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Feeling the feelings to be able to move on vakago March 8 2004, 21:19:21 UTC
I am not a trooper for reading the entire post. I am just a person who cares bout ya hun. I identified with alot of things you said so I am gonna take my time and tell ya how I feel about what you wrote. Basically I feel that everything you wrote is about acceptance. Can you accept Misha the way he is knowing that things are not typical and based on what society deems as normal? Can you accept his ups and downs, the fact that he won;t be able to party, the fact that he will have to live a clean and sober life in order to make his meds really work. Well no one can answer that for you. You sounds frustrated and at your wits end.
It is never easy to deal with people who are sick. Wether it be cancer or alcoholism illness is illness. Both are diseases like mental illness. One doesn;t wake up one morning and choose to suffer from bi-polar depression it just happends for what ever reason. How would you treat Misha if this was cancer? Have you asked yourself that? The answer should be the same as how you will treat him for his mental illness. If you can not handle that then I agree it is best to end the relationship and just be room mates until September. To Love some one in my eyes is to love them at their best and worst. When you met him he was bipolar and now it is just in its manic phase. If he gets on meds it will get better. The key is can you wait for that or will the meds change him so drastically that you might not want to. You need to think this through. What would you say to a wife of a man suffering from the same thing? Figure it out and then take your own advice. I wish I could tell you to LEAVE or to STAY but either way it has to be your decision and what is gonna make you happy. It is very rough but something inside me tells me you will rise to the challenge. Think of him being out as a vacation for you and do some nice things for yourself like bubble baths and maybe a go with the vibrator. Use the time to unwind and take care of you. I would not look at it any other way. I hope some of what I said is a help and or comfort. Please take care..............SUE

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Re: Feeling the feelings to be able to move on strippedscrew March 9 2004, 22:59:11 UTC
Thank you for the thoughtful reply--it is particularly meaningful knowing that it's come from someone so familiar with illness.

How would I treat him if this were cancer, not bipolar? That's a question that will be rolling around my mind for the forseeable future.

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