On college education, family expectations and creative pursuits
My mom recently did a post touching on how people with disabilities are treated and the implicit expectations society (and Russian society in particular) places on them. It's a very interesting post, and I would recommend that any Russian speakers reading it check it out.
But what I wanted to touch on in this post is something my mom wrote in the final paragraph.
I am surprised when all of my Russian relatives' questions about Vlad begin and end with "is he even planning to finish college?" The work, the creative pursuits - this doesn't concern them. But no diploma? Horror! Meanwhile, working at a job you hate is just normal.
Vlad being vladiatorr, my brother. Who finished college without getting a diploma because (to make a long story short) he didn't get a passing grade in some courses. He could retake them, but in over a year since he graduated, he never really tried, preferring to focus on his work.
Reading this, I couldn't help but remember that, growing up, I knew, simply knew that every one of my relatives expected me to, at the very least, graduate from college. It's not that terribly unusual for Russian families - you either go to college or trade school. Heck, that's not even a uniquely ex-Soviet thing - here in America, not graduating from college carries certain connotations. Not getting some kind of post-high school education is a sign of failure. Or, at the very least, underachievement.
Thing is, I definitely counted my mom among the relatives who expected me to finish college and get a real job. While my grandmothers indulged me when I talked about wanting to be a writer, it always came with an implicit asterisk. The "but you do realize that you're going to have to get a real job if it doesn't work out - which it probably won't" asterisk. And my mom never did even that. I never got an impression that she ever thought I had even a ghost of a chance.
My mom's cousin - whom I've always called Aunt Anya - was the only one in my family who ever encouraged me, who told me that pursuing something creative was worthwhile. Which is why, despite the fact that she's not a saint (oh boy is she ever not a saint) part of me still has a soft spot for her.
Now, in fairness, my mom has... evolved on the issue a bit. As she has written extensively in her LJ, her world view and values have changed some, thanks in large part to the fact that living in America showed her that things don't have to be done the way she grew up learning they were supposed to be done. But even then... Even as, by the time annanov and vladiatorr started going o college, she started talking about how, first and foremost, she wanted us to be happy, part of me never quite bought it. Even after I started writing for Chicago Journal, part of me kept expecting her to say "why don't you stop with this journalism silliness and get a job that earns decent money."
I went to college because I was sure my mom expected it. I still wanted to be a writer, so I chose courses (that weren't required) based on what would come in handy as a writer - fiction classes, some psychology classes (so that I could develop characters better), some philosophy classes (for themes), some social sciences classes (for research background) and a journalism class (because, at the time, I still saw journalism as something I'd have to do to earn a living until I'm a successful writer). I took some Russian lit classes to get my mom off my back about the fact that I haven't read classic Tolstoy and Dostoyevskiy novels (now that's an expectation that's more Russian intelligentsia specific - you have to read the classics). The experience, btw, made me realize that I vastly preferred Dostoyevskiy to Tolstoy, whom I've found to be a self-righteous, moralizing...
And I'm going to stop right there before the entire Russian LJ-dom eats me alive.
In any case - I chose to get an English degree because its requirements allowed me to take the courses I wanted to take. I didn't realy give any thought to how it would affect my career prospects.
As I often like to tell people, I stumbled into this journalism thing almost by accident. When I was a senior, a student in one of my fiction writing classes was recruiting people for Chicago Flame, one of the university's official newspapers. I decided to apply, just to see how it would feel and found, to my surprise, that I actually liked it. A lot. This was something I could actually see myself doing for a living. I still wanted to be a writer, mind you, but I knew that getting anywhere as a writer would take time, and if I had to have a day job, journalism wasn't too bad. Not at all.
Of course, by the time I discovered that, it was too late for me to take any more journalism-related courses. Or to tweak my major. And once I graduated, I had no idea how to go about getting a job at a newspaper other than applying for openings. Which, given that I graduated in 2008, was a touch proposition.
(If I could tell my younger self anything, it's to look for freelance opportunities under every bloody nook and cranny. There is a method to getting freelance gigs - you try to pitch a story that you have a good reason to believe the editor would like, and you show some evidence that you can write for a newspaper/magazine. It doesn't work every time, but it would've saved me so much trouble.)
warren_ellis managed to become successful comic book writer turned novelist without going to college. He famously said that you don't need college to be a writer. And I think he's right. Not that I regret going to college - I never would've met tweelore, never would've had a reason to explore Chicago and never would've discovered that I liked being a journalist if I didn't. Plus, a lot of those classes were useful, and taking those Russian lit classes finally got my mom off my back about not reading War and Peace.
And I did have some good times in college. Met some pretty cool people. I have some regrets about stuff I did after college, but actually getting a college education... can't think of any. Not any big ones.
As for my brother... My mom was really worried about what Vlad was going to do after he didn't properly graduate. Some of this worry even made it into her public posts. But I think that, now that Vlad played an important role in behind-the-scenes planning for a so-far-successful new restaurant, which is a good career milestone, my mom is okay with my brother not getting a diploma for a few more years.
Hey - nobody ever said practicing what you preach was easy.
But what I wanted to touch on in this post is something my mom wrote in the final paragraph.
I am surprised when all of my Russian relatives' questions about Vlad begin and end with "is he even planning to finish college?" The work, the creative pursuits - this doesn't concern them. But no diploma? Horror! Meanwhile, working at a job you hate is just normal.
Vlad being vladiatorr, my brother. Who finished college without getting a diploma because (to make a long story short) he didn't get a passing grade in some courses. He could retake them, but in over a year since he graduated, he never really tried, preferring to focus on his work.
Reading this, I couldn't help but remember that, growing up, I knew, simply knew that every one of my relatives expected me to, at the very least, graduate from college. It's not that terribly unusual for Russian families - you either go to college or trade school. Heck, that's not even a uniquely ex-Soviet thing - here in America, not graduating from college carries certain connotations. Not getting some kind of post-high school education is a sign of failure. Or, at the very least, underachievement.
Thing is, I definitely counted my mom among the relatives who expected me to finish college and get a real job. While my grandmothers indulged me when I talked about wanting to be a writer, it always came with an implicit asterisk. The "but you do realize that you're going to have to get a real job if it doesn't work out - which it probably won't" asterisk. And my mom never did even that. I never got an impression that she ever thought I had even a ghost of a chance.
My mom's cousin - whom I've always called Aunt Anya - was the only one in my family who ever encouraged me, who told me that pursuing something creative was worthwhile. Which is why, despite the fact that she's not a saint (oh boy is she ever not a saint) part of me still has a soft spot for her.
Now, in fairness, my mom has... evolved on the issue a bit. As she has written extensively in her LJ, her world view and values have changed some, thanks in large part to the fact that living in America showed her that things don't have to be done the way she grew up learning they were supposed to be done. But even then... Even as, by the time annanov and vladiatorr started going o college, she started talking about how, first and foremost, she wanted us to be happy, part of me never quite bought it. Even after I started writing for Chicago Journal, part of me kept expecting her to say "why don't you stop with this journalism silliness and get a job that earns decent money."
I went to college because I was sure my mom expected it. I still wanted to be a writer, so I chose courses (that weren't required) based on what would come in handy as a writer - fiction classes, some psychology classes (so that I could develop characters better), some philosophy classes (for themes), some social sciences classes (for research background) and a journalism class (because, at the time, I still saw journalism as something I'd have to do to earn a living until I'm a successful writer). I took some Russian lit classes to get my mom off my back about the fact that I haven't read classic Tolstoy and Dostoyevskiy novels (now that's an expectation that's more Russian intelligentsia specific - you have to read the classics). The experience, btw, made me realize that I vastly preferred Dostoyevskiy to Tolstoy, whom I've found to be a self-righteous, moralizing...
And I'm going to stop right there before the entire Russian LJ-dom eats me alive.
In any case - I chose to get an English degree because its requirements allowed me to take the courses I wanted to take. I didn't realy give any thought to how it would affect my career prospects.
As I often like to tell people, I stumbled into this journalism thing almost by accident. When I was a senior, a student in one of my fiction writing classes was recruiting people for Chicago Flame, one of the university's official newspapers. I decided to apply, just to see how it would feel and found, to my surprise, that I actually liked it. A lot. This was something I could actually see myself doing for a living. I still wanted to be a writer, mind you, but I knew that getting anywhere as a writer would take time, and if I had to have a day job, journalism wasn't too bad. Not at all.
Of course, by the time I discovered that, it was too late for me to take any more journalism-related courses. Or to tweak my major. And once I graduated, I had no idea how to go about getting a job at a newspaper other than applying for openings. Which, given that I graduated in 2008, was a touch proposition.
(If I could tell my younger self anything, it's to look for freelance opportunities under every bloody nook and cranny. There is a method to getting freelance gigs - you try to pitch a story that you have a good reason to believe the editor would like, and you show some evidence that you can write for a newspaper/magazine. It doesn't work every time, but it would've saved me so much trouble.)
warren_ellis managed to become successful comic book writer turned novelist without going to college. He famously said that you don't need college to be a writer. And I think he's right. Not that I regret going to college - I never would've met tweelore, never would've had a reason to explore Chicago and never would've discovered that I liked being a journalist if I didn't. Plus, a lot of those classes were useful, and taking those Russian lit classes finally got my mom off my back about not reading War and Peace.
And I did have some good times in college. Met some pretty cool people. I have some regrets about stuff I did after college, but actually getting a college education... can't think of any. Not any big ones.
As for my brother... My mom was really worried about what Vlad was going to do after he didn't properly graduate. Some of this worry even made it into her public posts. But I think that, now that Vlad played an important role in behind-the-scenes planning for a so-far-successful new restaurant, which is a good career milestone, my mom is okay with my brother not getting a diploma for a few more years.
Hey - nobody ever said practicing what you preach was easy.