I've lost my buhdda today
well, I can't believe that I got so angry today over something so petty. I lost my Buddha over escorting a kid to the bathroom. granted I hated the kid. much less I praise individuality and independence, which children have neither, so I dislike almost all kids as well. But this one I dislike more so than the rest.
Basically I was asked to escort the kid to the bathroom and I literally decided to hate the situation. I knew it. But I couldn’t help it. I could have easily made the situation something fun, entertaining or even just blasé, but I felt my thought processes just directing straight towards anger. Passing by all these other options. I’ve lost my Buddha. Its so strange to be angry at something for me. Its such a rarity. Granted I do get angry from time to time, about once a year, but it is usually anger directed to my self. This is the first time I’ve been angry at something other than my self in like 8 years. I literally have adrenaline in my system because of it. I’m such a light weight when it comes to hate.
Basically I was asked to escort the kid to the bathroom and I literally decided to hate the situation. I knew it. But I couldn’t help it. I could have easily made the situation something fun, entertaining or even just blasé, but I felt my thought processes just directing straight towards anger. Passing by all these other options. I’ve lost my Buddha. Its so strange to be angry at something for me. Its such a rarity. Granted I do get angry from time to time, about once a year, but it is usually anger directed to my self. This is the first time I’ve been angry at something other than my self in like 8 years. I literally have adrenaline in my system because of it. I’m such a light weight when it comes to hate.