[Failed lock to Birkin. Pictures may be NSFW on grounds of F/SN worms. Video.]

[stripping]

[Look, it's Issei standing outside his temple, he's holding a pretty big box of... What are those?

Please don't say those are your new pets, Issei...]Birkin, I found something for you. Well, more accurately I found something I don't want their current owner to have, I can't really destroy them without risking serious injury to myself, and I'm

Comments

[notahandbag]

...Worms. Issei, I'm not going to lie to you, they look like dicks. Dicks with teeth.

[stripping]

[Now that Birkin's seen them, Issei shuts the box and tapes it closed. Can't be too careful.] Since those don't have teeth, they must clearly be worms.

[notahandbag]

...Dickworms! Why are you giving me dickworms?! I already have one creepy looking penis to deal with!

Oh yeah, video forever.

[stripping]

I am giving you them because you are the best person that I know to deal with containing dangerous creatures, and because you might find them interesting scientifically. They don't even react that way to men from what I'm told, so try not to think of it in a sexual light. Please.

[notahandbag]

...Oh ew, you tried to use one on yourself didn't you? Issei, that's just not right.

[stripping]

Birkin. If I tried to 'use one on myself', it would eat my spine and part of my brain, crippling me for life. Did I mention I was giving them to you because you know how to deal with dangerous creatures?

[notahandbag]

Dicks that eat brains. Well, at least it's accurate, I guess. I don't know how I feel about letting these loose on Stein's world though. Maybe I'll just dump them on my world - err, you know. My old world, I mean - and never mention this again...

Or can they be kept in a terrarium for study or something?

[stripping]

Their old owner kept them in the basement. It should be fine in a terrarium - I thought you'd want to study them anyway given that they're used to enhance magical ability and you're all about unnatural things that increase ability - if they're fed. Same kinds of things Henry used to eat.

[notahandbag]

How do they enhance magical ability? Do you know? Could they even work on someone with no magical ability to begin with? It's not dangerous, is it?

[stripping]

From what Matou told me, if they're implanted in the body they force it to start producing much more mana to keep them satisfied? I don't know if it works on everyone, and I don't know if it's dangerous, but anything with 'implants' in the description I certainly wouldn't use on anyone without understanding it thoroughly, which I don't.

[Actuality: dangerous may or may not include torture-like levels of pain depending on your definition (Shinji didn't mention that to Issei anyway), and idek if they work on non-magical beings or whatever Soul Eater-verse has going for it. Have fun there.]

[notahandbag]

...When you say "implants"... You don't mean... Ugh, nevermind. That idea was terrible from the get go. I'll run some tests on these things though; see if you need to punch this Matou guy in the nose for me.

[stripping]

I always enjoy excuses to punch Matou in the face. Go right ahead.

[notahandbag]

Win-win situation then. I'll keep you updated.

[stripping]

Thank you very much. You are, as always, a dear friend.