Intolerable Cruelty (Jensen/Jared, NC-17)
Title: Intolerable Cruelty
Author: stripysockette
Pairing(s): Jensen Ackles/Jared Padalecki
Rating: NC-17
Word count: 5500
Warnings/Kinks: Heat-sex, hate-sex, alpha/omega, dub-con
Summary: When your heat comes on you don't have a choice. You can end up fucking someone you hate- and accepting all the consequences.
Originally written for this prompt at spnkink-meme: http://spnkink-meme.livejournal.com/63218.html?thread=19580146t19580146
Jensen leaned against the door. “Nice save in that conference call,” he said, his voice as warm as his eyes were cold. Jared glanced up. That meant Jeff was about somewhere close. Catch Jensen saying something complimentary when there was no chance he’d be heard by the boss.
“Next time just get your figures right, and I won’t have to jump in,” he replied briefly, pitching his voice low. Their team was in enough trouble at the moment after losing the contract with HG Manufacturing, and finding out that their arrangement with Avida Supply was in jeopardy. It’d taken fast thinking on Jared’s part, and brutal charm on Jensen’s part to save even the shreds of the possibility of renewal. He might dislike the man from his gelled hair down to his handmade footwear, but the beta who’d taken their call had melted practically into his chair at the sight of his smile even over a videophone. There was seriously no accounting for taste.
His judgement was confirmed when Jensen leaned further into the room. “That’s about all you’re good for,” he said, and the viciousness stunned Jared for a moment. “Fucking the boss, and pencilling away at your figures and diagrams.”
The enmity surprises Jared for a second though really it shouldn’t. They’ve had a problem with each other since Jared was shifted sideways onto Jensen’s team, and had accidentally sidelined one of Jensen’s projects. Since then, every opportunity had been taken up with increasingly virulent remarks between them, but it hadn’t escalated as far as this in the office. Jensen was spoiling for a fight, Jared could smell it off him, waves of dislike and tense black anger, overlying the sickly sour smell of frustrated alpha. In an office with Jeffrey Dean Morgan around, no alpha had a chance to assert themselves. It usually wasn’t as clear as this, but Jared had been feeling hypersensitive for days.
He meets Jensen’s glare, with a calm look of his own, knowing how much it annoyed the other man, relishing the poor impulse control that Jensen always showed so clearly. “It really annoys you doesn’t it, “he said softly. “That an omega can do your job twice as well as you can, twice as fast and not actually think twice about whatever pathetic dick you’re hiding under those clothes. Just keep dreaming of Jeff’s dick Jensen, maybe someday he’ll fuck some manners into you, like he’s never had to do to me.” He looks back down at his paperwork, still smelling the fury that poured off Jensen. It was acid and brutal, and made him want to heave. Shit he thought silently. Shit, shit, shit.
When he looks back up, Jensen is gone and he breathes a sigh with relief. If he’s right, then he’s going to have to go home right now. He’s early, he knows that, curses his irregularity, damns the pills that should keep this from happening before he’s ready. They’re eighty percent effective, he just happens to be part of the seven percent that sometimes slide through the cracks. It makes him unhappy to have to ask for leave for this, to go home early, but the choice is that or staying and letting Jeff, Jensen, Daneel, that blond girl from Accounting all have a go at fucking him, and fighting each other, and he doesn’t think he could handle that. Less that he couldn’t handle the sex; it happened to everyone who went into accidental heat around an unmated alpha after all, and more that he couldn’t handle the gentle conversation with Jeff he’d be bound to have the next morning.
The one where he’d be told as softly as possible that it had been a bad idea to have an unregulated unbonded omega in the office, hardly conducive to team morale, and that he’d be assured of an excellent reference and bonus pay (like the law required, while still letting you hire and fire omegas as you wanted.)
He stood, and walked down the hallway to Jeff’s office. “I’m sorry sir, I really need to head home early,” he said, standing as still as he could manage. If he was this close without realising it, he knew Jeff was going to smell it as well, that first tinge of warmth, and he shouldn’t need to explain. Nor thankfully did he. Jeff nodded, murmured something about taking work back with him, not a word about sloppy medication habits, and Jared was inordinately grateful.
He was almost out of the room when Jeff stopped him. “We’re not going to fire you Jared,” he said, and the quiet stillness of that was like a cool pebble down in his back on a hot day. “I hired you because I believe you can be the best, and I still believe that. You don’t have to be frightened that if something goes wrong, you’ll be the first to go.” It’s bald and straightforward, and it makes sound business sense, and something in Jared wants to crumple in relief. He keeps his back straight and his knees locked though, because it’s part gratitude and partly the need to go bury his face right up close to Jeff’s neck.
“Thank you,” he says and hopes that will be enough. The next minute he’s out, and in the elevator, sagging against the wall, staring at himself in the mirror, at the tell-tale flush, the sweat, feeling the fear that catches him when this happens. It's come so fast, a moment ago he was just on the edge, sure that he'd had another hour, now he’s flushing. He thanks any God and none that he drives rather than takes public transport, as he comes up to the discreet grey saloon model.
Then with all the bad timing possible, Jensen is stepping out of the elevator into the underground carpark, with an armful of folders and an irritated expression, and Jesus the moron can’t take a hint. “You’re not sticking me with the prep-work for the Mirrorworks bid, just because your head hurts,” he bitches, and shoves the pile at Jared. It’s clearly then that his nose catches up with his brain, and there is a frozen moment. Jared has his keys clutched in his hand, the door open, so close to getting in and going, and Jensen looks ready to fling the papers to the ground and run himself. But this is undeniable, there is no choice about this, no way for them to avoid it, not when the surge of lethargic heat rolls through Jared, weakening his knees and hardening his cock, and every bit of him wants so badly.
It’s been a long time since he got properly fucked, a long long time, and he feels sick at the idea that it’s going to be Jensen, that there is no choice about this, that his ridiculous, expensive medication has proved useless, that already he can’t resist. His only leavening pleasure is that Jensen doesn’t want this either, doesn’t even like fucking omegas, prefers betas when he can get them. Doesn’t like getting himself ruffled and smeared, and can’t stand Jared. It’s almost funny. Almost.
Jared hasn’t gone into heat around an alpha for seven years. He’s been fucked since then, but heats he spends alone if he can't suppress them, jerking off frantically in ice cold showers, sliding dildos up his hole, sweating and shaking and shuddering, thinking about the paperwork that needs to be done, the exams that need to be taken, the life he’s going to lead outside of being a convenient hole, and sometimes the pure mundanity of his thoughts make him laugh as he fingers himself savagely again and again until every thought goes away in the final white heat of a passable orgasm.
Now though Jensen is up close and the fucker still smells bad to him. There’s the thick layer of alpha that’s making Jared wet, making his cock swell and his hole contract from the need to have something in it, and underneath that he smells the same as always, the smell Jared hates. But this is biology, this is inevitable and predetermined no matter how much they hate it, how much they loathe each other. It’s going to happen in the car he thinks vaguely, as he yanks off his shoes.
Jensen has other ideas, pulls him with burnings hands towards the security guard office that’s closed for his lunch break. He’s never in there. They’re in in a flash, Jensen barring the door, moving the desk in front of it, while Jared takes off his pants. “I don’t want the world to see me doing this,” Jensen says thickly, his pupils already dilated with need, his cock hard and thick, pressing against it’s confinement. “Don’t want anyone seeing me doing you,” and the dislike is still thick in his voice, like the sour undertone to his alpha scent.
There’s no kissing, and there’s still enough of Jared functional to be glad of that. Kissing is for long lazy afternoons with your lover, licking into their mouth, learning them, tasting them. It’s not for being thrust to the ground while an alpha you dislike strips hastily, anxious to get to the real business. His thighs are wet now, and he fights the urge to press them together in embarrassment. He always drips so much, his cock is almost as bad, hard and red against him, leaving a seeping pool of pre-cum on his stomach. Jensen isn’t helping, testing his control by unknotting his tie, unbuttoning his shirt, and Jesus Jared can’t wait for this fucker, gets his hand between his thighs and slides in a finger slickly, moans into it, arches up as he gets another one in, before Jensen is on him, rolling him with rough hands, tugging him up onto his knees, and talking, still talking.
“You fucking slut, spreading your legs like that for any cock you can get. Knew I was right about you, knew you’ll do anything to get ahead. ” The ramblings become almost nonsensical, disconnected sentences as Jensen fingers him, slipping in so easily because Jared’s hole wants him so much, opens wide for him easily, wants something to clench against, and half of what Jensen is saying is objectively true because yeah Jared wants this, wants this like he wants food after a gym session, wants air for breathing, wants every necessity that he’s never thought about.
Jensen is up to three fingers in seconds, and Jared is moments away from begging to be fucked, because for a dude so confident about his dick, Jensen isn’t using it much. Then a fourth finger slides in, and he can feel himself pulsing around them, and it feels so good he wants to cry. Such a fucking pity these hands are attached to such an asshole. “God you’re so wet,” Jensen says, and his voice is a tangled mixture of disgust and lust, but mostly lust, and the way his fingers sink in time after time makes it clear what’s winning out, what will always win out.
“You kiss your mother with that mouth?” Jared asked, leaning his forehead on his sweaty arms, pushing back to get the fingers in deeper, letting his mouth fall open as he feels Jensen’s thumb brush up against the rest of his fingers. Every bone in his body recoils with the force of no he feels at letting this man’s hand inside his body, but his blood shivers hot and yes, and he’s left panting, poised on the edge of ‘no,’ as Jensen slides out every finger, and fumbles with a condom. A wave of acidic fury crashes against Jared’s logical mind. He should be grateful, he knows that, Jensen sleeps around enough to have picked up any number of infections, but all he can think of is the idea that this is Jensen denying him.
“No. She wasn’t a bitch omega like you,” Jensen said through gritted teeth. Jared’s laugh has a hitch to it now, an edge of a sob as he replied to the taunt.
“A bitch omega whose got you panting like a dog Ackles. You’re like every other fucking Alpha in the world, one sniff and where’s that higher brain function gone.” The last word tailed off into a moan, heat flushing through him like a renewed surge, rendering him incapable of even thinking let alone talking. He could tell Jensen felt it as well, because his cock was nudged up tight against his hole, no more teasing, or taunting, just fierce brutal thrusts that brought him right up close to the edge of pain, because yeah Jensen’s cock was big, and his ass wanted it too badly was clenching tighter in anticipation.
Even with the excess lube he was producing it was a tight fit, and Jared breathed shallowly as Jensen fucked him through it, tight spare thrusts now, centred nowhere near his prostrate, because Jensen was a selfish bastard even by accident, but his own cock was still achingly hard, and fierce ripples of pleasure were shooting up his spine, spreading through him. This was what it was like to get fucked in heat, and yeah it had been too long. He’d already figured he’d be jerking himself off through this one, and another cold shiver of dislike ripped through the dazed heat, as he fitted one hand around his cock and began stripping it swiftly, on one level just desperate to come, desperate to feel Jensen shudder into him, on another hoping to get this finished and done with.
“Stop it,” growled Jensen, voice distorted and thick with pleasure, and Jared felt the accumulated force of thousands of years worth of instinct go through him. When an alpha told you to do something, you did it and fast. For your survival, for your safety, your food, your fucking. His hand stilled on his cock without thought. Then as the initial fear died away, the voice that had driven him through school, through university, through every job interview where an alpha or a beta had offered to let him get on his knees and show them why he deserved the position, made its appearance, and for the first time Jared let it speak out loud for him.
“Fuck you.” He’d be damned if this man, alpha or not told him what to do, not on the Mirrorlake bid, and not here. His hand went back to his cock, despite every instinct screaming at him DANGER. Jensen pulled fully out, and slammed back in as hard as he could, balls up against him, bottomed out, and Jared almost wailed. Trust the bastard to get his prostrate on that occasion. Thick pleasure was crawling through his limbs now, the will to defy was ebbing away with every spark that flashed through him, and his hand almost dropped as Jensen shifted and caught the same place inside him. He was so close to coming now, his hand lifeless on his cock, the thick heavy weight of Jensen’s dick, stretching him open, the scent of alpha hormones surrounding him, choking him with the need to submit, to spread even wider, let Jensen take whatever he wanted, and when Jensen viciously thrust again he felt himself jerk, more precome leaking onto the floor beneath him. Jensen’s teeth fastened onto the back of his neck, and Jared felt the hot burn of them dig in, felt himself coming from the promise of that, the promise of being owned and taken and had in every way possible, coming with a shout and a gush of come that still had the power to embarrass him. With a flare of silent exultation he realised his hand was still on his own dick, that in those last seconds he’d held on, and from Jensen’s growl, he realised it as well.
It was only a few more thrusts til Jensen was finished, and he rolled away immediately, staring in silent disdain at Jared, the raised lip snarl clearly struggling to catalogue an omega who wasn’t responsive enough. Jared bore the scrutiny, rejoicing in the silent victory. Fuck him and all he stood for. This had been a once off, an accident, and it had proved what he thought, that however good Alphas were at fucking, it wasn’t enough. It bolstered his pride as he clambered back into his clothing, wincing as the material met his sticky ass and legs, already sore all over, his hole aching from the memory of having been so recently filled. He purposefully avoided looking at Jensen as he left on wobbly legs filled with satisfaction, and a strange aching hollow round his heart that he couldn’t explain.
The next morning he felt heavy and jittery when he woke. There was no need for coffee to wake him up, his whole body felt on red alert as though tensing for a blow to come. He hadn’t felt like this the when he’d fucked during heat before, he’d felt satiated, fucked out and lazy to his bones. Of course he’d also woken up next to her after a whole night, and she’d turned and giggled and gently bit him exactly where she had the night before. He smiled wistfully at the memory.
Despite how good things had been with Gen, the bonding hadn’t taken. They’d tried more than once, but eventually had to concede that their chemistry wasn’t matching up. Bonding was like that sometimes, the person you thought you should be with didn’t click. If you were lucky your prospective bonder found someone else fast, that way you could be friends without the risk of jealousy. At least not on Gen’s part, Jared still suffered the occasional painful pang when he saw how happy they were together, how they'd bonded on the first try.
He piled together the folders Jensen had thrust at him last night, not having had the chance to go through them properly, mind still glazed from what had happened in the carpark, and checked his wallet and keys were in his pocket. He was off heat once again, however badly his body failed at metabolizing heat suppressants, he was still one of the lucky ones who were only in heat for a day. Three showers had taken care of the rest, and a good scrub down to his pores to get rid of the lingering smell of Jensen. Now he only smelled of fresh mint, not a trace of alpha, and he sighed, suddenly aware of what a relief it was not to have to smell Jensen all over him. He’d had to throw away the boxers and pants he’d worn home last night soaked and stained as they had been.
While parking the car, he firmly averted his eyes from the security guard’s office, and hurried up to the fifth floor. Getting into work early was essential today, after an episode like yesterday he had to be the best employee he could to make it up, even if Jeff had promised him his job was safe. Jeff himself was in early and nodded at him. “Good stuff Jared, nice to see people being keen. We need to get this Mirrorlake bid in as fast as possible, so it’s all hands to the pump on your team today.” He drank his coffee and sighed with satisfaction. “I like your ideas of tackling their distribution problems, keep up the good work,” he added.
Jared walked away, supremely grateful that he’d somehow lucked out with his boss, even if he had an asshole co-worker like Jensen. Somewhere between getting his first cup of coffee and getting back to his desk though, the sickness hit, and he bent over in shock, feeling the tremors run through him, only just holding onto the coffee. Back at his desk, he clutched at the first pen that came to hand and stared at the paper in front of him blankly. He couldn’t have a second day off, not so soon after the first, when all he had was an upset stomach. Taking deep calming breaths he brought himself back to focus. He hadn’t eaten, that was all it was.
A Kitkat bar in the top drawer of his desk looked at him enticingly, and mechanically he began to eat, forcing the sickness away, letting the caffeine revive him gradually. By the time everyone else began trickling in, the sickness was almost gone. He still didn’t feel well though, the tips of his fingers were ice cold, and the jittery feeling from the early morning was back and stronger than ever, thrumming through him, like the beat of some ominous drum. He tried to ignore it, until he realised he’d read the same paragraph four times and still not taken a word in. Re-concentrating he continued to read, marking up the paper as he went, taking comfort in the familiarity. This was what he’d been trained for, this was what he was good at. Jeff knew that, who cared what Jensen thought.
When the second wave of sickness went through him, he lunged straight for the waste-paper basket, on his knees letting the sickness shudder through him, though nothing came up. Just nausea then. That was bad enough. His nose twitched as he caught scent of something at once delicious and repulsive coming nearer to him. When the person halted outside his cubicle door, Jared stared at it puzzled. The smell was Jensen, the same metallic tang that always surrounded him, the same heavy scent of alpha (a little less frustrated though,) the same smell that always made Jared want to wrinkle his nose in distaste at the way some alphas really let it all hang out. Yet overlaid on it was the same smell from yesterday, the same lust and anger twined together, yet even sharper to his nose and oddly compelling.
He realised he was breathing faster, and that his dick had stirred under the desk in a way that made him want to cut it off. Already he could feel traces of lube wetting his hole, and he shivered in distaste. Some remnant of heat left over he told himself, it meant absolutely nothing. It was much weaker thankfully, enough to make him want a cock pounding into him, not enough to make him let it be Jensen. The knock on the door also puzzled him. Jensen usually barged in with no regard for manners. “Come in,” he called, surprised at just how steady his voice sounded.
Jensen came in, expression devoid of his usual dislike and contempt, and closed the door behind him, looking at him dispassionately before dragging a filing cabinet in front of it. Jared’s hand shot straight for the phone, omegas might not have full legal protections in their jobs, but this was intimidation and harassment. One fuck probably had Jensen thinking Jared would be begging to suck his cock. To his disgust, he found the thought didn’t sound so bad, not when he knew first hand what Jensen’s cock was like. That thought disappeared the instant he actually looked at Jensen though, and felt the old familiar dislike roil through him.
Jensen seemed to have anticipated that though, he almost growled “no,” and much like the night before, Jared’s hand stopped. With immense effort he made himself pick up the phone, worst-case scenarios running through his head. If he didn’t get help now, if he didn’t dial security, if he let Jensen do whatever he’d come here to do, then he might as well sign away his chance of making a life for himself in this company forever. The next second the choice was taken away from him, Jensen had snatched the phone and contemptuously tossed it to one side. This close, the smell was overwhelming, it made his mouth water and his hole leak, and his eyes fix on pants that had been probably fit perfectly normally this morning on Jensen, but that were now stretched to capacity by his hard dick.
He dragged his eyes upwards, unsure of what exactly was going to happen. He was taller than Jensen, probably stronger, he knew that dispassionately. That didn’t mean he could take him in a fight, could stop him from doing whatever the fuck this was, not when Jensen could tell him to go limp, and it’d take him whole seconds to fight past the alpha-ness. But Jensen didn’t seem to be making a move, just seemed to be breathing wide eyed and almost frightened looking.
“Stop looking at me like that,” Jensen said in a voice that Jared had never heard from him before, a voice strained tight and breaking as though it was taking some immense effort for Jensen to spit out his words. “I’m not going to fucking rape you.” Jared glanced away, he hadn’t known that it was that clear in his eyes what he’d thought was going to happen, that is was what he’d been steeling himself for, in the knowledge that if he cried out, if he shouted for help, it’d be his job on the line, his reputation, his everything. Who was going to believe that he wasn’t in heat, that whatever this was it wasn’t just fluctuations? Everyone knew about how kindly employers looked upon omegas who neglected to regulate themself in the workplace after all.
Jensen was staring at him still when he looked back. “What’s going on Jensen?” he asked, and again was amazed at how cool and calm his voice was, as though there was nothing unusual going on, just two co-workers shooting the breeze together.
“It’s you, you whore,” said Jensen, and that word in his mouth was poison. “You fucking omega coming into this building, irregular as shit, forcing this on me when I hate you, when the thought of sticking my dick in you makes me want to puke, except when it makes me want to come. This is your fault, you bastard, your fault.” His hands are shaking now, and Jared begins to feel a terrible thought blossoming in his mind.
“I don’t understand,” he says numbly, except he thinks that he’s beginning to, everything dropping into place, clicking together one by one, because life was unfair as anything, and he looks up at Jensen who is now leaning down so close he can see the brown and grey flecks in his green eyes, and who seems to have lost patience because he’s hauling Jared up against the desk turning him round, and running fingers that seemed more clinical than lustful down the back of his pants to press against the open swell of his wet hole.
“You’re not in heat are you,” said Jensen and it sounded like he was going to break, almost going to cry, and wouldn’t that be a shocker, alpha Jensen in tears over an omega, the sarcastic side of him that never stops thinks quietly. He shakes his head, shortly once, and Jensen continues. “I know you don’t like me, don’t want to fuck me, so it isn’t like this is voluntary. And I sure as hell don’t want to fuck you when I’m more than five feet away from you, so this is obvious.”
Jared stilled completely, still terribly aware of Jensen’s hand down his pants, the unconscious twitches against him that were driving him mad, but fighting it to think clearly, think rationally. “We’re bonded aren’t we,” he whispers, and the whole day makes sense. The sickness as his body recalibrated itself, the way Jensen smelt so good, why he felt like he was in heat just because this particular alpha was in the same room. The word reverberated in his head. Bonded. “Jesus,” he said, and just about restrained himself from throwing up. Months of trying with Gen, hoping each heat that this was the time, and now from one quick accidental throw away fuck he’s tied with this bastard, legally and physically. He starts to shake, slow terrible tremors that run through his body, that he recognises vaguely as fear.
Things are better now than they have ever been before, there are safeguards, protections, legal remedies for omegas bonded to alphas, but there is no undoing, there is no stopping, there is no release. And despite everything, despite all the progress, Jared had never wanted this, never wanted the sort of alpha so many omegas dreamed of. He’d wanted Gen when they’d been together, because she was Gen, not because she was an alpha. The idea of being with Jensen for life, not fucking anyone else, not having anyone else close to him ever for fear that their scent would trigger possessive behaviour, no lover who he wanted and cherished, not even someone he could tolerate was horrifying enough, the idea that when he was close enough he wouldn’t care about that, that when he was in heat he would beg for it, beg to be fucked because his body demanded that his alpha fulfil it, was even worse. That nothing else would satisfy him in that moment than Jensen’s cock.
He understands now why Jensen had sounded close to breaking point, understands clinically that this isn’t exactly Jensen’s idea of a match either, but can’t bring himself to care, not when his life flickers so horrifically before his eyes. All he can find to cling onto is that Jensen is a bastard, a jerk of the highest order, whose made it clear from day one that he didn’t think omegas should be working in the same building as him (didn’t even think they were for fucking either, not for him and his taste in steady competent betas,) but he isn’t a rapist. He isn’t a bad person. He clings onto those shreds of hope, that something can be salvaged from this, that while their bonding may never be sexless (can never be sexless,) that he’ll be allowed to retain at least some of his life, and realises dully that this is going to be his life from now on.
That he’ll constantly grasp at threads of hope, that he’ll take what scraps he can get of decency from a man he loathes. That he’ll have to second guess every single thing that ever happens to him, have to work doubly hard not only to make it at work, but actively against a partner he doesn’t want and who doesn’t want him, and who in some ways is justified in loathing him so much. It had been an accident, a confluence of events, but it had been his heat that had triggered the sex, his heat that had led to a bond neither of them wanted, and the futility of it all, struck him like a weight. Everything he’d worked for, for so many years, every heat he’d spent in his apartment alone fucking himself rather than looking for a bond, and all of it come to waste.
It runs through his mind in seconds, even as he’s dimly aware of Jensen breathing raggedly as he waits for him to come to the obvious conclusion, that there is nothing to do but accept this, to give in and let it happen. There was no choice, he could leave, he could run, and every heat he’d have in the rest of his shortened life would be agonising, every fibre would call out, and Jensen would be justified in preservation of his own life in seeking him, in bringing him back and forcing him to accede. He felt the truth of everything he was thinking, and slowly, letting Jensen see what he was doing, he pushes back, slides down his boxers and his pants and steps out of them, bends over until his arms rest on the desk and his face is inches away from the paperwork he’d been working on, and lets Jensen fuck him joylessly until they both come.
Sequel here
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Regardless of when you're reading this, feedback/crit always appreciated.
Author: stripysockette
Pairing(s): Jensen Ackles/Jared Padalecki
Rating: NC-17
Word count: 5500
Warnings/Kinks: Heat-sex, hate-sex, alpha/omega, dub-con
Summary: When your heat comes on you don't have a choice. You can end up fucking someone you hate- and accepting all the consequences.
Originally written for this prompt at spnkink-meme: http://spnkink-meme.livejournal.com/63218.html?thread=19580146t19580146
Jensen leaned against the door. “Nice save in that conference call,” he said, his voice as warm as his eyes were cold. Jared glanced up. That meant Jeff was about somewhere close. Catch Jensen saying something complimentary when there was no chance he’d be heard by the boss.
“Next time just get your figures right, and I won’t have to jump in,” he replied briefly, pitching his voice low. Their team was in enough trouble at the moment after losing the contract with HG Manufacturing, and finding out that their arrangement with Avida Supply was in jeopardy. It’d taken fast thinking on Jared’s part, and brutal charm on Jensen’s part to save even the shreds of the possibility of renewal. He might dislike the man from his gelled hair down to his handmade footwear, but the beta who’d taken their call had melted practically into his chair at the sight of his smile even over a videophone. There was seriously no accounting for taste.
His judgement was confirmed when Jensen leaned further into the room. “That’s about all you’re good for,” he said, and the viciousness stunned Jared for a moment. “Fucking the boss, and pencilling away at your figures and diagrams.”
The enmity surprises Jared for a second though really it shouldn’t. They’ve had a problem with each other since Jared was shifted sideways onto Jensen’s team, and had accidentally sidelined one of Jensen’s projects. Since then, every opportunity had been taken up with increasingly virulent remarks between them, but it hadn’t escalated as far as this in the office. Jensen was spoiling for a fight, Jared could smell it off him, waves of dislike and tense black anger, overlying the sickly sour smell of frustrated alpha. In an office with Jeffrey Dean Morgan around, no alpha had a chance to assert themselves. It usually wasn’t as clear as this, but Jared had been feeling hypersensitive for days.
He meets Jensen’s glare, with a calm look of his own, knowing how much it annoyed the other man, relishing the poor impulse control that Jensen always showed so clearly. “It really annoys you doesn’t it, “he said softly. “That an omega can do your job twice as well as you can, twice as fast and not actually think twice about whatever pathetic dick you’re hiding under those clothes. Just keep dreaming of Jeff’s dick Jensen, maybe someday he’ll fuck some manners into you, like he’s never had to do to me.” He looks back down at his paperwork, still smelling the fury that poured off Jensen. It was acid and brutal, and made him want to heave. Shit he thought silently. Shit, shit, shit.
When he looks back up, Jensen is gone and he breathes a sigh with relief. If he’s right, then he’s going to have to go home right now. He’s early, he knows that, curses his irregularity, damns the pills that should keep this from happening before he’s ready. They’re eighty percent effective, he just happens to be part of the seven percent that sometimes slide through the cracks. It makes him unhappy to have to ask for leave for this, to go home early, but the choice is that or staying and letting Jeff, Jensen, Daneel, that blond girl from Accounting all have a go at fucking him, and fighting each other, and he doesn’t think he could handle that. Less that he couldn’t handle the sex; it happened to everyone who went into accidental heat around an unmated alpha after all, and more that he couldn’t handle the gentle conversation with Jeff he’d be bound to have the next morning.
The one where he’d be told as softly as possible that it had been a bad idea to have an unregulated unbonded omega in the office, hardly conducive to team morale, and that he’d be assured of an excellent reference and bonus pay (like the law required, while still letting you hire and fire omegas as you wanted.)
He stood, and walked down the hallway to Jeff’s office. “I’m sorry sir, I really need to head home early,” he said, standing as still as he could manage. If he was this close without realising it, he knew Jeff was going to smell it as well, that first tinge of warmth, and he shouldn’t need to explain. Nor thankfully did he. Jeff nodded, murmured something about taking work back with him, not a word about sloppy medication habits, and Jared was inordinately grateful.
He was almost out of the room when Jeff stopped him. “We’re not going to fire you Jared,” he said, and the quiet stillness of that was like a cool pebble down in his back on a hot day. “I hired you because I believe you can be the best, and I still believe that. You don’t have to be frightened that if something goes wrong, you’ll be the first to go.” It’s bald and straightforward, and it makes sound business sense, and something in Jared wants to crumple in relief. He keeps his back straight and his knees locked though, because it’s part gratitude and partly the need to go bury his face right up close to Jeff’s neck.
“Thank you,” he says and hopes that will be enough. The next minute he’s out, and in the elevator, sagging against the wall, staring at himself in the mirror, at the tell-tale flush, the sweat, feeling the fear that catches him when this happens. It's come so fast, a moment ago he was just on the edge, sure that he'd had another hour, now he’s flushing. He thanks any God and none that he drives rather than takes public transport, as he comes up to the discreet grey saloon model.
Then with all the bad timing possible, Jensen is stepping out of the elevator into the underground carpark, with an armful of folders and an irritated expression, and Jesus the moron can’t take a hint. “You’re not sticking me with the prep-work for the Mirrorworks bid, just because your head hurts,” he bitches, and shoves the pile at Jared. It’s clearly then that his nose catches up with his brain, and there is a frozen moment. Jared has his keys clutched in his hand, the door open, so close to getting in and going, and Jensen looks ready to fling the papers to the ground and run himself. But this is undeniable, there is no choice about this, no way for them to avoid it, not when the surge of lethargic heat rolls through Jared, weakening his knees and hardening his cock, and every bit of him wants so badly.
It’s been a long time since he got properly fucked, a long long time, and he feels sick at the idea that it’s going to be Jensen, that there is no choice about this, that his ridiculous, expensive medication has proved useless, that already he can’t resist. His only leavening pleasure is that Jensen doesn’t want this either, doesn’t even like fucking omegas, prefers betas when he can get them. Doesn’t like getting himself ruffled and smeared, and can’t stand Jared. It’s almost funny. Almost.
Jared hasn’t gone into heat around an alpha for seven years. He’s been fucked since then, but heats he spends alone if he can't suppress them, jerking off frantically in ice cold showers, sliding dildos up his hole, sweating and shaking and shuddering, thinking about the paperwork that needs to be done, the exams that need to be taken, the life he’s going to lead outside of being a convenient hole, and sometimes the pure mundanity of his thoughts make him laugh as he fingers himself savagely again and again until every thought goes away in the final white heat of a passable orgasm.
Now though Jensen is up close and the fucker still smells bad to him. There’s the thick layer of alpha that’s making Jared wet, making his cock swell and his hole contract from the need to have something in it, and underneath that he smells the same as always, the smell Jared hates. But this is biology, this is inevitable and predetermined no matter how much they hate it, how much they loathe each other. It’s going to happen in the car he thinks vaguely, as he yanks off his shoes.
Jensen has other ideas, pulls him with burnings hands towards the security guard office that’s closed for his lunch break. He’s never in there. They’re in in a flash, Jensen barring the door, moving the desk in front of it, while Jared takes off his pants. “I don’t want the world to see me doing this,” Jensen says thickly, his pupils already dilated with need, his cock hard and thick, pressing against it’s confinement. “Don’t want anyone seeing me doing you,” and the dislike is still thick in his voice, like the sour undertone to his alpha scent.
There’s no kissing, and there’s still enough of Jared functional to be glad of that. Kissing is for long lazy afternoons with your lover, licking into their mouth, learning them, tasting them. It’s not for being thrust to the ground while an alpha you dislike strips hastily, anxious to get to the real business. His thighs are wet now, and he fights the urge to press them together in embarrassment. He always drips so much, his cock is almost as bad, hard and red against him, leaving a seeping pool of pre-cum on his stomach. Jensen isn’t helping, testing his control by unknotting his tie, unbuttoning his shirt, and Jesus Jared can’t wait for this fucker, gets his hand between his thighs and slides in a finger slickly, moans into it, arches up as he gets another one in, before Jensen is on him, rolling him with rough hands, tugging him up onto his knees, and talking, still talking.
“You fucking slut, spreading your legs like that for any cock you can get. Knew I was right about you, knew you’ll do anything to get ahead. ” The ramblings become almost nonsensical, disconnected sentences as Jensen fingers him, slipping in so easily because Jared’s hole wants him so much, opens wide for him easily, wants something to clench against, and half of what Jensen is saying is objectively true because yeah Jared wants this, wants this like he wants food after a gym session, wants air for breathing, wants every necessity that he’s never thought about.
Jensen is up to three fingers in seconds, and Jared is moments away from begging to be fucked, because for a dude so confident about his dick, Jensen isn’t using it much. Then a fourth finger slides in, and he can feel himself pulsing around them, and it feels so good he wants to cry. Such a fucking pity these hands are attached to such an asshole. “God you’re so wet,” Jensen says, and his voice is a tangled mixture of disgust and lust, but mostly lust, and the way his fingers sink in time after time makes it clear what’s winning out, what will always win out.
“You kiss your mother with that mouth?” Jared asked, leaning his forehead on his sweaty arms, pushing back to get the fingers in deeper, letting his mouth fall open as he feels Jensen’s thumb brush up against the rest of his fingers. Every bone in his body recoils with the force of no he feels at letting this man’s hand inside his body, but his blood shivers hot and yes, and he’s left panting, poised on the edge of ‘no,’ as Jensen slides out every finger, and fumbles with a condom. A wave of acidic fury crashes against Jared’s logical mind. He should be grateful, he knows that, Jensen sleeps around enough to have picked up any number of infections, but all he can think of is the idea that this is Jensen denying him.
“No. She wasn’t a bitch omega like you,” Jensen said through gritted teeth. Jared’s laugh has a hitch to it now, an edge of a sob as he replied to the taunt.
“A bitch omega whose got you panting like a dog Ackles. You’re like every other fucking Alpha in the world, one sniff and where’s that higher brain function gone.” The last word tailed off into a moan, heat flushing through him like a renewed surge, rendering him incapable of even thinking let alone talking. He could tell Jensen felt it as well, because his cock was nudged up tight against his hole, no more teasing, or taunting, just fierce brutal thrusts that brought him right up close to the edge of pain, because yeah Jensen’s cock was big, and his ass wanted it too badly was clenching tighter in anticipation.
Even with the excess lube he was producing it was a tight fit, and Jared breathed shallowly as Jensen fucked him through it, tight spare thrusts now, centred nowhere near his prostrate, because Jensen was a selfish bastard even by accident, but his own cock was still achingly hard, and fierce ripples of pleasure were shooting up his spine, spreading through him. This was what it was like to get fucked in heat, and yeah it had been too long. He’d already figured he’d be jerking himself off through this one, and another cold shiver of dislike ripped through the dazed heat, as he fitted one hand around his cock and began stripping it swiftly, on one level just desperate to come, desperate to feel Jensen shudder into him, on another hoping to get this finished and done with.
“Stop it,” growled Jensen, voice distorted and thick with pleasure, and Jared felt the accumulated force of thousands of years worth of instinct go through him. When an alpha told you to do something, you did it and fast. For your survival, for your safety, your food, your fucking. His hand stilled on his cock without thought. Then as the initial fear died away, the voice that had driven him through school, through university, through every job interview where an alpha or a beta had offered to let him get on his knees and show them why he deserved the position, made its appearance, and for the first time Jared let it speak out loud for him.
“Fuck you.” He’d be damned if this man, alpha or not told him what to do, not on the Mirrorlake bid, and not here. His hand went back to his cock, despite every instinct screaming at him DANGER. Jensen pulled fully out, and slammed back in as hard as he could, balls up against him, bottomed out, and Jared almost wailed. Trust the bastard to get his prostrate on that occasion. Thick pleasure was crawling through his limbs now, the will to defy was ebbing away with every spark that flashed through him, and his hand almost dropped as Jensen shifted and caught the same place inside him. He was so close to coming now, his hand lifeless on his cock, the thick heavy weight of Jensen’s dick, stretching him open, the scent of alpha hormones surrounding him, choking him with the need to submit, to spread even wider, let Jensen take whatever he wanted, and when Jensen viciously thrust again he felt himself jerk, more precome leaking onto the floor beneath him. Jensen’s teeth fastened onto the back of his neck, and Jared felt the hot burn of them dig in, felt himself coming from the promise of that, the promise of being owned and taken and had in every way possible, coming with a shout and a gush of come that still had the power to embarrass him. With a flare of silent exultation he realised his hand was still on his own dick, that in those last seconds he’d held on, and from Jensen’s growl, he realised it as well.
It was only a few more thrusts til Jensen was finished, and he rolled away immediately, staring in silent disdain at Jared, the raised lip snarl clearly struggling to catalogue an omega who wasn’t responsive enough. Jared bore the scrutiny, rejoicing in the silent victory. Fuck him and all he stood for. This had been a once off, an accident, and it had proved what he thought, that however good Alphas were at fucking, it wasn’t enough. It bolstered his pride as he clambered back into his clothing, wincing as the material met his sticky ass and legs, already sore all over, his hole aching from the memory of having been so recently filled. He purposefully avoided looking at Jensen as he left on wobbly legs filled with satisfaction, and a strange aching hollow round his heart that he couldn’t explain.
The next morning he felt heavy and jittery when he woke. There was no need for coffee to wake him up, his whole body felt on red alert as though tensing for a blow to come. He hadn’t felt like this the when he’d fucked during heat before, he’d felt satiated, fucked out and lazy to his bones. Of course he’d also woken up next to her after a whole night, and she’d turned and giggled and gently bit him exactly where she had the night before. He smiled wistfully at the memory.
Despite how good things had been with Gen, the bonding hadn’t taken. They’d tried more than once, but eventually had to concede that their chemistry wasn’t matching up. Bonding was like that sometimes, the person you thought you should be with didn’t click. If you were lucky your prospective bonder found someone else fast, that way you could be friends without the risk of jealousy. At least not on Gen’s part, Jared still suffered the occasional painful pang when he saw how happy they were together, how they'd bonded on the first try.
He piled together the folders Jensen had thrust at him last night, not having had the chance to go through them properly, mind still glazed from what had happened in the carpark, and checked his wallet and keys were in his pocket. He was off heat once again, however badly his body failed at metabolizing heat suppressants, he was still one of the lucky ones who were only in heat for a day. Three showers had taken care of the rest, and a good scrub down to his pores to get rid of the lingering smell of Jensen. Now he only smelled of fresh mint, not a trace of alpha, and he sighed, suddenly aware of what a relief it was not to have to smell Jensen all over him. He’d had to throw away the boxers and pants he’d worn home last night soaked and stained as they had been.
While parking the car, he firmly averted his eyes from the security guard’s office, and hurried up to the fifth floor. Getting into work early was essential today, after an episode like yesterday he had to be the best employee he could to make it up, even if Jeff had promised him his job was safe. Jeff himself was in early and nodded at him. “Good stuff Jared, nice to see people being keen. We need to get this Mirrorlake bid in as fast as possible, so it’s all hands to the pump on your team today.” He drank his coffee and sighed with satisfaction. “I like your ideas of tackling their distribution problems, keep up the good work,” he added.
Jared walked away, supremely grateful that he’d somehow lucked out with his boss, even if he had an asshole co-worker like Jensen. Somewhere between getting his first cup of coffee and getting back to his desk though, the sickness hit, and he bent over in shock, feeling the tremors run through him, only just holding onto the coffee. Back at his desk, he clutched at the first pen that came to hand and stared at the paper in front of him blankly. He couldn’t have a second day off, not so soon after the first, when all he had was an upset stomach. Taking deep calming breaths he brought himself back to focus. He hadn’t eaten, that was all it was.
A Kitkat bar in the top drawer of his desk looked at him enticingly, and mechanically he began to eat, forcing the sickness away, letting the caffeine revive him gradually. By the time everyone else began trickling in, the sickness was almost gone. He still didn’t feel well though, the tips of his fingers were ice cold, and the jittery feeling from the early morning was back and stronger than ever, thrumming through him, like the beat of some ominous drum. He tried to ignore it, until he realised he’d read the same paragraph four times and still not taken a word in. Re-concentrating he continued to read, marking up the paper as he went, taking comfort in the familiarity. This was what he’d been trained for, this was what he was good at. Jeff knew that, who cared what Jensen thought.
When the second wave of sickness went through him, he lunged straight for the waste-paper basket, on his knees letting the sickness shudder through him, though nothing came up. Just nausea then. That was bad enough. His nose twitched as he caught scent of something at once delicious and repulsive coming nearer to him. When the person halted outside his cubicle door, Jared stared at it puzzled. The smell was Jensen, the same metallic tang that always surrounded him, the same heavy scent of alpha (a little less frustrated though,) the same smell that always made Jared want to wrinkle his nose in distaste at the way some alphas really let it all hang out. Yet overlaid on it was the same smell from yesterday, the same lust and anger twined together, yet even sharper to his nose and oddly compelling.
He realised he was breathing faster, and that his dick had stirred under the desk in a way that made him want to cut it off. Already he could feel traces of lube wetting his hole, and he shivered in distaste. Some remnant of heat left over he told himself, it meant absolutely nothing. It was much weaker thankfully, enough to make him want a cock pounding into him, not enough to make him let it be Jensen. The knock on the door also puzzled him. Jensen usually barged in with no regard for manners. “Come in,” he called, surprised at just how steady his voice sounded.
Jensen came in, expression devoid of his usual dislike and contempt, and closed the door behind him, looking at him dispassionately before dragging a filing cabinet in front of it. Jared’s hand shot straight for the phone, omegas might not have full legal protections in their jobs, but this was intimidation and harassment. One fuck probably had Jensen thinking Jared would be begging to suck his cock. To his disgust, he found the thought didn’t sound so bad, not when he knew first hand what Jensen’s cock was like. That thought disappeared the instant he actually looked at Jensen though, and felt the old familiar dislike roil through him.
Jensen seemed to have anticipated that though, he almost growled “no,” and much like the night before, Jared’s hand stopped. With immense effort he made himself pick up the phone, worst-case scenarios running through his head. If he didn’t get help now, if he didn’t dial security, if he let Jensen do whatever he’d come here to do, then he might as well sign away his chance of making a life for himself in this company forever. The next second the choice was taken away from him, Jensen had snatched the phone and contemptuously tossed it to one side. This close, the smell was overwhelming, it made his mouth water and his hole leak, and his eyes fix on pants that had been probably fit perfectly normally this morning on Jensen, but that were now stretched to capacity by his hard dick.
He dragged his eyes upwards, unsure of what exactly was going to happen. He was taller than Jensen, probably stronger, he knew that dispassionately. That didn’t mean he could take him in a fight, could stop him from doing whatever the fuck this was, not when Jensen could tell him to go limp, and it’d take him whole seconds to fight past the alpha-ness. But Jensen didn’t seem to be making a move, just seemed to be breathing wide eyed and almost frightened looking.
“Stop looking at me like that,” Jensen said in a voice that Jared had never heard from him before, a voice strained tight and breaking as though it was taking some immense effort for Jensen to spit out his words. “I’m not going to fucking rape you.” Jared glanced away, he hadn’t known that it was that clear in his eyes what he’d thought was going to happen, that is was what he’d been steeling himself for, in the knowledge that if he cried out, if he shouted for help, it’d be his job on the line, his reputation, his everything. Who was going to believe that he wasn’t in heat, that whatever this was it wasn’t just fluctuations? Everyone knew about how kindly employers looked upon omegas who neglected to regulate themself in the workplace after all.
Jensen was staring at him still when he looked back. “What’s going on Jensen?” he asked, and again was amazed at how cool and calm his voice was, as though there was nothing unusual going on, just two co-workers shooting the breeze together.
“It’s you, you whore,” said Jensen, and that word in his mouth was poison. “You fucking omega coming into this building, irregular as shit, forcing this on me when I hate you, when the thought of sticking my dick in you makes me want to puke, except when it makes me want to come. This is your fault, you bastard, your fault.” His hands are shaking now, and Jared begins to feel a terrible thought blossoming in his mind.
“I don’t understand,” he says numbly, except he thinks that he’s beginning to, everything dropping into place, clicking together one by one, because life was unfair as anything, and he looks up at Jensen who is now leaning down so close he can see the brown and grey flecks in his green eyes, and who seems to have lost patience because he’s hauling Jared up against the desk turning him round, and running fingers that seemed more clinical than lustful down the back of his pants to press against the open swell of his wet hole.
“You’re not in heat are you,” said Jensen and it sounded like he was going to break, almost going to cry, and wouldn’t that be a shocker, alpha Jensen in tears over an omega, the sarcastic side of him that never stops thinks quietly. He shakes his head, shortly once, and Jensen continues. “I know you don’t like me, don’t want to fuck me, so it isn’t like this is voluntary. And I sure as hell don’t want to fuck you when I’m more than five feet away from you, so this is obvious.”
Jared stilled completely, still terribly aware of Jensen’s hand down his pants, the unconscious twitches against him that were driving him mad, but fighting it to think clearly, think rationally. “We’re bonded aren’t we,” he whispers, and the whole day makes sense. The sickness as his body recalibrated itself, the way Jensen smelt so good, why he felt like he was in heat just because this particular alpha was in the same room. The word reverberated in his head. Bonded. “Jesus,” he said, and just about restrained himself from throwing up. Months of trying with Gen, hoping each heat that this was the time, and now from one quick accidental throw away fuck he’s tied with this bastard, legally and physically. He starts to shake, slow terrible tremors that run through his body, that he recognises vaguely as fear.
Things are better now than they have ever been before, there are safeguards, protections, legal remedies for omegas bonded to alphas, but there is no undoing, there is no stopping, there is no release. And despite everything, despite all the progress, Jared had never wanted this, never wanted the sort of alpha so many omegas dreamed of. He’d wanted Gen when they’d been together, because she was Gen, not because she was an alpha. The idea of being with Jensen for life, not fucking anyone else, not having anyone else close to him ever for fear that their scent would trigger possessive behaviour, no lover who he wanted and cherished, not even someone he could tolerate was horrifying enough, the idea that when he was close enough he wouldn’t care about that, that when he was in heat he would beg for it, beg to be fucked because his body demanded that his alpha fulfil it, was even worse. That nothing else would satisfy him in that moment than Jensen’s cock.
He understands now why Jensen had sounded close to breaking point, understands clinically that this isn’t exactly Jensen’s idea of a match either, but can’t bring himself to care, not when his life flickers so horrifically before his eyes. All he can find to cling onto is that Jensen is a bastard, a jerk of the highest order, whose made it clear from day one that he didn’t think omegas should be working in the same building as him (didn’t even think they were for fucking either, not for him and his taste in steady competent betas,) but he isn’t a rapist. He isn’t a bad person. He clings onto those shreds of hope, that something can be salvaged from this, that while their bonding may never be sexless (can never be sexless,) that he’ll be allowed to retain at least some of his life, and realises dully that this is going to be his life from now on.
That he’ll constantly grasp at threads of hope, that he’ll take what scraps he can get of decency from a man he loathes. That he’ll have to second guess every single thing that ever happens to him, have to work doubly hard not only to make it at work, but actively against a partner he doesn’t want and who doesn’t want him, and who in some ways is justified in loathing him so much. It had been an accident, a confluence of events, but it had been his heat that had triggered the sex, his heat that had led to a bond neither of them wanted, and the futility of it all, struck him like a weight. Everything he’d worked for, for so many years, every heat he’d spent in his apartment alone fucking himself rather than looking for a bond, and all of it come to waste.
It runs through his mind in seconds, even as he’s dimly aware of Jensen breathing raggedly as he waits for him to come to the obvious conclusion, that there is nothing to do but accept this, to give in and let it happen. There was no choice, he could leave, he could run, and every heat he’d have in the rest of his shortened life would be agonising, every fibre would call out, and Jensen would be justified in preservation of his own life in seeking him, in bringing him back and forcing him to accede. He felt the truth of everything he was thinking, and slowly, letting Jensen see what he was doing, he pushes back, slides down his boxers and his pants and steps out of them, bends over until his arms rest on the desk and his face is inches away from the paperwork he’d been working on, and lets Jensen fuck him joylessly until they both come.
Sequel here
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