausted as well. Looking closer Jared could see that the strain of the day had taken it's toll on Jensen also, his face fatigued and worn looking. He remembered as though from nowhere that you were meant to spend time close together after bonding, meant to lie in each others arms; savour the warmth and the closeness, and get used to the sensation knowing you'd do it for the rest of your natural life. He couldn't imagine cuddling Jensen, or being cuddled by him, couldn't imagine touching him without wanting to fuck or throw up. Not a bone of his body actually believed that one day the dry burning edge of need and dislike would dissipate into the companionship and soul-deep closeness shared by most couples.
He couldn't deny that this needed discussion though, in all fairness this affected Jensen nearly as much as it did him. "I know," he replied, complete weariness saturating him all of a sudden. It was all too hard to take in. Yesterday morning he'd been free, single, with a great job, working towards living a lifestyle his grandparents wouldn't even have been able to imagine, today he had a partner and his job was in jeopardy unless he betrayed his principles and still maybe then. "Come on. Let's go to my place." He knew what that entailed, knew how the night would probably end, but right now he was too tired to care.
Chapter Two