He Moves in Mysterious Ways - an Urban Legends short (RE-EDITED)
Edit Notes: After posting the original version of the story, I felt unhappy with the ending, so I decided to rewrite it. I even fixed a few typos along the way. I might tweak a few things later, but, for now, I am happy with what I have.
Edit Notes 2: Fixed spelling and grammar issues, made a few minor tweaks.
The following story was something I wrote more or less on impulse, with little prior planning. It emerged as an outgrowth of a line from another story that featured Jasmine Morikawa, a line about a friend who turned into a "fundie bitch." The results were... unexpected (even my conception of what the character looked like changed during the course of the story) but overall, I am happy with what came out.
Fair warning - the following story contains language that's more graphic than any story I posted before, and it briefly touches on potentially triggering subject matter. Just FYI.
As always, comments and criticisms are very much encouraged.
He Moves in Mysterious Ways
I didn’t know why I agreed to this. Jasmine Morikawa was everything I tried to not to be - a party girl with no sense of morals or self-control. I should be praying for her soul, not meeting her over coffee.
I turned my back on that life. I had a nice home, a good church, a safe job and a husband who really loves me. Jas was still going to clubs and sleeps around, and she didn’t see anything wrong with that. I could understand if she was younger, but at her age…
No. Jas was my friend. She tried to take care of me. She deserves a chance.
Lord, give me strength.
Jas showed up five minutes late wearing tight pants, flashy bracelets and a top that covered her arms but revealed plenty of cleavage. Her haircut belonged to someone ten years younger. She set her coffee down on the table and gave me a tight hug.
“Hi, Hilly!” she beamed as she pulled away. “Long time no see. You look amazing! How’s Terry? How’s everything?”
It was like nothing ever happened between us. Like I never called her a dyke and she never called me a fundie bitch. Like we were still meeting for coffee after soccer to dish about guys and compare notes.
“Terry is great,” I said. “He got a promotion a few weeks ago. He’s got a nice bonus, and we should be getting more vacation time in a few months.”
“That’s great! How are the kids?”
“Lila is learning how ride a bike. I wish she wouldn’t hurt herself so much, but she really wants to learn.”
“Aww,” Jas cooed. “Just like her mommy.”
“Just like her mommy,” I couldn’t help but smile. “Shane is going to be starting kindergarten. Terry and I were looking at Roycemore, but Terry thinks Chiaravalle might be a better fit. We’ll see.”
“So…private schools.” Jas’ smile fell.
“We want what’s best for our kids.”
“So the Evanston Township School District is not good enough for you?” Jas teased, but I could hear a hurt in her voice.
“ETS is fine,” I said. Damn it, I should not feel guilty about this. “But colleges are really competitive these days. We want our kids to have the best shot.”
“Hilly,” Jas shook her head. “Evanston Township High School is one of the best schools in Illinois.”
“One of the best public schools, Jas. We can’t settle for second best. Not when we have options. Wouldn’t you want the best option for your son?”
When Jas was nineteen, she gave birth to Toshi. And, say what you will about her, but she loved her child to pieces and tried her best to take care of him. Back when we were still in college, Kristie and I took turn babysitting him while Jas worked on term papers.
Last time I saw him, Toshi was ten years old. He was a lot like his mom - cheerful and openhearted. I was kind of jealous.
“I am a nurse, Hilly.” Jas rolled her eyes. “I couldn’t afford a private school even if I wanted to - which I don’t. Why would I want my son to turn into one of those private school assholes? Remember when you hated private school assholes? Wasn’t it you who said you wouldn’t fuck them if their dicks shot money?” I cringed, but thankfully, Jas quickly changed tact. “Besides, we both went to ETHS and we turned out great.”
“Jas, we were lucky we graduated at all,” I sighed. “All those late night parties, all the times we drove around looking for someone to buy us booze… I am amazed we got any school work done.”
“Hey, we worked hard and we played hard,” Jas shrugged. “Besides, you were way too smart to fail. You could bullshit out an essay on Sunday night and still have time to study for a test.”
“And I barely got any sleep. It wasn’t healthy.”
“No,” Jas nodded. “But at least it was fun.”
“Fun… That’s one way of putting it.”
“Oh, don’t give me that,” Jas raised her eyebrow. “You were the ringleader. You lost you anal virginity way before anyone else. You taught the rest of us how to suck dicks and use condoms. You walked stark naked through the guys locker room. You literally slept with half of the soccer team. And I don’t remember you complaining when Dan asked for a three…”
I had to cut her off: “Can we please not talk about this? Especially not in public.”
“Okay, okay.” Jas threw up her hands. “All I’m saying is that you enjoyed yourself. Nothing wrong with enjoying yourself, right?”
“Enjoying myself?” I said. “You know what I remember? I remember waking up next to my own vomit. I remember being so drunk that I wasn’t sure who I was fucking. I remember when I thought I was pregnant and I was scared out of my mind because I had no idea who the father was.” I felt the bile rising to my throat. “I remember offering to suck some fat fuck’s dick if he’d buy me booze. I remember when my parents came to surprise me in my dorm and walked in on Kristie fucking some guy she picked up in the laundry room. I remember all those times I woke up in the police station and had to wait for someone to bail me out. I remember that time Shay fed me a roofie and tried to rape me. If you and Dan didn’t drag him off me, he would have!”
I was shaking. My hands were shaking. God dam… No. No more cursing. I was better than that. I was better than that.
Jas reached into her purse and handed me a tissue. I didn’t even notice I was crying. My make-up must have been a total mess.
“I am sorry,” Jas said quietly. “I am so sorry.”
“Don’t be,” I took a few deep breaths. “It wasn’t your fault. I was the one who led him on. I was the one who put myself in the position…”
“That’s a load of crap, Hillary.” Jas’ expression hardened. “And you know it. Nobody made Shay do jack shit. He was just some dipshit who wouldn’t take no for an answer.”
“It doesn’t matter. If it weren’t Shay, it would have been someone else. I was lucky I survived. That whole lifestyle, with all the promiscuity and self-indulgence… It wasn’t healthy, it wasn’t good for me, and it definitely wasn’t right in the eyes of God.”
I took a deep breath: “I am glad I don’t live like that anymore. You have no idea how glad. And I want absolutely nothing to do with it.”
Jas looked at me with a mixture of pity and amusement: “So don’t. If you like how you live, live it up. Enjoy every moment of it.”
“You really mean it?”
“Of course.” There was that smile again. “Everyone should live their lives doing something they enjoy. If you don’t enjoy it, why do it?”
“You’re missing the point.” I said. How could someone be so close to the truth and yet so wrong? “This isn’t about doing what’s fun. It’s about doing what’s right.”
“Yeah, but what’s right for you isn’t right for everyone. I know you think I’m a huge sinner…”
“No, I…” I tried to protest, but Jas gave me a stern glance.
“You do, Hilly. We both know you do. And that’s fine. Me, I think I’m doing what I like. Dancing is a great way to blow off stress, and I like to keep up with popular music. I get to have sex with people I care about, and they take care of me. Life’s too short to bother with anyone who doesn’t give two shits about my feelings. Sure, sometimes I drink a little too much, but I never drink with strangers, so it works out.”
“And it doesn’t bother you? Going from person to person, never settling with anyone?”
“Not really,” Jas shrugged. “I mean, I’d love to have a serious relationship someday, but until then, why force it? And, to be honest, after what happened with Cheryl, I am not in any particular hurry.”
“What happened?” Last time I saw Jas, she and Cheryl were together, and they seemed pretty happy. In fact, that’s why we got into that horrible fight and why neither of us tried to speak to each other - until now.
“She wanted to marry me,” Jas sighed. “They’d just legalized same-sex marriage in Canada. She wanted to move to Toronto, build a new life there. I was worried about Toshi - he had friends here, and I knew he’d hate to leave them behind. So I said ‘no.’ and…that’s it, really. I wish it could have ended better, but…” she sighed again. “It happened. I spent way too much time crying about it already. Don’t want to do it anymore.”
I reached across the table and hugged her.
“I am sorry, Jas,” I said, and I meant it. Their relationship may have been a perversion in the eyes of God, but Jas was still my friend. Even after everything that happened between us, I hated to see her hurting.
“Thanks, Hilly,” she smiled weakly. “I’m fine. It’s been a while. I’m over it. It’s just… There’s still some scar tissue, you know?”
“Yeah….” Just because I used to lead a life of sin didn’t mean I was never in love.
We drank from our cups. The coffee was a bit cold, but I didn’t care, and I don’t think Jas did, either.
“So,” Jas broke the silence. “Do you have any good memories of the old days? Anything at all?”
“I don’t know…” I thought aloud. “I guess there was that time we took the South Shore down the to the Dunes and went up to Mount Baldy.”
“We could see Chicago from out there,” Jas smiled wistfully. “It looked so tiny.”
“It was so quiet. Just us and dunes.”
“At least until Kristie went running down to the beach and tripped,” Jas chuckled. “I thought we’d wake up the whole forest.”
“But running down after her was fun,” I couldn’t help but smile. “What about that time we went down to Lake Geneva with Dan and Kalim?”
“Oh yeah. We rented a boat and launched fireworks from the middle of the lake. God bless Wisconsin.”
“God bless Dan,” I said. “I can’t believe he managed to find us a cabin that didn’t cost an arm and a leg.”
“Dan’s always been very persuasive,” Jas chuckled. “What about your 18th birthday party?”
“We got stuck in Kenosha!” I had to point out.
“Yeah. But it turned out okay in the end, didn’t it?”
“I guess. Having a whole beach to ourselves was nice. And we made s’mores. I never made s’mores before.”
“See,” Jas smiled. “It wasn’t all drunken debauchery.”
“No, it wasn’t,” I said. “We might have been sinned, but at least we looked out for each other.” I sighed. “You guys were always there for me. Especially you and Kristie.”
“So were you. If weren’t for you, I would’ve given birth in your dorm room. I still can’t believe you didn’t get arrested for running so many red lights.”
“I didn’t even care,” I said. “I honestly didn’t. Lord, I was reckless.”
“But at least you were reckless for the right reasons.”
“I guess that’s true,” I allowed. “I guess it’s true.”
And, to be honest, out of all the stupid things I’ve done, this was one thing I didn’t regret at all.
Jas took another sip of coffee.
“It’s just…” she bit her lip. “I just hope you’re happy.”
“I am,” I assured her. “Terry is a great guy. He cares about me, and he doesn’t care about my past. I love my kids. I have a good job. I have security.”
“I hope that’s enough.”
“What do you mean?”
“Terry doesn’t know much about your past, does he?” Jas said.
“He knows as much as he needs to know,” which wasn’t a whole lot. Terry grew up in Glenview, and he almost never went down to the city. He was so very sheltered and, God help me, I planned to keep it that way.
“What about your new friends?” Jas’ eyes bore straight into me. “Do any of them know?”
“I may have mentioned a few things,” once or twice. They were curious about my sinful life, but, like Terry, they were so sheltered. Even mentioning sex felt like going a little too far.
“Does that ever bother you?”
“No! I built a new life with Terry! I like my new life!”
Jas smiled, but it was a very sad smile:
“So you don’t miss it at all?”
“I…” I wanted to say that no, I don’t miss any of it, but as I looked at my old friend, I realized that would be a lie. “I don’t want to go back. I just wish things didn’t end so badly. I guess… I always did wonder what happened to you and Toshi. He must be, what, fifteen?”
“Sixteen.”
“Of course. I should know, shouldn’t I?” I chuckled. “Remember when Toshi was little and we took turns babysitting him?” Jas nodded. “Remember how we used to talk about how we would raise our kids together?”
“Yeah…”
“It’s just…” I tried to gather the words together. “I don’t approve of everything you do.”
“That’s okay. I don’t approve of everything you do, either”
“I understand. But… that doesn’t mean we can’t see each other every once in a while, right?”
“Right,” Jas said. “We can play it by the ear.”
“We will.”
Jas grinned. Her happiness was infectious. Always has been. Sure, I was the ringleader, but she was the one who always had the most fun. She was always the one who hated holding grudges.
What does the Bible say about forgiving those who trespass against us?
“Jas,” I said. “I am sorry I called you a dyke.”
“I am sorry I called you a fundie bitch. And… all the other things I called you.”
“Same here.”
It was strange. In so many ways, we were so far apart. I don’t think we’ll ever be as close as we used to be. But after all this time, I discovered something I never knew I missed.
I came here expecting a temptation and I found a lost friend.
I guess I shouldn’t be surprised. I should have trusted Him more. I should have remembered that He would never lead me astray.
Truly, the Lord works in mysterious ways.
2011 (c) strannik01
Edit Notes 2: Fixed spelling and grammar issues, made a few minor tweaks.
The following story was something I wrote more or less on impulse, with little prior planning. It emerged as an outgrowth of a line from another story that featured Jasmine Morikawa, a line about a friend who turned into a "fundie bitch." The results were... unexpected (even my conception of what the character looked like changed during the course of the story) but overall, I am happy with what came out.
Fair warning - the following story contains language that's more graphic than any story I posted before, and it briefly touches on potentially triggering subject matter. Just FYI.
As always, comments and criticisms are very much encouraged.
He Moves in Mysterious Ways
I didn’t know why I agreed to this. Jasmine Morikawa was everything I tried to not to be - a party girl with no sense of morals or self-control. I should be praying for her soul, not meeting her over coffee.
I turned my back on that life. I had a nice home, a good church, a safe job and a husband who really loves me. Jas was still going to clubs and sleeps around, and she didn’t see anything wrong with that. I could understand if she was younger, but at her age…
No. Jas was my friend. She tried to take care of me. She deserves a chance.
Lord, give me strength.
Jas showed up five minutes late wearing tight pants, flashy bracelets and a top that covered her arms but revealed plenty of cleavage. Her haircut belonged to someone ten years younger. She set her coffee down on the table and gave me a tight hug.
“Hi, Hilly!” she beamed as she pulled away. “Long time no see. You look amazing! How’s Terry? How’s everything?”
It was like nothing ever happened between us. Like I never called her a dyke and she never called me a fundie bitch. Like we were still meeting for coffee after soccer to dish about guys and compare notes.
“Terry is great,” I said. “He got a promotion a few weeks ago. He’s got a nice bonus, and we should be getting more vacation time in a few months.”
“That’s great! How are the kids?”
“Lila is learning how ride a bike. I wish she wouldn’t hurt herself so much, but she really wants to learn.”
“Aww,” Jas cooed. “Just like her mommy.”
“Just like her mommy,” I couldn’t help but smile. “Shane is going to be starting kindergarten. Terry and I were looking at Roycemore, but Terry thinks Chiaravalle might be a better fit. We’ll see.”
“So…private schools.” Jas’ smile fell.
“We want what’s best for our kids.”
“So the Evanston Township School District is not good enough for you?” Jas teased, but I could hear a hurt in her voice.
“ETS is fine,” I said. Damn it, I should not feel guilty about this. “But colleges are really competitive these days. We want our kids to have the best shot.”
“Hilly,” Jas shook her head. “Evanston Township High School is one of the best schools in Illinois.”
“One of the best public schools, Jas. We can’t settle for second best. Not when we have options. Wouldn’t you want the best option for your son?”
When Jas was nineteen, she gave birth to Toshi. And, say what you will about her, but she loved her child to pieces and tried her best to take care of him. Back when we were still in college, Kristie and I took turn babysitting him while Jas worked on term papers.
Last time I saw him, Toshi was ten years old. He was a lot like his mom - cheerful and openhearted. I was kind of jealous.
“I am a nurse, Hilly.” Jas rolled her eyes. “I couldn’t afford a private school even if I wanted to - which I don’t. Why would I want my son to turn into one of those private school assholes? Remember when you hated private school assholes? Wasn’t it you who said you wouldn’t fuck them if their dicks shot money?” I cringed, but thankfully, Jas quickly changed tact. “Besides, we both went to ETHS and we turned out great.”
“Jas, we were lucky we graduated at all,” I sighed. “All those late night parties, all the times we drove around looking for someone to buy us booze… I am amazed we got any school work done.”
“Hey, we worked hard and we played hard,” Jas shrugged. “Besides, you were way too smart to fail. You could bullshit out an essay on Sunday night and still have time to study for a test.”
“And I barely got any sleep. It wasn’t healthy.”
“No,” Jas nodded. “But at least it was fun.”
“Fun… That’s one way of putting it.”
“Oh, don’t give me that,” Jas raised her eyebrow. “You were the ringleader. You lost you anal virginity way before anyone else. You taught the rest of us how to suck dicks and use condoms. You walked stark naked through the guys locker room. You literally slept with half of the soccer team. And I don’t remember you complaining when Dan asked for a three…”
I had to cut her off: “Can we please not talk about this? Especially not in public.”
“Okay, okay.” Jas threw up her hands. “All I’m saying is that you enjoyed yourself. Nothing wrong with enjoying yourself, right?”
“Enjoying myself?” I said. “You know what I remember? I remember waking up next to my own vomit. I remember being so drunk that I wasn’t sure who I was fucking. I remember when I thought I was pregnant and I was scared out of my mind because I had no idea who the father was.” I felt the bile rising to my throat. “I remember offering to suck some fat fuck’s dick if he’d buy me booze. I remember when my parents came to surprise me in my dorm and walked in on Kristie fucking some guy she picked up in the laundry room. I remember all those times I woke up in the police station and had to wait for someone to bail me out. I remember that time Shay fed me a roofie and tried to rape me. If you and Dan didn’t drag him off me, he would have!”
I was shaking. My hands were shaking. God dam… No. No more cursing. I was better than that. I was better than that.
Jas reached into her purse and handed me a tissue. I didn’t even notice I was crying. My make-up must have been a total mess.
“I am sorry,” Jas said quietly. “I am so sorry.”
“Don’t be,” I took a few deep breaths. “It wasn’t your fault. I was the one who led him on. I was the one who put myself in the position…”
“That’s a load of crap, Hillary.” Jas’ expression hardened. “And you know it. Nobody made Shay do jack shit. He was just some dipshit who wouldn’t take no for an answer.”
“It doesn’t matter. If it weren’t Shay, it would have been someone else. I was lucky I survived. That whole lifestyle, with all the promiscuity and self-indulgence… It wasn’t healthy, it wasn’t good for me, and it definitely wasn’t right in the eyes of God.”
I took a deep breath: “I am glad I don’t live like that anymore. You have no idea how glad. And I want absolutely nothing to do with it.”
Jas looked at me with a mixture of pity and amusement: “So don’t. If you like how you live, live it up. Enjoy every moment of it.”
“You really mean it?”
“Of course.” There was that smile again. “Everyone should live their lives doing something they enjoy. If you don’t enjoy it, why do it?”
“You’re missing the point.” I said. How could someone be so close to the truth and yet so wrong? “This isn’t about doing what’s fun. It’s about doing what’s right.”
“Yeah, but what’s right for you isn’t right for everyone. I know you think I’m a huge sinner…”
“No, I…” I tried to protest, but Jas gave me a stern glance.
“You do, Hilly. We both know you do. And that’s fine. Me, I think I’m doing what I like. Dancing is a great way to blow off stress, and I like to keep up with popular music. I get to have sex with people I care about, and they take care of me. Life’s too short to bother with anyone who doesn’t give two shits about my feelings. Sure, sometimes I drink a little too much, but I never drink with strangers, so it works out.”
“And it doesn’t bother you? Going from person to person, never settling with anyone?”
“Not really,” Jas shrugged. “I mean, I’d love to have a serious relationship someday, but until then, why force it? And, to be honest, after what happened with Cheryl, I am not in any particular hurry.”
“What happened?” Last time I saw Jas, she and Cheryl were together, and they seemed pretty happy. In fact, that’s why we got into that horrible fight and why neither of us tried to speak to each other - until now.
“She wanted to marry me,” Jas sighed. “They’d just legalized same-sex marriage in Canada. She wanted to move to Toronto, build a new life there. I was worried about Toshi - he had friends here, and I knew he’d hate to leave them behind. So I said ‘no.’ and…that’s it, really. I wish it could have ended better, but…” she sighed again. “It happened. I spent way too much time crying about it already. Don’t want to do it anymore.”
I reached across the table and hugged her.
“I am sorry, Jas,” I said, and I meant it. Their relationship may have been a perversion in the eyes of God, but Jas was still my friend. Even after everything that happened between us, I hated to see her hurting.
“Thanks, Hilly,” she smiled weakly. “I’m fine. It’s been a while. I’m over it. It’s just… There’s still some scar tissue, you know?”
“Yeah….” Just because I used to lead a life of sin didn’t mean I was never in love.
We drank from our cups. The coffee was a bit cold, but I didn’t care, and I don’t think Jas did, either.
“So,” Jas broke the silence. “Do you have any good memories of the old days? Anything at all?”
“I don’t know…” I thought aloud. “I guess there was that time we took the South Shore down the to the Dunes and went up to Mount Baldy.”
“We could see Chicago from out there,” Jas smiled wistfully. “It looked so tiny.”
“It was so quiet. Just us and dunes.”
“At least until Kristie went running down to the beach and tripped,” Jas chuckled. “I thought we’d wake up the whole forest.”
“But running down after her was fun,” I couldn’t help but smile. “What about that time we went down to Lake Geneva with Dan and Kalim?”
“Oh yeah. We rented a boat and launched fireworks from the middle of the lake. God bless Wisconsin.”
“God bless Dan,” I said. “I can’t believe he managed to find us a cabin that didn’t cost an arm and a leg.”
“Dan’s always been very persuasive,” Jas chuckled. “What about your 18th birthday party?”
“We got stuck in Kenosha!” I had to point out.
“Yeah. But it turned out okay in the end, didn’t it?”
“I guess. Having a whole beach to ourselves was nice. And we made s’mores. I never made s’mores before.”
“See,” Jas smiled. “It wasn’t all drunken debauchery.”
“No, it wasn’t,” I said. “We might have been sinned, but at least we looked out for each other.” I sighed. “You guys were always there for me. Especially you and Kristie.”
“So were you. If weren’t for you, I would’ve given birth in your dorm room. I still can’t believe you didn’t get arrested for running so many red lights.”
“I didn’t even care,” I said. “I honestly didn’t. Lord, I was reckless.”
“But at least you were reckless for the right reasons.”
“I guess that’s true,” I allowed. “I guess it’s true.”
And, to be honest, out of all the stupid things I’ve done, this was one thing I didn’t regret at all.
Jas took another sip of coffee.
“It’s just…” she bit her lip. “I just hope you’re happy.”
“I am,” I assured her. “Terry is a great guy. He cares about me, and he doesn’t care about my past. I love my kids. I have a good job. I have security.”
“I hope that’s enough.”
“What do you mean?”
“Terry doesn’t know much about your past, does he?” Jas said.
“He knows as much as he needs to know,” which wasn’t a whole lot. Terry grew up in Glenview, and he almost never went down to the city. He was so very sheltered and, God help me, I planned to keep it that way.
“What about your new friends?” Jas’ eyes bore straight into me. “Do any of them know?”
“I may have mentioned a few things,” once or twice. They were curious about my sinful life, but, like Terry, they were so sheltered. Even mentioning sex felt like going a little too far.
“Does that ever bother you?”
“No! I built a new life with Terry! I like my new life!”
Jas smiled, but it was a very sad smile:
“So you don’t miss it at all?”
“I…” I wanted to say that no, I don’t miss any of it, but as I looked at my old friend, I realized that would be a lie. “I don’t want to go back. I just wish things didn’t end so badly. I guess… I always did wonder what happened to you and Toshi. He must be, what, fifteen?”
“Sixteen.”
“Of course. I should know, shouldn’t I?” I chuckled. “Remember when Toshi was little and we took turns babysitting him?” Jas nodded. “Remember how we used to talk about how we would raise our kids together?”
“Yeah…”
“It’s just…” I tried to gather the words together. “I don’t approve of everything you do.”
“That’s okay. I don’t approve of everything you do, either”
“I understand. But… that doesn’t mean we can’t see each other every once in a while, right?”
“Right,” Jas said. “We can play it by the ear.”
“We will.”
Jas grinned. Her happiness was infectious. Always has been. Sure, I was the ringleader, but she was the one who always had the most fun. She was always the one who hated holding grudges.
What does the Bible say about forgiving those who trespass against us?
“Jas,” I said. “I am sorry I called you a dyke.”
“I am sorry I called you a fundie bitch. And… all the other things I called you.”
“Same here.”
It was strange. In so many ways, we were so far apart. I don’t think we’ll ever be as close as we used to be. But after all this time, I discovered something I never knew I missed.
I came here expecting a temptation and I found a lost friend.
I guess I shouldn’t be surprised. I should have trusted Him more. I should have remembered that He would never lead me astray.
Truly, the Lord works in mysterious ways.
2011 (c) strannik01