(no subject)
updating has been taking me a fucking long while, i know. but i just havent felt like telling everybody how much i felt like shit the past week.
i have been partying too much. last weekend i was so unhappy i went out and got way drunk. i felt sick and i had a fight with this guy named sascha who's like my personal bodyguard. he's a good friend of mine, well at least he was. he's like one of those good friends that overprotect you. that go crazy when you only talk to other boys, that then try and start a fight to 'protect' you. yeah whatever. he just meant to do good things but he just is too concentrated on getting my life straight that he misses out on the fun. so i was drunk and i danced with this HOTTTT boy and he came from behind trying to hit the other boy because apparently im 'his' gf or somewhat like that. but im not and he just says things too get me away from those bad boys that will of course give me drugs that i of course will take and then they of course will rip my clothes off and fuck me, right there. wtf?! yeah so i yelled and he tried to hug me, wouldnt work. i was so mad. he always fucks it up. god damn it. i was just having fun. he tried to calm me down, i started crying. it was so dramatic. he walked me home (takes like 3 hours). and it was like 38°F. and i had high heels on. it was so damn cold. i felt bad.
ive been meeting many new people that ive appreciated the company from. i just love them. they're fun and they live life. thats what should count right? i do that every day. ive been fighting a lot wit my parents, they are supposed to shut the fuck up and not care THAT much. god. ive not been coming home. its just sad. i cant take all these we're-a-happy-family-that-never-fights-talks.bullshit. we have more problems than ever before. but who cares, nobody does so all there is: we dont talk. i dont care, then i dont talk. im never home so w/e.
ive been spending my nights at tobi's-it's just been fun:)
no, its just that he makes me happy and thats all that counts. fuck the past, hes what i want. and i always get what i want!! hes so perfect and he loves me so much. its adorable.
oh god, i gtg and meet a friend cuz im giving him some good pair of jeans (replay) as a present. i found them so i dont need boys pants:) well i love you all. new updates will be coming, hopefully
ps: i love dana, adri, jenna, brownie, rick, nap and of course: my family. <3