wooden spoons and oreos
i bought kat a box of oreos. well, her second box, that girl goes through oreos like theyre going out of fashion.
so last night, she opened the last tube in the box. she started eating, and kept eating, and when it got to four left, i stole the packet and hid them in my bag and told her that shed had enough and she could have the rest for breakfast.
to which she pouted, pretend cried, and then... attacked.
full body slam, she jumped on me, and reached behind me for my bag (which was on the floor beside the couch) and after a short scuffle, in which her longer arms won, she grabbed the oreos and danced away triumphant.
i wasnt going to let that stand.
no sirree bob.
so i got up after her, she grabbed her mug of milk, and ran towards the computer. i tried reaching for the oreos, but shes taller than me, so she looked down at me, with her arm held high, and laughingly said 'you wanna reach for them?' and then looked up at the oreos. no way in hell was i going to reach that high.
im not sure what happened next, but i ... oh ... no wait. she was threatening me with something. she had something in her hand. and i grabbed a pair of nail cutting scissors. and we had a mini battle. and i thought... im so losing. so i went and grabbed a whisk from the kitchen. kat laughed and said 'why didnt you get a knife' or something. no. thats serious. this is a fight over oreos. you use a whisk. so anyway, im fighting her with this whisk, and i cant remember what she had... oh my god no. i missed something out.
the REASON i got the whisk.
she pushed me backwards when i was reaching for the oreos. right backwards. back and over the couch. so im lying across the small couch, legs in the air, trying to laugh and be VERY angry at the same time. it wasnt working.
kat came over to upside down me and dunked an oreo in her milk and was saying 'mmmm oreos' and i reached out my toe and kicked the oreo out of her hand. it flew up, landed on the old tv beside me, bounced, and landed finally beside me on the couch. i almost split my sides laughing. oh my. it was so fucking funny. kat didnt think so. she kept asking where her oreo went. so anyway, she grabbed another oreo, i picked up the half soggy mushed one and gave it back to her. and then i unelegantly rolled off the couch onto the floor and thats when the nail scissors/forgotten kats weapon thing started. then i grabbed the whisk.
then kat went into the kitchen. and came back with a wooden spoon. she smacked me right on the arse with it. wooden spoons fucking hurt, okay?
so we're fighting. sword fighting. well, whisk and wooden spoon fighting. i put the whisk away, and instead try to grab the wooden spoon from her. fighting over a damn spoon. well, it was important. i got the spoon away from her. she nearly tripped me up by hooking her leg behind mine and pulling, and she said 'you cant win. i have a big brother' i got the wooden spoon though. and i stop and say, where are your oreos kat? hmm.. i wonder.
she had left them unprotected while getting the wooden spoon, and they were now cleverly hidden in my pocket. so i think ive won, i move over to the couch, kats sulking by the computer and keeps asking where her oreos are. i feel generous, and give them back to her. and what does she do? grabs the other wooden spoon out of the kitchen and we fight some more on the couch. she smacked my knees a lot. she ended up on the floor ... twice i think. i was fighting for both spoons, and she got knocked to the floor.
after a while, we just stopped. no cease fire was called, but we are both mature adults, and we both just stopped. except for when i slapped her in the face with a wooden spoon, and hid under the blanket, or when she played the drums on my knees and legs with both the wooden spoons. ... you know, we're mature adults.
i have to finalise my tickets. i know it would be inconveniencing a whole bunch of people back in australia if i didnt come back, but part of me hopes the tickets dont work out and i have to stay.
so last night, she opened the last tube in the box. she started eating, and kept eating, and when it got to four left, i stole the packet and hid them in my bag and told her that shed had enough and she could have the rest for breakfast.
to which she pouted, pretend cried, and then... attacked.
full body slam, she jumped on me, and reached behind me for my bag (which was on the floor beside the couch) and after a short scuffle, in which her longer arms won, she grabbed the oreos and danced away triumphant.
i wasnt going to let that stand.
no sirree bob.
so i got up after her, she grabbed her mug of milk, and ran towards the computer. i tried reaching for the oreos, but shes taller than me, so she looked down at me, with her arm held high, and laughingly said 'you wanna reach for them?' and then looked up at the oreos. no way in hell was i going to reach that high.
im not sure what happened next, but i ... oh ... no wait. she was threatening me with something. she had something in her hand. and i grabbed a pair of nail cutting scissors. and we had a mini battle. and i thought... im so losing. so i went and grabbed a whisk from the kitchen. kat laughed and said 'why didnt you get a knife' or something. no. thats serious. this is a fight over oreos. you use a whisk. so anyway, im fighting her with this whisk, and i cant remember what she had... oh my god no. i missed something out.
the REASON i got the whisk.
she pushed me backwards when i was reaching for the oreos. right backwards. back and over the couch. so im lying across the small couch, legs in the air, trying to laugh and be VERY angry at the same time. it wasnt working.
kat came over to upside down me and dunked an oreo in her milk and was saying 'mmmm oreos' and i reached out my toe and kicked the oreo out of her hand. it flew up, landed on the old tv beside me, bounced, and landed finally beside me on the couch. i almost split my sides laughing. oh my. it was so fucking funny. kat didnt think so. she kept asking where her oreo went. so anyway, she grabbed another oreo, i picked up the half soggy mushed one and gave it back to her. and then i unelegantly rolled off the couch onto the floor and thats when the nail scissors/forgotten kats weapon thing started. then i grabbed the whisk.
then kat went into the kitchen. and came back with a wooden spoon. she smacked me right on the arse with it. wooden spoons fucking hurt, okay?
so we're fighting. sword fighting. well, whisk and wooden spoon fighting. i put the whisk away, and instead try to grab the wooden spoon from her. fighting over a damn spoon. well, it was important. i got the spoon away from her. she nearly tripped me up by hooking her leg behind mine and pulling, and she said 'you cant win. i have a big brother' i got the wooden spoon though. and i stop and say, where are your oreos kat? hmm.. i wonder.
she had left them unprotected while getting the wooden spoon, and they were now cleverly hidden in my pocket. so i think ive won, i move over to the couch, kats sulking by the computer and keeps asking where her oreos are. i feel generous, and give them back to her. and what does she do? grabs the other wooden spoon out of the kitchen and we fight some more on the couch. she smacked my knees a lot. she ended up on the floor ... twice i think. i was fighting for both spoons, and she got knocked to the floor.
after a while, we just stopped. no cease fire was called, but we are both mature adults, and we both just stopped. except for when i slapped her in the face with a wooden spoon, and hid under the blanket, or when she played the drums on my knees and legs with both the wooden spoons. ... you know, we're mature adults.
i have to finalise my tickets. i know it would be inconveniencing a whole bunch of people back in australia if i didnt come back, but part of me hopes the tickets dont work out and i have to stay.