(no subject)
Make a list of all the characters in your icons. (Although you may have more than one icon of a single character, they only go on the list once.) Alphabetize it. Take the first two people on the list; that's your first pairing. Second two people; second pairing. Etc. Then write your reaction to each pairing (or a snippet of a hypothetical fic featuring each pairing).
I took out some characters that I couldn't remember anything about. (Corporate Kira from Death Note, the guys from this weird film called Nothing, Zack of Heroes.) And I included the people from quote icons, when I could remember who said it.
Anne Shirley/Angel - Angel would probably feel pretty protective of Anne and she'd think he was dark and mysterious and romantic~ But they wouldn't get together. While Anne definitely can have a sharp tongue, she isn't tough enough for him. And Angel doesn't talk enough - she likes bouncing ideas of people.
Angelus (Angel)/Apu (The Simpsons) - HAHAHAHAHA.... Ahem. Angelus might eat him. I can't imagine much beyond that. Maybe he'd torture him first? But Apu isn't the type that he'd go destroy the entire family just to watch him break. He might kill Apu to mindfuck Apu's wife though.
Atia (Rome)/Ax (Animorphs) - Apparently Ax's human form is much prettier than the average male. Maybe Atia would make him her boy toy. ("Pussy. Pu-see. Pussssseeeeee-" "Just put it in!")
Bootsie (Friendly Hostility)/Brain (Pinky and the Brain) - ...oh god, Bootsie and Collin seem like AU versions of Pinky and the Brain sometimes when Collin plans to take over a mid-sized South American country. So, nothing sexual here ow, but maybe she could help him TRY TO TAKE OVER THE WORLD and he could agree to give her a country in exchange.
Buffy Summers/Carrie Dollanganger (Flowers in the Attic) - Carrie would be a way better little sister than Dawn. Pairing wise, her self esteem is too low for Buffy to be interested.
Catherine Dollanganger (Flowers in the Attic)/Captain Jack Sparrow (PotC) - Manipulative bitch with a thing for dastardly dark-haired men plus pirate of questionable competence with a thing for... women and maybe goats.
Catwoman (Michelle Pfeiffer in "Batman Returns")/Chase Stein (Runaways) - "I'm not into crazy cat ladies, but now I'm sort of into crazy cat ladies." Chase would think she was hot even if he was dating Gert because Catwoman is hot. She'd think he was an idiot.
Christopher Dollanganger (Flowers in the Attic)/Claire Bennet (Heroes) - Christopher said that he could never love another woman like how he loves his sister Cathy. But another seemingly sweet blonde girl with hidden ...wrongness? might ping him.
Claire Fischer (Six Feet Under)/Collin (Friendly Hostility) - Collin is gay and already has a redheaded female bff. Maybe they could be cynical together?
Connor (Angel)/Creed (The Office US) - OW. Creed never goes there. Even if some boys might have slipped in with all those ladies he banged in the 1970s.
Delirium (Sandman)/Derringer (Friendly Hostility) - Delirium does not get shipped, but Derringer seems a little delusional sometimes. He isn't really crazy though.
Desire (Sandman)/Despair (Sandman) - I divided Angel and Angelus up to avoid pairing Carrie and Cathy because it's not a good incest. This is weird too. Um. They're twins, and Despair is the only being that he really cares about. And Desire is the only one besides Destruction who seems to really enjoy her company. I would say that they're each other's most important person.
Destiny (Sandman)/Dexter Morgan (Dexter) - Aaargh, Endless. I think that Destiny would scare Dexter actually, or at least as much as Dexter can be really frightened. He would lay Dexter's truth bare.
Dick Casablancas (Veronica Mars)/Doakes (Dexter) - Doakes would think that Dick was a motherfucking punkass rich kid. They could snark. Hatesex? Doakes shows up to question him about Lilly and/or other murder cases in Neptune and THINGS HAPPEN? (...Oh god, Doakes is not secretly Sheriff Lamb.)
Draco Malfoy(Harry Potter)/Dream(Sandman) - Dream is apparently straight, which is quite funny for an anthropomorphic personification of a concept as fluid as a dream is. Aside from sexuality, Draco doesn't seem strong enough for Dream to be interested in that way - Nada, Thessaly, and even Calliope are all very capable of standing up to Dream and pointing out his bullshit.
Dumbledore (Harry Potter)/Dwayne (Little Miss Sunshine) - Just because Dumbledore is gay does not mean he's into teenagers. Maybe when he was a teenager? I think that Dwight is a little too obviously cynical for young!Dumbles though.
Dwight Schrute (The Office US)/Enid (Ghost World movie) - Dwight is a misfit, and Enid enjoys mocking misfits - and yes, she's one too. She might find him interesting if they somehow got to know each other, but Dwight wouldn't be attracted.
Ferris Bueller (Ferris Bueller's Day Off)/Fox Maharassa (Friendly Hostility) - They both like hot chicks and have best friends they've known since they were little! Of course, while Ferris and his bffl are totally married it's not in a "I'd actually marry you if it were legal" sort of way. Wow this is off topic. Okay, so if this is set sometime before Fox and Collin got together and Fox and Ferris are somehow in college at the same time, then Fox would be a good guy for Ferris to experiment with! They both like shenanigans and hot chicks and have somewhat evil older sisters. They could bond.
Geoffrey Tennant (Slings and Arrows)/Giles (Buffyverse) - Paul Gross/Anthony Stewart Head... Mmmmm. I think they could get together under very specific circumstances.
Gogo Yubari (Kill Bill)/Gojyo (Saiyuki) - See this scene. ...fine, maybe Gojyo would go all hero complex and try to save her from her own craziness. But it would end VERY BADLY.
Hayley Stark (Hard Candy)/Hermione Granger (Harry Potter) - They're both highly intelligent teenage girls who should not be underestimated. Of course, Hayley is also sadistic and possibly a psychopath. They'd have interesting debates over the morality of the death penalty at least.
House/Jayne Cobb (Firefly) - This is like Jayne/Simon which I hate except House is older and even more sarcastic. I can't even imagine there being hatesex - House hatesexes with people near his intellectual level.
Kaylee (Firefly)/Keladry of Mindelan (Tortall) - Well, Kel does like her men playful so if she was into women she'd probably like them that way too. And Kaylee likes quiet smart types with nice muscles. Why not?
Keith Mars (Veronica Mars)/Kouya (Loveless) - KEITH DOES NOT DATE PEOPLE YOUNGER THAN HIS DAUGHTER. OR IN AN AGE RANGE TO BE HIS DAUGHTER. He could be a father figure maybe.
L (Death Note)/Lilah Morgan (Angel) - So Wolfram & Hart, evil law firm that they are, tried to recruit a teenaged L to work with them. They sent one of their young bright stars to recruit. Discussions on moral grey areas leads to a Mrs. Robinson hot sexing, where Lilah takes charge because L-types obviously have no idea what to do. (Or they do, but not yet.)
Logan Echolls (Veronica Mars)/Masuka (Dexter) - Masuka may want a hot blonde, but not a hot blonde dude! What! It's a threat to his overwhelming masculinity! Logan likes sarcastic types, not pervy bald ones. No go!
Malcolm Reynolds (Firefly)/Marc Antony (Rome) - In some crazy AU-verse, Mal is one of Marc Antony's young soldiers. Young!Mal is more idealistic and looks up to Marc Antony, who sometimes likes nice-looking young men when women aren't around. Hot sex!
Marco (Animorphs)/Mello (Death Note) - Despite his funny-man exterior, Marco is a good strategist and often quite ruthless. Mello swings between planning obsessively and doing crazy unpredictable things. I think they could see through each other, even if they didn't know the full extent of what the other one does. Like Marco/Rachel with more leather, or Mello/Near with more snark. (...I want someone to write this crossover now.)
Michael (The Office US)/Misa (Death Note) - Young!Michael would have thought she was hot and awesome but never have stood a chance. And current Michael isn't crazy enough for her.
Miss Piggy/Nefertari (Friendly Hostility) - Hot women who top! They could be friends. Or if Miss Piggy wasn't a muppet and Nefertari didn't have a husband that I adore, they could hook up. It would be hot.
Nico Minoru (Runaways)/Olive (Little Miss Sunshine) - Olive is about seven. Older!Olive deserves someone who doesn't freak out and make out with random people. I like Nico, but Olive should get someone who will be more committed.
O-Ren Ishii (Kill Bill)/Pietro aka "Quicksilver" (X-Men: Evolution) - Pietro becomes one of O-Ren's head thugs and she's amused enough to train him in more than one kind of swordsmanship~
Pinky (Pinky and the Brain)/Raito aka Light aka KIRA (Death Note) - "What are we doing tonight Raito?" "The same thing we do every night Pinky - try to take over the world convince the world to make me GOD!"
Richard Hoover (Little Miss Sunshine)/Rizzo (Grease) - ...she would hate him. He would think she was a self-defeating individual.
Rogue (Comics)/Sandy (Grease) - Rogue can't touch people. And I don't think hooking up with a girl would occur to even end-of-the-movie Sandy. If they did get together, there would angsty musical numbers. With a southern accent. It would be awesome.
Scar (Lion King)/Sophie Fatale (Kill Bill) - IF THEY WERE THE SAME SPECIES then sure. They're both manipulative. Scar aims for leadership whereas Sophie goes for a behind-the-scenes postition, so there shouldn't be conflict. (Not quite as hot as O-ren/Sophie, but still interesting.)
Snape (Harry Potter)/Spike (Buffyverse) - Snape would be so irritated and go all Defence Against the Dark Arts on Spike's ass. And not in a good way. Plus Spike (or at least the Spike I acknowledge) is evil so Snape wouldn't even have to feel bad. (Young-Death-Eater!Snape might be okay with something happening if Spike was working with them. Which he wouldn't so it's irrelevant, that episode during Angel's fifth season never happened.)
The Phoenix (X-Men movies)/Veronica Mars - The Phoenix might like Veronica's snark. Or she might be irritated and kill her. It's hard to tell.
Victor Mancha (Runaways)/Wallace Fennel (Veronica Mars) - Wallace apparently wants to be some sort of engineer, and Victor is a cyborg. The fic: "Victor and Nico break up, leaving Victor brokenhearted. He runs into Wallace, the best friend a person could have. Can Wallace's goodness mend Victor's heart?"
Wanda (X-Men: Evolution)/Wash (Firefly) - WANDA WHY ARE YOU NOT ZOE AND UNDERAGED AND ALSO WHY AREN'T YOU ZOE? Young!Wash was probably adorable and liked women who could break him into a tiny little pieces. Wanda would like being treated like a queen. It could be cute.
Wednesday Addams (The Addams Family)/Wesley (Dorky and Bitter)(Angel) - Ow, 12 year old does not go there. And kid!Wesley was so straitlaced and emotionally abused. Adult!Wednesday and Wesley might get up to some interesting things that I really don't need to know the details of. They meet because Wesley needs an expert in dark magic.
Will Turner (PotC)/Zoe (Firefly) - WHY AREN'T YOU WASH? Pre-Wash, Zoe probably had bitches like Will. "Young soldier/badass/pirate-type, come here so I can top you!" Yes.
I was actually working on this on and off for more than a week. God I'm unproductive.
I took out some characters that I couldn't remember anything about. (Corporate Kira from Death Note, the guys from this weird film called Nothing, Zack of Heroes.) And I included the people from quote icons, when I could remember who said it.
Anne Shirley/Angel - Angel would probably feel pretty protective of Anne and she'd think he was dark and mysterious and romantic~ But they wouldn't get together. While Anne definitely can have a sharp tongue, she isn't tough enough for him. And Angel doesn't talk enough - she likes bouncing ideas of people.
Angelus (Angel)/Apu (The Simpsons) - HAHAHAHAHA.... Ahem. Angelus might eat him. I can't imagine much beyond that. Maybe he'd torture him first? But Apu isn't the type that he'd go destroy the entire family just to watch him break. He might kill Apu to mindfuck Apu's wife though.
Atia (Rome)/Ax (Animorphs) - Apparently Ax's human form is much prettier than the average male. Maybe Atia would make him her boy toy. ("Pussy. Pu-see. Pussssseeeeee-" "Just put it in!")
Bootsie (Friendly Hostility)/Brain (Pinky and the Brain) - ...oh god, Bootsie and Collin seem like AU versions of Pinky and the Brain sometimes when Collin plans to take over a mid-sized South American country. So, nothing sexual here ow, but maybe she could help him TRY TO TAKE OVER THE WORLD and he could agree to give her a country in exchange.
Buffy Summers/Carrie Dollanganger (Flowers in the Attic) - Carrie would be a way better little sister than Dawn. Pairing wise, her self esteem is too low for Buffy to be interested.
Catherine Dollanganger (Flowers in the Attic)/Captain Jack Sparrow (PotC) - Manipulative bitch with a thing for dastardly dark-haired men plus pirate of questionable competence with a thing for... women and maybe goats.
Catwoman (Michelle Pfeiffer in "Batman Returns")/Chase Stein (Runaways) - "I'm not into crazy cat ladies, but now I'm sort of into crazy cat ladies." Chase would think she was hot even if he was dating Gert because Catwoman is hot. She'd think he was an idiot.
Christopher Dollanganger (Flowers in the Attic)/Claire Bennet (Heroes) - Christopher said that he could never love another woman like how he loves his sister Cathy. But another seemingly sweet blonde girl with hidden ...wrongness? might ping him.
Claire Fischer (Six Feet Under)/Collin (Friendly Hostility) - Collin is gay and already has a redheaded female bff. Maybe they could be cynical together?
Connor (Angel)/Creed (The Office US) - OW. Creed never goes there. Even if some boys might have slipped in with all those ladies he banged in the 1970s.
Delirium (Sandman)/Derringer (Friendly Hostility) - Delirium does not get shipped, but Derringer seems a little delusional sometimes. He isn't really crazy though.
Desire (Sandman)/Despair (Sandman) - I divided Angel and Angelus up to avoid pairing Carrie and Cathy because it's not a good incest. This is weird too. Um. They're twins, and Despair is the only being that he really cares about. And Desire is the only one besides Destruction who seems to really enjoy her company. I would say that they're each other's most important person.
Destiny (Sandman)/Dexter Morgan (Dexter) - Aaargh, Endless. I think that Destiny would scare Dexter actually, or at least as much as Dexter can be really frightened. He would lay Dexter's truth bare.
Dick Casablancas (Veronica Mars)/Doakes (Dexter) - Doakes would think that Dick was a motherfucking punkass rich kid. They could snark. Hatesex? Doakes shows up to question him about Lilly and/or other murder cases in Neptune and THINGS HAPPEN? (...Oh god, Doakes is not secretly Sheriff Lamb.)
Draco Malfoy(Harry Potter)/Dream(Sandman) - Dream is apparently straight, which is quite funny for an anthropomorphic personification of a concept as fluid as a dream is. Aside from sexuality, Draco doesn't seem strong enough for Dream to be interested in that way - Nada, Thessaly, and even Calliope are all very capable of standing up to Dream and pointing out his bullshit.
Dumbledore (Harry Potter)/Dwayne (Little Miss Sunshine) - Just because Dumbledore is gay does not mean he's into teenagers. Maybe when he was a teenager? I think that Dwight is a little too obviously cynical for young!Dumbles though.
Dwight Schrute (The Office US)/Enid (Ghost World movie) - Dwight is a misfit, and Enid enjoys mocking misfits - and yes, she's one too. She might find him interesting if they somehow got to know each other, but Dwight wouldn't be attracted.
Ferris Bueller (Ferris Bueller's Day Off)/Fox Maharassa (Friendly Hostility) - They both like hot chicks and have best friends they've known since they were little! Of course, while Ferris and his bffl are totally married it's not in a "I'd actually marry you if it were legal" sort of way. Wow this is off topic. Okay, so if this is set sometime before Fox and Collin got together and Fox and Ferris are somehow in college at the same time, then Fox would be a good guy for Ferris to experiment with! They both like shenanigans and hot chicks and have somewhat evil older sisters. They could bond.
Geoffrey Tennant (Slings and Arrows)/Giles (Buffyverse) - Paul Gross/Anthony Stewart Head... Mmmmm. I think they could get together under very specific circumstances.
Gogo Yubari (Kill Bill)/Gojyo (Saiyuki) - See this scene. ...fine, maybe Gojyo would go all hero complex and try to save her from her own craziness. But it would end VERY BADLY.
Hayley Stark (Hard Candy)/Hermione Granger (Harry Potter) - They're both highly intelligent teenage girls who should not be underestimated. Of course, Hayley is also sadistic and possibly a psychopath. They'd have interesting debates over the morality of the death penalty at least.
House/Jayne Cobb (Firefly) - This is like Jayne/Simon which I hate except House is older and even more sarcastic. I can't even imagine there being hatesex - House hatesexes with people near his intellectual level.
Kaylee (Firefly)/Keladry of Mindelan (Tortall) - Well, Kel does like her men playful so if she was into women she'd probably like them that way too. And Kaylee likes quiet smart types with nice muscles. Why not?
Keith Mars (Veronica Mars)/Kouya (Loveless) - KEITH DOES NOT DATE PEOPLE YOUNGER THAN HIS DAUGHTER. OR IN AN AGE RANGE TO BE HIS DAUGHTER. He could be a father figure maybe.
L (Death Note)/Lilah Morgan (Angel) - So Wolfram & Hart, evil law firm that they are, tried to recruit a teenaged L to work with them. They sent one of their young bright stars to recruit. Discussions on moral grey areas leads to a Mrs. Robinson hot sexing, where Lilah takes charge because L-types obviously have no idea what to do. (Or they do, but not yet.)
Logan Echolls (Veronica Mars)/Masuka (Dexter) - Masuka may want a hot blonde, but not a hot blonde dude! What! It's a threat to his overwhelming masculinity! Logan likes sarcastic types, not pervy bald ones. No go!
Malcolm Reynolds (Firefly)/Marc Antony (Rome) - In some crazy AU-verse, Mal is one of Marc Antony's young soldiers. Young!Mal is more idealistic and looks up to Marc Antony, who sometimes likes nice-looking young men when women aren't around. Hot sex!
Marco (Animorphs)/Mello (Death Note) - Despite his funny-man exterior, Marco is a good strategist and often quite ruthless. Mello swings between planning obsessively and doing crazy unpredictable things. I think they could see through each other, even if they didn't know the full extent of what the other one does. Like Marco/Rachel with more leather, or Mello/Near with more snark. (...I want someone to write this crossover now.)
Michael (The Office US)/Misa (Death Note) - Young!Michael would have thought she was hot and awesome but never have stood a chance. And current Michael isn't crazy enough for her.
Miss Piggy/Nefertari (Friendly Hostility) - Hot women who top! They could be friends. Or if Miss Piggy wasn't a muppet and Nefertari didn't have a husband that I adore, they could hook up. It would be hot.
Nico Minoru (Runaways)/Olive (Little Miss Sunshine) - Olive is about seven. Older!Olive deserves someone who doesn't freak out and make out with random people. I like Nico, but Olive should get someone who will be more committed.
O-Ren Ishii (Kill Bill)/Pietro aka "Quicksilver" (X-Men: Evolution) - Pietro becomes one of O-Ren's head thugs and she's amused enough to train him in more than one kind of swordsmanship~
Pinky (Pinky and the Brain)/Raito aka Light aka KIRA (Death Note) - "What are we doing tonight Raito?" "The same thing we do every night Pinky - try to take over the world convince the world to make me GOD!"
Richard Hoover (Little Miss Sunshine)/Rizzo (Grease) - ...she would hate him. He would think she was a self-defeating individual.
Rogue (Comics)/Sandy (Grease) - Rogue can't touch people. And I don't think hooking up with a girl would occur to even end-of-the-movie Sandy. If they did get together, there would angsty musical numbers. With a southern accent. It would be awesome.
Scar (Lion King)/Sophie Fatale (Kill Bill) - IF THEY WERE THE SAME SPECIES then sure. They're both manipulative. Scar aims for leadership whereas Sophie goes for a behind-the-scenes postition, so there shouldn't be conflict. (Not quite as hot as O-ren/Sophie, but still interesting.)
Snape (Harry Potter)/Spike (Buffyverse) - Snape would be so irritated and go all Defence Against the Dark Arts on Spike's ass. And not in a good way. Plus Spike (or at least the Spike I acknowledge) is evil so Snape wouldn't even have to feel bad. (Young-Death-Eater!Snape might be okay with something happening if Spike was working with them. Which he wouldn't so it's irrelevant, that episode during Angel's fifth season never happened.)
The Phoenix (X-Men movies)/Veronica Mars - The Phoenix might like Veronica's snark. Or she might be irritated and kill her. It's hard to tell.
Victor Mancha (Runaways)/Wallace Fennel (Veronica Mars) - Wallace apparently wants to be some sort of engineer, and Victor is a cyborg. The fic: "Victor and Nico break up, leaving Victor brokenhearted. He runs into Wallace, the best friend a person could have. Can Wallace's goodness mend Victor's heart?"
Wanda (X-Men: Evolution)/Wash (Firefly) - WANDA WHY ARE YOU NOT ZOE AND UNDERAGED AND ALSO WHY AREN'T YOU ZOE? Young!Wash was probably adorable and liked women who could break him into a tiny little pieces. Wanda would like being treated like a queen. It could be cute.
Wednesday Addams (The Addams Family)/Wesley (Dorky and Bitter)(Angel) - Ow, 12 year old does not go there. And kid!Wesley was so straitlaced and emotionally abused. Adult!Wednesday and Wesley might get up to some interesting things that I really don't need to know the details of. They meet because Wesley needs an expert in dark magic.
Will Turner (PotC)/Zoe (Firefly) - WHY AREN'T YOU WASH? Pre-Wash, Zoe probably had bitches like Will. "Young soldier/badass/pirate-type, come here so I can top you!" Yes.
I was actually working on this on and off for more than a week. God I'm unproductive.