new otp 'verse: You Talk About Things That Nobody Cares [1/2]
Okay, so, apparently? Whenever I say I’m not gonna do something, it means I am. For future reference. But these boys won't shut UP. Maybe because they know what's in store? \0/ ANYWAY, new installment (not an interlude, yo) and this one's chopped up into two parts with an option for three. But probably two, for real. Also, I'm really behind on fic comments and emails, so I swear I'm not ignoring anyone! I'm gonna go work on that now, as a matter of fact. *g*
Title: You Talk About Things That Nobody Cares [1/2]
Characters: SV!Jensen/GG!Jared
Rating: NC-17.
Word Count: 4, 465
Disclaimer: I don’t own Jared or Jensen, I’m not affiliated with them, and none of the following ever happened. Of that, I can be certain.
Summary: Next installment in the new otp ‘verse.
Notes: I’d like to thank my beta of badassery, technosage, for being so enthusiastic about this ‘verse of mine and basically just letting me porn at her all hours of the night and day. And then fixing it. ♥
Chad’s in town, and Jared’s thankful. Not just because he likes Chad, but because he’s ready to lose his mind over everything. He hasn’t talked to Jensen since they’d gotten each other off over the phone, for God’s sake. Not that Jared is upset or anything. Hell, it’s only been a week or so, and they both deserve some time and space of their own. He’s not gonna be that guy who has to know every last thing Jen’s doing. It’s just. Well.
Work sucks as usual and he’s not sure what to do about it, or if there even is anything to do about it, because. Because. It’s not so much that he doesn’t like the people anymore, although he could cheerfully live without having to pretend to be head over heels for Alexis Bledel on a regular basis. It’s more that he’s just…he’s outgrown them all. There’s no challenge, and if being with Jensen has taught him anything other than the fact that a dick up his ass can feel damn good, it’s that Jared? Needs to be challenged.
He hasn’t looked at that horror/drama script since Vancouver. There’s still a part of him that recognizes the comfort and stability Gilmore Girls provides, and while he’s almost ready to branch out and try new things, he’s not entirely sure he’s making the right choice. Having someone else to talk about it with would help, and Chad’s here.
“I’m thinking about not renewing my contract,” he says abruptly while Chad stuffs his face with chili-cheese Fritos. Jared keeps his eyes trained on the poker tournament on TV, ignoring the loud crunch and gurgle as Chad swallows.
“Really,” Chad drawls, and his voice is devilishly pleased, if surprised. There’s a beat of silence, and then he leans over and punches Jared in the arm. “Dude, come to Wilmington. I’ll get you a spot as Lucas’ long-lost best friend who moved away when he was little and comes back as a girl.”
Jared manfully refrains from choking on his sip of Coke. “Sounds about right for a One Tree Hill plotline.” But he’s grinning, which is pretty much the effect Chad was going for, and suddenly everything feels a whole lot simpler. “I’m serious, man. I think I’m gonna go in and talk to Amy this week.”
Chad’s still smiling, but there’s a bit of hesitation coloring his gaze. “That’s great, Jared. But I mean, what’re you gonna do instead?” He crumples up the empty bag of chips, aiming for the trashcan and, surprisingly, making it. Apparently, all that basketball on the show’s paid off for someone. “I know you. You’re not gonna be happy sitting around on your ass while everyone else is off making a living.”
Jared smirks at the derogatory tone Chad gives the last few words, shaking his head. “You’re the laziest asshole I know.”
“That’s why you love me.”
Jared bites his lip, then just goes for it. “I have this script…they’re not really casting yet, but someone leaked it to the network early and…And I kind of took a copy.”
“Yeah?” Chad perks up, all supportive, interested expression. Although whether it’s because Jared’s quitting his job or that he stole to do it, is anyone’s guess. “What’s it about?”
Jared blows out a breath, turning to face Chad. “Okay, so. It’s about these two guys, right? They’re brothers, and there’s all this tension and issues and shit.”
“Oh, God. I’ve heard this one before.”
“No, these are real guys, not hormonal basketball players.” Jared ducks the fist Chad throws and laughs. “They’re on this road trip. And well, basically, they hunt evil shit and ride around in this sweet car and it’s like a different horror movie every week. That’s how the writer describes it, anyway. I don’t know, man, it’s genre. First script’s pretty cool though, it’s-”
“Wait, wait.” Chad holds up a hand. “Are you telling me you’re gonna do Buffy the Vampire Slayer for guys?”
“No way,” Jared huffs immediately. “And guys watch Buffy.”
“Yeah, they also watch One Tree Hill,” Chad counters. “But I dunno if I’d call them guys.”
“You’re an ass. Shut up and pay attention.”
“Okay, okay. So you wanna play a ghostbuster…whatever.” Chad gestures for him to keep going, and Jared rolls his eyes. “I’m listening!”
“I really wanna do this, Chad.” His voice is quiet now, and Chad’s smile fades, his expression turning serious.
“Then do it, man. And fuck anyone who tries to get in your way.”
Jared realizes that’s pretty much all he needed to hear.
They’re both quiet for several minutes, and then Chad stands up and stretches his arms over his head. “There’s nothin’ on TV. Hollywood Video, dude. Let’s give the local girls something to freak out about.” He wiggles his brows, voice sly and suggestive, and Jared can’t help but laugh.
“Yeah, I’m sure we’ll rock their world.” But he doesn’t protest when Chad starts out the door, Jared’s keys in one hand.
***
Jared finds himself wandering through the rows of videos, eyes passing over the colorful covers with idle interest. He can still hear the script’s dialogue in his head; still feel that little rush when he’d connected with Sam Winchester. He picks up a copy of Army of Darkness, staring distractedly at the image of Bruce Campbell holding a chainsaw.
“Sweet,” Chad says, coming up behind him and peering over Jared’s shoulder. “That’ll go great with what I picked out.”
Jared looks down, sees the latest John Cusack romantic comedy in Chad’s hand, and smirks. Chad’s always been a bit of a closet romantic, even though everything he outwardly portrays suggests otherwise. Jared thinks, maybe, Chad’s more comfortable watching other people be happy than actually making a go of it himself.
He opens his mouth to reply and is silenced when the front door jingles, opens, and a familiar voice drawls, “Whatever you want, babe, just make it quick.”
The grin on Jared’s face is frozen, clown-like and surreal, his fingers gripping the movie so hard he imagines he can feel Bruce’s chainsaw slicing through the tips. Chad’s staring at him, eyes darkening in confusion, but Jared can’t seem to find any words to explain the sinking feeling in his stomach.
He can feel Jensen. Can feel Jensen’s eyes on him, surprise and heat digging into Jared’s back, so he turns around. He forgets about Chad. About the movie in his hand. He forgets about everything but the sight of Jensen with a gorgeous blonde hanging on his arm, purring God only knows what into his ear.
Every minute they haven’t spoken suddenly flashes through Jared’s brain, the few days of comfortable silence transforming into uneasy distance as he swallows and stares over Jensen’s head at a poster of Finding Neverland.
Then the blonde’s disappearing further into the store and Jensen waits a moment before walking over, uncertainty in every step. Out of the corner of his eye, Jared can see the little shopgirl who’d tittered over him and Chad watching them, her excited, gossiping voice grating in his ears.
“I didn’t know you were in town,” he says, proud of the almost disinterested note in his voice. Of course, Jensen’s staring at his white-knuckled grip on the DVD case, so it’s all pretty pointless to pretend, anyway.
There’s an awkward beat of silence, compounded when Jensen finally raises his eyes to meet Jared’s, and Jared sees the inner wheels working behind that stoic stare. “Yeah, it was pretty last minute.”
Jared nods. Lies, all lies. His mouth tilts into a mockery of a smile that just. Hurts. “I guess…you left my number back in Vancouver?”
Jensen doesn’t flinch, but the corners of his mouth tighten just a bit. His voice is impatient when he says, “I know your number.”
Jared flinches, the words more than crystal clear. As well as the dismissal behind them. He’s opening his mouth to answer when Jensen suddenly goes rigid, eyes traveling over Jared’s shoulder and locking on something. Jared doesn’t have time to turn around before he realizes what’s going on.
“The fuck you doing here, Ackles?” Chad sneers, arm looping around Jared’s shoulders so that he’s propped against Jared in an inelegant sprawl, bristling like an attack dog. Jared appreciates the sentiment, if not the method, lips quirking just a bit as Jensen’s gaze flicks back and forth between them.
“Rest and relaxation?” Jared guesses before Jensen can speak, giving Jensen an out despite his own genuine curiosity. He doesn’t wanna see Chad grill Jensen, even if he’d personally like to strangle Jensen’s stubborn ass at the moment. Besides, there’s gotta be a good reason-
“I can’t find it,” the blonde woman interrupts, sidling up to Jensen and completely ignoring Jared’s - and Chad’s - existence. “Let’s go.”
Jared catches a whiff of some exotic, expensive perfume before he’s able to really get a good glimpse of her. Then gawks in recognition.
“Holy shit,” he hears Chad mutter beneath his breath, understanding the bitter appreciation coloring his friend’s words.
Jensen’s cool as ever when Jared stares at him. “Give me just a minute, Joanna,” he murmurs, expression not changing when she leans up and brushes a kiss across his cheek, smiling vaguely at Jared before turning and walking out of the video store.
“Nice,” Chad drawls, arm still wrapped around Jared’s neck. Jared feels like he’s suffocating. “So, what’s wrong with her?”
“Chad,” Jared murmurs, surprised he can even manage a civil tone when his throat is closed up so tight he can barely breathe without choking. “Cut it out, man.”
But Jensen just ignores Chad, watching Jared with the barest hint of a grimace coloring his features. He slides his hands into the pockets of his slacks - defense mechanism, Jared thinks, because he knows Jensen, even if Jensen’s trying his best to make it untrue.
“Jared,” he begins, quiet, and suddenly the last thing Jared wants right now is to hear whatever dumbass explanation Jensen’s planning to shove off on him. He might be slow on the uptake, but he’s quick enough at acceptance.
“You know, we’re gonna get stuck in traffic,” he says, too brightly, easing out of Chad’s grasp and waving the DVDs in his hand. “It was good to see you, Jen. I…” He swallows, turning up his smile another few notches. “Have fun while you’re here.”
Jensen’s expression goes carefully blank. “I will, Jay.”
Jared bites back a curse and does some goofy salute before turning on his heel and moving away, barely resisting the urge to stomp up to the counter. He can still feel Jensen watching him, but then the door jingles again and there’s nothing but cool air circulating. He meets the cashier’s curious gaze with a smile. “Hi, there. Can I get a bag for these?”
Chad’s abnormally quiet when they get back to Jared’s apartment. Not that Jared really notices much, wrapped up in ridiculous thoughts of Jensen and the blonde and Thanksgiving and just what the hell was even going on? He’d thought…well, he’d thought that he finally knew where they stood together. That maybe…
“Jay?”
His head snaps up at the familiar name on the wrong lips, sees Chad staring at him with burning eyes and a tight set to his mouth. “What?”
“Jay?” Chad repeats, snarling, and Jared’s jaw works when his friend adds, “Jen? What the fuck is going on, Jared? Since when do you know Jensen Ackles well enough to have pet names for the asshole?”
“He’s not an asshole,” Jared says immediately, although the truth is that Jensen is a major asshole. A son of a bitch, really, and Jared should just be fucking thankful for that weird scene at the video store, because now? Now he knows the real Jensen Ackles. Still, he doesn’t much like the idea of Chad talking shit about Jensen. Which just goes to prove how totally fucked the hell up Jared really is.
Chad’s still watching him, eyes narrowed into suspicious slits. When his voice comes, it’s grainy and rough. Worried, if Jared didn’t know Chad better. “Yeah, he is actually.”
“Whatever.” Jared doesn’t really want to talk about it right now. What he wants is to forget today ever happened, to bury himself in bed and wake up to find out it was all some stupid dream brought on by eating too much curry too late in the evening.
Surprisingly, Chad lets the subject drop, although Jared can tell this won’t be the end of it. “Hey, so, you wanna watch Ash kick some ass?”
Jared nods, grateful, ignoring the dull ache brewing behind his eyes.
***
He’s woken up hours later by warm breath and hands. He rolls over, sleep weighing his lashes as he makes out the blurry image hovering over him, apology and something else coloring those familiar features. Jared blinks, voice gruff and tired. “Jensen?”
“Hey,” Jensen says, and even though he whispers, it sounds much too loud.
Jared stares. “What’re you doin’ here?” he finally manages, wondering if he’s dreaming after all. Maybe that whole…thing had just been a figment of the overactive imagination he’s been accused of all his life.
Jensen holds something up, silver flashing in the moonlight. “I have a key,” he answers, although he knows that’s not what Jared means. “I just. I thought maybe we should talk.”
Jared can’t help but laugh at that. “You wanna talk? Um, you feelin’ okay, Jensen?”
His tone is teasing, but Jensen stiffens and looks away, voice shaky. “Damn it, Jared.” His teeth tug at his bottom lip, and he doesn’t quite meet Jared’s eyes when he murmurs, “You mad at me then?”
A few hours ago, the answer to that would’ve been an unequivocal, resounding yes. Now…
“I’m just, I’m confused, I guess.” Jared picks at a stray thread on his comforter, suddenly way too aware of his nakedness. Squirming a bit under Jensen’s steady gaze, he inwardly curses himself and then lifts his eyes. With a little more heat, he adds, “But then, you’ve made it pretty clear you’re not in LA to see me, so what the fuck does it matter?”
Jensen makes a face. “Jared.”
“Hey, you wanna mess around with sexy blonde supermodels, be my guest,” Jared drawls, nearly choking on the lie. “Not like I own you or anything.”
Jensen’s mouth quivers like he’s trying to suppress a laugh, although there’s nothing approaching amusement in his expression. “You don’t,” he agrees, low and hoarse.
“Yeah.” Jared’s fingers curl into fists, and he grins. “Same goes, you know.”
“You wanna hang out with sexy blondes?”
Jared keeps his voice steady when he says, “I’m kind of over blonds now. Brunets, too. Maybe I’ll give redheads a try.”
This time, Jensen seems to deflate before his eyes. “I’m sorry,” he says roughly, sounding anything but. His eyes are hostile and confrontational, glittering and wet. His fingers dig deep into Jared’s shoulders as he straddles his thighs and brings his face close. “I…don’t know.”
“Don’t know what?” Jared breathes, trying to ignore the rapid pulse of his heartbeat as Jensen grinds his hips down. He leans back on his elbows, throat working and lids falling. “Don’t know what?” he grits out, impatience creeping into his voice and making Jensen pause, surprise written across his features at Jared’s sudden show of force.
“Don’t know what the hell we’re doing,” Jensen finally growls, dragging his hips closer and mashing their lips together. Between wet licks at Jared’s mouth, he mutters, “Christ, I can’t breathe. Why aren’t you fucking mad, Jared?”
“You seem mad enough for both of us,” Jared gasps, tilting his head when Jensen’s lips work their way down his cheek, across the underside of his jaw. He arches his hips, feeling the press of Jensen’s dick against his own. “It’d be a bit much for me to be, too.”
Jensen pulls back and stares at him, conflicting emotions shadowing his features. Jared licks at his lips and pants heavily, too fucking tired to try and play like he doesn’t want this. Doesn’t want Jensen. Jensen makes a soft sound, not entirely pleasant, and then his teeth are pulling at Jared’s bottom lip and his fingers at the blankets.
“You’re always so fucking understanding,” he slurs, and again Jared takes note of the shine in Jensen’s eyes. The flush in his cheeks. There’s a faintly sour taste in Jensen’s mouth, and all at once everything makes sense.
“And you’re drunk,” Jared mutters, staring past him to the ceiling and trying not to make a complete fool out of himself by crying or some dumb shit. “You’re here because you’re fucking wasted and have nowhere else to go.”
Jensen lets out a manic laugh, fingers gripping Jared’s bare thighs. “You think so?” he says roughly, laying a slow lick up the side of Jared’s neck. “I got Joanna’s hotel room number. I doubt she’d mind if I-”
“You think you can pull this shit with me?” Jared’s shaking with anger now, hands shoving Jensen back so hard that Jensen stumbles to regain his balance on the bed. “The fuck do you think I am, Jen, some teenage groupie begging favors from the big, bad TV star?”
Jensen blinks long, stupid lashes. His mouth is shiny and wet, and in this light he looks almost vulnerable. But Jared’s not falling for this shit again. He’s about two seconds away from slamming a fist into Jensen’s too-pretty features or fucking him blind - he’s not sure which.
“Go ahead,” Jensen finally answers, licking his bottom lip like Jared had punched the tender flesh. It sends a jolt through him, along with hazy images of laving the nonexistent wound, and then Jensen adds, “Ask me about her.”
Jared flexes his fingers, but remains silent.
“I know you wanna know,” Jensen continues, voice dangerously provoking. “If I fucked her.”
Jared laughs, low and not amused. “Just leave, Jensen.”
“I didn’t.” It comes out on a frustrated breath, and when Jensen adds, “I wanted to. But I didn’t do anything, Jay,” Jared goes still.
“Well, don’t let me stop you,” he manages, wondering if this is what it feels like to have a heart attack. His chest burns and he can’t seem to get enough air in his lungs, and Jensen keeps staring at him like he’s fucking foaming at the mouth. “I understand,” he adds, even though it’s such a damn lie. Anything to just get Jensen to leave.
“You don’t understand anything!” Jensen shouts, practically shaking Jared. “You’re always…always fucking there and you…sometimes I can’t fucking breathe around you, Jared.”
“I heard you the first time,” Jared says tightly, reaching up to pry Jensen’s fingers away from his shoulders. “Fine. It’s over.” His breath hitches. “All you had to say…all you ever fucking had to say was that you wanted out.”
It’s like Jensen doesn’t even hear him. “I wanted to fuck Joanna, just to prove to myself that I could, y’know? That I wasn’t dick-whipped over some…some…” He trails off as Jared stares at him through blurry eyes. “I came for Steve’s concert. It’s…I can’t, it’s too quiet.”
Jared blinks, struggling to keep up with the conversation, heart still gagging his throat. “O-Okay.”
“Damn it, Jared.” Jensen growls low in his throat, presses the heel of his hand between his brows. “I want you to come with me,” he says, voice trembling. “I want you to be there.”
There’s a beat of silence, and then Jared slumps against the headboard. “I don’t fucking get you,” he murmurs, torn between relief and the lingering horror that this was it. That Jensen had finally realized that he was light years ahead of Jared in experience, intelligence, everything.
“I know, baby,” Jensen’s saying now - voice soft, nearly crooning as his hands find Jared’s dick and stroke. “Jus’…forget this happened, okay? I swear, I’ll…I’ll be better.” He’s babbling now, expression frantic and something else Jared can’t quite pin down before Jensen bends his head and drops a sloppy-wet kiss on the inside of Jared’s thigh. “I can make it good again.”
Jared is sufficiently weirded out. “Jen.” He tugs at Jensen’s head, fingers catching the short strands of hair. He sucks in sharply when Jensen opens his mouth over Jared’s cock, tongue curling. “Jen, wait.”
“Wanna taste you,” Jensen’s murmuring, voice dark and dirty, and Jared can’t help the burst of his hips or the soft whimper. Jensen grins sharply, and Jared just stares down at him, mind a dizzying whirlwind of what the fuck is going on?
“Please,” he chokes out, and he’s not sure if he means pleasestop or pleaseohgoddon’teverstop.
Jensen’s mouth is like a furnace, and so tight and wet that Jared’s quickly on the verge of forgetting every question he has. He just wants to thrust, to fuck up in between those lips until…until…
His fingers tighten, digging into Jensen’s scalp. “Oh. Oh, Jen…what’re you…”
Jensen looks up, eyes heavy lidded and challenging. “Just relax,” he whispers before his head disappears again. Jared feels hands pulling him open, feels that velvet-rough brush of tongue again, nearly choking on air as he gulps and bucks up.
“Jesus Christ.”
After months of fucking around with Jensen, he’s thought himself pretty versed in the art of, well, gay sex. But with Jensen’s tongue currently inside of him, Jared’s bluntly reminded of just how truly naïve he is. There’s a part of him that thinks he should be a little put off, grossed out, but the bigger part of himself can’t think beyond how fucking good it is.
Jensen’s hand is wrapped tightly around Jared’s cock, jerking him off in tandem with each tongue stroke. The other has Jared’s leg pulled high across Jensen’s shoulder, and Jared bites his lip and tries to keep still. He’s not at all certain about the etiquette of having your ass licked, and he doesn’t wanna do anything that might make it, well, stop.
But then Jensen’s mouth does something incredible that has Jared’s hips pumping against his will, and he hears Jensen growl low in his throat. Jensen pulls away with a gruff, “That’s it. Let me make you feel good, okay?” and Jared throws an arm over his eyes and cusses, low and filthy.
He hears the soft snick of a zipper being undone and the subsequent grunts and groans. Jensen’s touching himself, too. Jared’s teeth sink into his forearm and he thrusts up into Jensen’s fist, coming hard with the mental image of Jensen’s head between his thighs and callused fingers on his cock.
There’s an appreciative groan after that first white-hot burst, and then Jensen’s mouth is back on Jared’s dick, lapping and swallowing. Jared half-wonders why this feels more like an apology than any words Jensen could offer, but then Jensen’s teeth graze his dick and everything goes a bit gray. He opens his eyes, gaze riveted as Jensen humps into his own palm and shoots in a sticky-warm mess against the sheets.
Jared’s a bit shaky and disoriented when he lowers his leg and finally meets Jensen’s gaze. The hopeful question there burns away the rest of Jared’s anger, and he blows out a breath and mutters, “You stupid ass. C’mere.”
Both of them choose to ignore the thickness in his voice as Jensen presses up against him, lips finding Jared’s chin as he mumbles, “Good?”
“Real good, Jen,” he answers, again not entirely sure if they’re talking sex or not. He drags another pillow over, shoves it at Jensen. “Sleep, okay?”
He can feel Jensen staring at him, but all he says is, “Yeah.”
***
Jared makes sure he’s up before Jensen, dressed, cheerful smile in place when Jensen finally stumbles into the kitchen late morning. “Hey,” he says, pouring coffee and hoping to God his voice is as steady as his hand. “Black, right?”
If Jensen feels awkward over what happened the night before, it doesn’t show in his cool demeanor as he scratches his naked belly and drops into a chair. “Aspirin,” he chokes out, rubbing his face and grimacing. “God, my mouth tastes like ass.”
Jared nearly drops the mug, cheeks burning, and sends scalding coffee sloshing over the rim and onto the floor. “Uh, just a sec,” he manages, ignoring the weird look Jensen gives him and placing the coffee on the counter. “I’ve got Tylenol.”
“Wonderful,” Jensen sighs, head in his hand. He points to the coffee cup. “Just crumble up a few hundred in there, okay?”
Jared laughs a little too loudly, cringing at the sound. Back to Jensen, he closes his eyes and mutters a few choice phrases at himself before grabbing the coffee and bottle of pain reliever and handing both over to Jensen.
“You okay?” Jensen asks, eyeing Jared with some unreadable emotion. “You seem a little tense.”
Jared wants to laugh again, but he just shakes his head and croaks out, “M’fine. Just a bit of a headache.”
Jensen’s expression softens and he grunts. “I know the feeling.” He pops a few of the red and white capsules in his mouth before offering Jared the bottle.
Jared shakes his head. “Already took some.”
“Oh.” Jensen shrugs and takes a sip of the coffee, licking his lips. “Good.”
Good?
Real good, Jen.
Jared banishes the voices from his mind, smiling wider. He can do this. He can pretend everything’s okay, because it is. Jensen apologized, even though he didn’t…he hadn’t really done anything. They’re fine. Everything’s fine, and Jared’s not a chick. He’s not gonna worry about it.
Jensen’s here, after all.
“So, what time’s the concert?” he asks brightly, coming around the table to sit across from Jensen. He takes a sip from his own glass and does an admirable job of not choking on the bland taste when he realizes he forgot the sugar.
Jensen’s gaze dims only a little when he says, “Concert? Oh. Um, it’s not until later tonight.”
Jared refuses to be put off by the wary tone. “Sounds good,” he says, head and heart pounding. “I guess we can do whatever until then.” He waits a beat, then adds, “Or I can just…find you later.”
Jensen reaches out and grabs his arm. “We can do whatever,” he answers gruffly, and Jared relaxes a bit. “But what about Chad?” Jensen’s voice darkens a bit on the name. “Isn’t he visiting you?”
“He left for New York this morning.” Jared’s eyes narrow at the relief coloring Jensen’s gaze. “You two really don’t get along, do you?”
Jensen just tilts his cup back and drains the coffee in response, while Jared smiles and thinks maybe it’s time he found out the answer. And if Jensen won’t talk, well, he knows several ways to get Chad to.
[continue]
Title: You Talk About Things That Nobody Cares [1/2]
Characters: SV!Jensen/GG!Jared
Rating: NC-17.
Word Count: 4, 465
Disclaimer: I don’t own Jared or Jensen, I’m not affiliated with them, and none of the following ever happened. Of that, I can be certain.
Summary: Next installment in the new otp ‘verse.
Notes: I’d like to thank my beta of badassery, technosage, for being so enthusiastic about this ‘verse of mine and basically just letting me porn at her all hours of the night and day. And then fixing it. ♥
Chad’s in town, and Jared’s thankful. Not just because he likes Chad, but because he’s ready to lose his mind over everything. He hasn’t talked to Jensen since they’d gotten each other off over the phone, for God’s sake. Not that Jared is upset or anything. Hell, it’s only been a week or so, and they both deserve some time and space of their own. He’s not gonna be that guy who has to know every last thing Jen’s doing. It’s just. Well.
Work sucks as usual and he’s not sure what to do about it, or if there even is anything to do about it, because. Because. It’s not so much that he doesn’t like the people anymore, although he could cheerfully live without having to pretend to be head over heels for Alexis Bledel on a regular basis. It’s more that he’s just…he’s outgrown them all. There’s no challenge, and if being with Jensen has taught him anything other than the fact that a dick up his ass can feel damn good, it’s that Jared? Needs to be challenged.
He hasn’t looked at that horror/drama script since Vancouver. There’s still a part of him that recognizes the comfort and stability Gilmore Girls provides, and while he’s almost ready to branch out and try new things, he’s not entirely sure he’s making the right choice. Having someone else to talk about it with would help, and Chad’s here.
“I’m thinking about not renewing my contract,” he says abruptly while Chad stuffs his face with chili-cheese Fritos. Jared keeps his eyes trained on the poker tournament on TV, ignoring the loud crunch and gurgle as Chad swallows.
“Really,” Chad drawls, and his voice is devilishly pleased, if surprised. There’s a beat of silence, and then he leans over and punches Jared in the arm. “Dude, come to Wilmington. I’ll get you a spot as Lucas’ long-lost best friend who moved away when he was little and comes back as a girl.”
Jared manfully refrains from choking on his sip of Coke. “Sounds about right for a One Tree Hill plotline.” But he’s grinning, which is pretty much the effect Chad was going for, and suddenly everything feels a whole lot simpler. “I’m serious, man. I think I’m gonna go in and talk to Amy this week.”
Chad’s still smiling, but there’s a bit of hesitation coloring his gaze. “That’s great, Jared. But I mean, what’re you gonna do instead?” He crumples up the empty bag of chips, aiming for the trashcan and, surprisingly, making it. Apparently, all that basketball on the show’s paid off for someone. “I know you. You’re not gonna be happy sitting around on your ass while everyone else is off making a living.”
Jared smirks at the derogatory tone Chad gives the last few words, shaking his head. “You’re the laziest asshole I know.”
“That’s why you love me.”
Jared bites his lip, then just goes for it. “I have this script…they’re not really casting yet, but someone leaked it to the network early and…And I kind of took a copy.”
“Yeah?” Chad perks up, all supportive, interested expression. Although whether it’s because Jared’s quitting his job or that he stole to do it, is anyone’s guess. “What’s it about?”
Jared blows out a breath, turning to face Chad. “Okay, so. It’s about these two guys, right? They’re brothers, and there’s all this tension and issues and shit.”
“Oh, God. I’ve heard this one before.”
“No, these are real guys, not hormonal basketball players.” Jared ducks the fist Chad throws and laughs. “They’re on this road trip. And well, basically, they hunt evil shit and ride around in this sweet car and it’s like a different horror movie every week. That’s how the writer describes it, anyway. I don’t know, man, it’s genre. First script’s pretty cool though, it’s-”
“Wait, wait.” Chad holds up a hand. “Are you telling me you’re gonna do Buffy the Vampire Slayer for guys?”
“No way,” Jared huffs immediately. “And guys watch Buffy.”
“Yeah, they also watch One Tree Hill,” Chad counters. “But I dunno if I’d call them guys.”
“You’re an ass. Shut up and pay attention.”
“Okay, okay. So you wanna play a ghostbuster…whatever.” Chad gestures for him to keep going, and Jared rolls his eyes. “I’m listening!”
“I really wanna do this, Chad.” His voice is quiet now, and Chad’s smile fades, his expression turning serious.
“Then do it, man. And fuck anyone who tries to get in your way.”
Jared realizes that’s pretty much all he needed to hear.
They’re both quiet for several minutes, and then Chad stands up and stretches his arms over his head. “There’s nothin’ on TV. Hollywood Video, dude. Let’s give the local girls something to freak out about.” He wiggles his brows, voice sly and suggestive, and Jared can’t help but laugh.
“Yeah, I’m sure we’ll rock their world.” But he doesn’t protest when Chad starts out the door, Jared’s keys in one hand.
***
Jared finds himself wandering through the rows of videos, eyes passing over the colorful covers with idle interest. He can still hear the script’s dialogue in his head; still feel that little rush when he’d connected with Sam Winchester. He picks up a copy of Army of Darkness, staring distractedly at the image of Bruce Campbell holding a chainsaw.
“Sweet,” Chad says, coming up behind him and peering over Jared’s shoulder. “That’ll go great with what I picked out.”
Jared looks down, sees the latest John Cusack romantic comedy in Chad’s hand, and smirks. Chad’s always been a bit of a closet romantic, even though everything he outwardly portrays suggests otherwise. Jared thinks, maybe, Chad’s more comfortable watching other people be happy than actually making a go of it himself.
He opens his mouth to reply and is silenced when the front door jingles, opens, and a familiar voice drawls, “Whatever you want, babe, just make it quick.”
The grin on Jared’s face is frozen, clown-like and surreal, his fingers gripping the movie so hard he imagines he can feel Bruce’s chainsaw slicing through the tips. Chad’s staring at him, eyes darkening in confusion, but Jared can’t seem to find any words to explain the sinking feeling in his stomach.
He can feel Jensen. Can feel Jensen’s eyes on him, surprise and heat digging into Jared’s back, so he turns around. He forgets about Chad. About the movie in his hand. He forgets about everything but the sight of Jensen with a gorgeous blonde hanging on his arm, purring God only knows what into his ear.
Every minute they haven’t spoken suddenly flashes through Jared’s brain, the few days of comfortable silence transforming into uneasy distance as he swallows and stares over Jensen’s head at a poster of Finding Neverland.
Then the blonde’s disappearing further into the store and Jensen waits a moment before walking over, uncertainty in every step. Out of the corner of his eye, Jared can see the little shopgirl who’d tittered over him and Chad watching them, her excited, gossiping voice grating in his ears.
“I didn’t know you were in town,” he says, proud of the almost disinterested note in his voice. Of course, Jensen’s staring at his white-knuckled grip on the DVD case, so it’s all pretty pointless to pretend, anyway.
There’s an awkward beat of silence, compounded when Jensen finally raises his eyes to meet Jared’s, and Jared sees the inner wheels working behind that stoic stare. “Yeah, it was pretty last minute.”
Jared nods. Lies, all lies. His mouth tilts into a mockery of a smile that just. Hurts. “I guess…you left my number back in Vancouver?”
Jensen doesn’t flinch, but the corners of his mouth tighten just a bit. His voice is impatient when he says, “I know your number.”
Jared flinches, the words more than crystal clear. As well as the dismissal behind them. He’s opening his mouth to answer when Jensen suddenly goes rigid, eyes traveling over Jared’s shoulder and locking on something. Jared doesn’t have time to turn around before he realizes what’s going on.
“The fuck you doing here, Ackles?” Chad sneers, arm looping around Jared’s shoulders so that he’s propped against Jared in an inelegant sprawl, bristling like an attack dog. Jared appreciates the sentiment, if not the method, lips quirking just a bit as Jensen’s gaze flicks back and forth between them.
“Rest and relaxation?” Jared guesses before Jensen can speak, giving Jensen an out despite his own genuine curiosity. He doesn’t wanna see Chad grill Jensen, even if he’d personally like to strangle Jensen’s stubborn ass at the moment. Besides, there’s gotta be a good reason-
“I can’t find it,” the blonde woman interrupts, sidling up to Jensen and completely ignoring Jared’s - and Chad’s - existence. “Let’s go.”
Jared catches a whiff of some exotic, expensive perfume before he’s able to really get a good glimpse of her. Then gawks in recognition.
“Holy shit,” he hears Chad mutter beneath his breath, understanding the bitter appreciation coloring his friend’s words.
Jensen’s cool as ever when Jared stares at him. “Give me just a minute, Joanna,” he murmurs, expression not changing when she leans up and brushes a kiss across his cheek, smiling vaguely at Jared before turning and walking out of the video store.
“Nice,” Chad drawls, arm still wrapped around Jared’s neck. Jared feels like he’s suffocating. “So, what’s wrong with her?”
“Chad,” Jared murmurs, surprised he can even manage a civil tone when his throat is closed up so tight he can barely breathe without choking. “Cut it out, man.”
But Jensen just ignores Chad, watching Jared with the barest hint of a grimace coloring his features. He slides his hands into the pockets of his slacks - defense mechanism, Jared thinks, because he knows Jensen, even if Jensen’s trying his best to make it untrue.
“Jared,” he begins, quiet, and suddenly the last thing Jared wants right now is to hear whatever dumbass explanation Jensen’s planning to shove off on him. He might be slow on the uptake, but he’s quick enough at acceptance.
“You know, we’re gonna get stuck in traffic,” he says, too brightly, easing out of Chad’s grasp and waving the DVDs in his hand. “It was good to see you, Jen. I…” He swallows, turning up his smile another few notches. “Have fun while you’re here.”
Jensen’s expression goes carefully blank. “I will, Jay.”
Jared bites back a curse and does some goofy salute before turning on his heel and moving away, barely resisting the urge to stomp up to the counter. He can still feel Jensen watching him, but then the door jingles again and there’s nothing but cool air circulating. He meets the cashier’s curious gaze with a smile. “Hi, there. Can I get a bag for these?”
Chad’s abnormally quiet when they get back to Jared’s apartment. Not that Jared really notices much, wrapped up in ridiculous thoughts of Jensen and the blonde and Thanksgiving and just what the hell was even going on? He’d thought…well, he’d thought that he finally knew where they stood together. That maybe…
“Jay?”
His head snaps up at the familiar name on the wrong lips, sees Chad staring at him with burning eyes and a tight set to his mouth. “What?”
“Jay?” Chad repeats, snarling, and Jared’s jaw works when his friend adds, “Jen? What the fuck is going on, Jared? Since when do you know Jensen Ackles well enough to have pet names for the asshole?”
“He’s not an asshole,” Jared says immediately, although the truth is that Jensen is a major asshole. A son of a bitch, really, and Jared should just be fucking thankful for that weird scene at the video store, because now? Now he knows the real Jensen Ackles. Still, he doesn’t much like the idea of Chad talking shit about Jensen. Which just goes to prove how totally fucked the hell up Jared really is.
Chad’s still watching him, eyes narrowed into suspicious slits. When his voice comes, it’s grainy and rough. Worried, if Jared didn’t know Chad better. “Yeah, he is actually.”
“Whatever.” Jared doesn’t really want to talk about it right now. What he wants is to forget today ever happened, to bury himself in bed and wake up to find out it was all some stupid dream brought on by eating too much curry too late in the evening.
Surprisingly, Chad lets the subject drop, although Jared can tell this won’t be the end of it. “Hey, so, you wanna watch Ash kick some ass?”
Jared nods, grateful, ignoring the dull ache brewing behind his eyes.
***
He’s woken up hours later by warm breath and hands. He rolls over, sleep weighing his lashes as he makes out the blurry image hovering over him, apology and something else coloring those familiar features. Jared blinks, voice gruff and tired. “Jensen?”
“Hey,” Jensen says, and even though he whispers, it sounds much too loud.
Jared stares. “What’re you doin’ here?” he finally manages, wondering if he’s dreaming after all. Maybe that whole…thing had just been a figment of the overactive imagination he’s been accused of all his life.
Jensen holds something up, silver flashing in the moonlight. “I have a key,” he answers, although he knows that’s not what Jared means. “I just. I thought maybe we should talk.”
Jared can’t help but laugh at that. “You wanna talk? Um, you feelin’ okay, Jensen?”
His tone is teasing, but Jensen stiffens and looks away, voice shaky. “Damn it, Jared.” His teeth tug at his bottom lip, and he doesn’t quite meet Jared’s eyes when he murmurs, “You mad at me then?”
A few hours ago, the answer to that would’ve been an unequivocal, resounding yes. Now…
“I’m just, I’m confused, I guess.” Jared picks at a stray thread on his comforter, suddenly way too aware of his nakedness. Squirming a bit under Jensen’s steady gaze, he inwardly curses himself and then lifts his eyes. With a little more heat, he adds, “But then, you’ve made it pretty clear you’re not in LA to see me, so what the fuck does it matter?”
Jensen makes a face. “Jared.”
“Hey, you wanna mess around with sexy blonde supermodels, be my guest,” Jared drawls, nearly choking on the lie. “Not like I own you or anything.”
Jensen’s mouth quivers like he’s trying to suppress a laugh, although there’s nothing approaching amusement in his expression. “You don’t,” he agrees, low and hoarse.
“Yeah.” Jared’s fingers curl into fists, and he grins. “Same goes, you know.”
“You wanna hang out with sexy blondes?”
Jared keeps his voice steady when he says, “I’m kind of over blonds now. Brunets, too. Maybe I’ll give redheads a try.”
This time, Jensen seems to deflate before his eyes. “I’m sorry,” he says roughly, sounding anything but. His eyes are hostile and confrontational, glittering and wet. His fingers dig deep into Jared’s shoulders as he straddles his thighs and brings his face close. “I…don’t know.”
“Don’t know what?” Jared breathes, trying to ignore the rapid pulse of his heartbeat as Jensen grinds his hips down. He leans back on his elbows, throat working and lids falling. “Don’t know what?” he grits out, impatience creeping into his voice and making Jensen pause, surprise written across his features at Jared’s sudden show of force.
“Don’t know what the hell we’re doing,” Jensen finally growls, dragging his hips closer and mashing their lips together. Between wet licks at Jared’s mouth, he mutters, “Christ, I can’t breathe. Why aren’t you fucking mad, Jared?”
“You seem mad enough for both of us,” Jared gasps, tilting his head when Jensen’s lips work their way down his cheek, across the underside of his jaw. He arches his hips, feeling the press of Jensen’s dick against his own. “It’d be a bit much for me to be, too.”
Jensen pulls back and stares at him, conflicting emotions shadowing his features. Jared licks at his lips and pants heavily, too fucking tired to try and play like he doesn’t want this. Doesn’t want Jensen. Jensen makes a soft sound, not entirely pleasant, and then his teeth are pulling at Jared’s bottom lip and his fingers at the blankets.
“You’re always so fucking understanding,” he slurs, and again Jared takes note of the shine in Jensen’s eyes. The flush in his cheeks. There’s a faintly sour taste in Jensen’s mouth, and all at once everything makes sense.
“And you’re drunk,” Jared mutters, staring past him to the ceiling and trying not to make a complete fool out of himself by crying or some dumb shit. “You’re here because you’re fucking wasted and have nowhere else to go.”
Jensen lets out a manic laugh, fingers gripping Jared’s bare thighs. “You think so?” he says roughly, laying a slow lick up the side of Jared’s neck. “I got Joanna’s hotel room number. I doubt she’d mind if I-”
“You think you can pull this shit with me?” Jared’s shaking with anger now, hands shoving Jensen back so hard that Jensen stumbles to regain his balance on the bed. “The fuck do you think I am, Jen, some teenage groupie begging favors from the big, bad TV star?”
Jensen blinks long, stupid lashes. His mouth is shiny and wet, and in this light he looks almost vulnerable. But Jared’s not falling for this shit again. He’s about two seconds away from slamming a fist into Jensen’s too-pretty features or fucking him blind - he’s not sure which.
“Go ahead,” Jensen finally answers, licking his bottom lip like Jared had punched the tender flesh. It sends a jolt through him, along with hazy images of laving the nonexistent wound, and then Jensen adds, “Ask me about her.”
Jared flexes his fingers, but remains silent.
“I know you wanna know,” Jensen continues, voice dangerously provoking. “If I fucked her.”
Jared laughs, low and not amused. “Just leave, Jensen.”
“I didn’t.” It comes out on a frustrated breath, and when Jensen adds, “I wanted to. But I didn’t do anything, Jay,” Jared goes still.
“Well, don’t let me stop you,” he manages, wondering if this is what it feels like to have a heart attack. His chest burns and he can’t seem to get enough air in his lungs, and Jensen keeps staring at him like he’s fucking foaming at the mouth. “I understand,” he adds, even though it’s such a damn lie. Anything to just get Jensen to leave.
“You don’t understand anything!” Jensen shouts, practically shaking Jared. “You’re always…always fucking there and you…sometimes I can’t fucking breathe around you, Jared.”
“I heard you the first time,” Jared says tightly, reaching up to pry Jensen’s fingers away from his shoulders. “Fine. It’s over.” His breath hitches. “All you had to say…all you ever fucking had to say was that you wanted out.”
It’s like Jensen doesn’t even hear him. “I wanted to fuck Joanna, just to prove to myself that I could, y’know? That I wasn’t dick-whipped over some…some…” He trails off as Jared stares at him through blurry eyes. “I came for Steve’s concert. It’s…I can’t, it’s too quiet.”
Jared blinks, struggling to keep up with the conversation, heart still gagging his throat. “O-Okay.”
“Damn it, Jared.” Jensen growls low in his throat, presses the heel of his hand between his brows. “I want you to come with me,” he says, voice trembling. “I want you to be there.”
There’s a beat of silence, and then Jared slumps against the headboard. “I don’t fucking get you,” he murmurs, torn between relief and the lingering horror that this was it. That Jensen had finally realized that he was light years ahead of Jared in experience, intelligence, everything.
“I know, baby,” Jensen’s saying now - voice soft, nearly crooning as his hands find Jared’s dick and stroke. “Jus’…forget this happened, okay? I swear, I’ll…I’ll be better.” He’s babbling now, expression frantic and something else Jared can’t quite pin down before Jensen bends his head and drops a sloppy-wet kiss on the inside of Jared’s thigh. “I can make it good again.”
Jared is sufficiently weirded out. “Jen.” He tugs at Jensen’s head, fingers catching the short strands of hair. He sucks in sharply when Jensen opens his mouth over Jared’s cock, tongue curling. “Jen, wait.”
“Wanna taste you,” Jensen’s murmuring, voice dark and dirty, and Jared can’t help the burst of his hips or the soft whimper. Jensen grins sharply, and Jared just stares down at him, mind a dizzying whirlwind of what the fuck is going on?
“Please,” he chokes out, and he’s not sure if he means pleasestop or pleaseohgoddon’teverstop.
Jensen’s mouth is like a furnace, and so tight and wet that Jared’s quickly on the verge of forgetting every question he has. He just wants to thrust, to fuck up in between those lips until…until…
His fingers tighten, digging into Jensen’s scalp. “Oh. Oh, Jen…what’re you…”
Jensen looks up, eyes heavy lidded and challenging. “Just relax,” he whispers before his head disappears again. Jared feels hands pulling him open, feels that velvet-rough brush of tongue again, nearly choking on air as he gulps and bucks up.
“Jesus Christ.”
After months of fucking around with Jensen, he’s thought himself pretty versed in the art of, well, gay sex. But with Jensen’s tongue currently inside of him, Jared’s bluntly reminded of just how truly naïve he is. There’s a part of him that thinks he should be a little put off, grossed out, but the bigger part of himself can’t think beyond how fucking good it is.
Jensen’s hand is wrapped tightly around Jared’s cock, jerking him off in tandem with each tongue stroke. The other has Jared’s leg pulled high across Jensen’s shoulder, and Jared bites his lip and tries to keep still. He’s not at all certain about the etiquette of having your ass licked, and he doesn’t wanna do anything that might make it, well, stop.
But then Jensen’s mouth does something incredible that has Jared’s hips pumping against his will, and he hears Jensen growl low in his throat. Jensen pulls away with a gruff, “That’s it. Let me make you feel good, okay?” and Jared throws an arm over his eyes and cusses, low and filthy.
He hears the soft snick of a zipper being undone and the subsequent grunts and groans. Jensen’s touching himself, too. Jared’s teeth sink into his forearm and he thrusts up into Jensen’s fist, coming hard with the mental image of Jensen’s head between his thighs and callused fingers on his cock.
There’s an appreciative groan after that first white-hot burst, and then Jensen’s mouth is back on Jared’s dick, lapping and swallowing. Jared half-wonders why this feels more like an apology than any words Jensen could offer, but then Jensen’s teeth graze his dick and everything goes a bit gray. He opens his eyes, gaze riveted as Jensen humps into his own palm and shoots in a sticky-warm mess against the sheets.
Jared’s a bit shaky and disoriented when he lowers his leg and finally meets Jensen’s gaze. The hopeful question there burns away the rest of Jared’s anger, and he blows out a breath and mutters, “You stupid ass. C’mere.”
Both of them choose to ignore the thickness in his voice as Jensen presses up against him, lips finding Jared’s chin as he mumbles, “Good?”
“Real good, Jen,” he answers, again not entirely sure if they’re talking sex or not. He drags another pillow over, shoves it at Jensen. “Sleep, okay?”
He can feel Jensen staring at him, but all he says is, “Yeah.”
***
Jared makes sure he’s up before Jensen, dressed, cheerful smile in place when Jensen finally stumbles into the kitchen late morning. “Hey,” he says, pouring coffee and hoping to God his voice is as steady as his hand. “Black, right?”
If Jensen feels awkward over what happened the night before, it doesn’t show in his cool demeanor as he scratches his naked belly and drops into a chair. “Aspirin,” he chokes out, rubbing his face and grimacing. “God, my mouth tastes like ass.”
Jared nearly drops the mug, cheeks burning, and sends scalding coffee sloshing over the rim and onto the floor. “Uh, just a sec,” he manages, ignoring the weird look Jensen gives him and placing the coffee on the counter. “I’ve got Tylenol.”
“Wonderful,” Jensen sighs, head in his hand. He points to the coffee cup. “Just crumble up a few hundred in there, okay?”
Jared laughs a little too loudly, cringing at the sound. Back to Jensen, he closes his eyes and mutters a few choice phrases at himself before grabbing the coffee and bottle of pain reliever and handing both over to Jensen.
“You okay?” Jensen asks, eyeing Jared with some unreadable emotion. “You seem a little tense.”
Jared wants to laugh again, but he just shakes his head and croaks out, “M’fine. Just a bit of a headache.”
Jensen’s expression softens and he grunts. “I know the feeling.” He pops a few of the red and white capsules in his mouth before offering Jared the bottle.
Jared shakes his head. “Already took some.”
“Oh.” Jensen shrugs and takes a sip of the coffee, licking his lips. “Good.”
Good?
Real good, Jen.
Jared banishes the voices from his mind, smiling wider. He can do this. He can pretend everything’s okay, because it is. Jensen apologized, even though he didn’t…he hadn’t really done anything. They’re fine. Everything’s fine, and Jared’s not a chick. He’s not gonna worry about it.
Jensen’s here, after all.
“So, what time’s the concert?” he asks brightly, coming around the table to sit across from Jensen. He takes a sip from his own glass and does an admirable job of not choking on the bland taste when he realizes he forgot the sugar.
Jensen’s gaze dims only a little when he says, “Concert? Oh. Um, it’s not until later tonight.”
Jared refuses to be put off by the wary tone. “Sounds good,” he says, head and heart pounding. “I guess we can do whatever until then.” He waits a beat, then adds, “Or I can just…find you later.”
Jensen reaches out and grabs his arm. “We can do whatever,” he answers gruffly, and Jared relaxes a bit. “But what about Chad?” Jensen’s voice darkens a bit on the name. “Isn’t he visiting you?”
“He left for New York this morning.” Jared’s eyes narrow at the relief coloring Jensen’s gaze. “You two really don’t get along, do you?”
Jensen just tilts his cup back and drains the coffee in response, while Jared smiles and thinks maybe it’s time he found out the answer. And if Jensen won’t talk, well, he knows several ways to get Chad to.
[continue]