armageddon
A lot of things have changed, a lot of things have stayed the same.Thankfully, my luck in getting a good roommate has yet to run out, living with Mandee has been pretty much of a breeze since we both are exactly alike in living situations and having considerate tendencies. She has been an emo-mazing roommate and not to mention best friend. Finally moved out of my mom's house for the second time but this time in a more thought out, beneficial-to-my-future kind of way. We had different expectations moving to Hattiesburg and were shortly let down. I had a few misconceptions about the people I thought I was going to get real close to and was deeply disappointed when I realized it wasn't going to turn out that way.Our outlook on friendships and how they should be didn't coincide at all. I guess it is just life's little way of reminding me to stop having such high expectations for people until I really know them for a while.Regardless of the little stump we had to face, it's been a lot of fun. Saturday night was a night my soul needed. Robert invited us to go eat at his parent's store with all the girls.I had steak a la mexicana. The food was delectable and hit just the right the spot.It was relaxing and very pleasant time.After a show at a local bar, Mandee and I reluctantly decided to go to the after party. I drank enough to get a good buzz but not enough to be incoherent.I'm pretty sure this is going to become mandatory for nights out. We had a lot of fun having really funny and interesting conversations with various people but mainly Roger and Mike. It's the first time I've felt where we've made a friendship connection with someone from here, and it wasn't just drunken banter and small talk like the type that tends to happen at parties. It was such a relief and I look forward to hanging out with them again soon. I'm trying to remain positive because it's the only thing that will let me get out of here alive. I'm sure things will only get better once I start the semester in January. I can't wait to meet more considerate,genuine, and fun to be around type people. Right now, I'm just ecstatic about my friendship with chandler flourishing again.We are back to being super close again. We go work out at least 4 times a week and kick our fat's ass. I would be at a loss without Jessica, Mandee and Chan. I really really miss Leslie and Kyttie and in a perfect world they would live here with us as well.
Wow, I hate to complain, but the love doctor must not be looking out for my well-being.It's been a long while after the worst heartbreak of my life, but what can ya do. I don't want someone to want to fuck me anymore, I just want someone to want to hold me all night.I was fine with being sexual with people for a while, granted my number hasn't increased much at all, but I used to be the type to only sleep with people if I was in a relationship with them. That changed for a year and I was fine with it then but my last little mishap i bit off more than I could chew. I don't like the way it's made me feel and since I'm in a vulnerable state,in a new place trying to get settled and having life throw canon balls from many directions, it affected me harder than it would've normally. I realized that I'm no longer going to sleep with any more men, especially undeserving ones. It didn't feel wrong for a long while but now it doesn't feel like me anymore and it doesn't feel right.My body is my temple. For being so impatient, I've sure had to wait a long while. So it continues....
onto better news: I received a chutes and ladders mini board game with my kid's happy meal from Wendy's tonight. Something tells me this will be our entertainment for boring lonely nights.