two gallants
still learning, still too self-aware and immature to reach the peak i'm climbing toward. i am very much in love with the world, but awfully stuck in this mud. I could write about my situation in metaphor and simile, symbolism and synonyms, but i'm stuck figuring out a bridge between the gaps in my heart, my mind.
this last girl was absolutely insane in the best way. i wish i could say i never raised an angry spirit or foul mood, but i wasn't ready. i am glad to learn now. I am at the point where i can end a relationship and feel so emotional and hurt but explain the situation as inexplicable and not take sides and bullshit the end of something so beautiful. i am happy with where i'm going, not where i am. pain in my heart; feelings of abandonment but still holding some sort of outside view.
it's been a very rough ride figuring our cognitive dissonance and the like. i can connect my personal and political lives and recognize them as very different beings. i can appreciate my willingness to reconcile my art and personal relationships, while not expecting or hurting them due to their difference.
blah blah blah.
i wish i was ready to love again, but this moment is beautiful.
this last girl was absolutely insane in the best way. i wish i could say i never raised an angry spirit or foul mood, but i wasn't ready. i am glad to learn now. I am at the point where i can end a relationship and feel so emotional and hurt but explain the situation as inexplicable and not take sides and bullshit the end of something so beautiful. i am happy with where i'm going, not where i am. pain in my heart; feelings of abandonment but still holding some sort of outside view.
it's been a very rough ride figuring our cognitive dissonance and the like. i can connect my personal and political lives and recognize them as very different beings. i can appreciate my willingness to reconcile my art and personal relationships, while not expecting or hurting them due to their difference.
blah blah blah.
i wish i was ready to love again, but this moment is beautiful.