waking up early
I turned the alarm off this morning. I have to be at work at 1, and my alarm clock is always preconfigured to wake me up at 8:30 so I can get to work on time. I'm kind of glad I only have to work four hours today. I'm seriously exhausted and tomorrow's the big festival at the community center. I'm looking forward to painting a mural with other kids. I've realized that painting alone is a lot more aggravating than painting with other people, even if they have different skill levels. The festival is going to be fun, hopefully. Ona said she wanted to come but doesn't know how to get there. I'm not going to get my hopes up and believe that she's going to be there for sure. I get disappointed when I do that.
Especially since Joe couldn't come, and that irritated me because he can make time for his other friends, friends that live farther away and isn't as close to. It bothers me that I ask him to really come once out of the entire summer and he can't. Whatever, his loss. I'm too irritated to be reasonable right now. Forget it, he told me that it was because his parents wouldn't let him take the car into such a bad neighborhood, and that I had to think twice before jumping to conclusions about how he was "too busy".
Last night I thought about how I was a junior now. Does maturation come naturally or does it come through experience? Sometimes I look at myself and feel that I haven't changed all that much. I wonder what everyone else is doing and how they've changed over the summer. It seems like two months can do a lot to one person, depending on what they're doing. If they're having a job, for example, they're learning work ethic, the value of money, and being independent. It's kind of exciting that I'm learning those things. I've always felt like a little kid - and right now, I really just want to grow up. Maybe it's because I feel like it's silly to be one of those people who can get embarrassed or does embarrassing things easily. I just want to be mature, cool and confident. Seems like an almost impossible goal, especially since all the girls in my advisory find me hilarious.
I was working on biology for a few hours yesterday. I really need to get that finished, and then I'm pretty much done for the summer. I even have a few weeks left to review Spanish, which I need to do desperately. I feel like I've forgotten a lot of the tenses. I'm scared of my intense schedule. I hope I can handle the oncoming year.
Got back from work and watched three episodes of Avatar: The Last Airbender, "The Siege of the North" and "The Desert". I'm wanting to know more about what happens to Zuko and Iroh, sometimes more than what happens to Aaang and his crew. It's because I think the heroes are going to survive and be happy in the end, but eventually the anti-heroes are going to either join the heroes or die doing the right thing. I'm anxious about the newest episode, happening on September 15th, "The Secret of the Fire Nation".
Aang in his avatar state.
Iroh complains and Zuko finally says that they should rest for awhile.
Aang gets angry at the sandbenders for stealing Appa.
Katara weirded out by Sokka's offer of crazy cactus juice.
They're searching for Zuko and Iroh.
Since I woke up so early, I had time to customize my desktop. I've realized I change my desktop a lot. This is what my desktop looks like now. It has Marvin from from The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy as the background, and GTK/Metacity themes from Gnome-Look, specifically Luminance as the GTK theme by Lokheed and Vistabut as the Windows Borders theme. Right after I did this I had to download some Avatar episodes and head off to work..
Work was intense today. I was working on my lino-cut for four hours straight. We didn't even have lunch break. Tomorrow is the Sunfest at Clarendon Community Center. I can't wait! I have to be there at 12. I'm going to be helping people paint a mural. I talked with Ona yesterday about it. While I was talking to her, when she said that she wanted to come to the Sunfest even after I said it wasn't a big deal, I burst into tears.
And then I know, deep down, that I'm weak, and I hate myself for being that way.
Especially since Joe couldn't come, and that irritated me because he can make time for his other friends, friends that live farther away and isn't as close to. It bothers me that I ask him to really come once out of the entire summer and he can't. Whatever, his loss. I'm too irritated to be reasonable right now. Forget it, he told me that it was because his parents wouldn't let him take the car into such a bad neighborhood, and that I had to think twice before jumping to conclusions about how he was "too busy".
Last night I thought about how I was a junior now. Does maturation come naturally or does it come through experience? Sometimes I look at myself and feel that I haven't changed all that much. I wonder what everyone else is doing and how they've changed over the summer. It seems like two months can do a lot to one person, depending on what they're doing. If they're having a job, for example, they're learning work ethic, the value of money, and being independent. It's kind of exciting that I'm learning those things. I've always felt like a little kid - and right now, I really just want to grow up. Maybe it's because I feel like it's silly to be one of those people who can get embarrassed or does embarrassing things easily. I just want to be mature, cool and confident. Seems like an almost impossible goal, especially since all the girls in my advisory find me hilarious.
I was working on biology for a few hours yesterday. I really need to get that finished, and then I'm pretty much done for the summer. I even have a few weeks left to review Spanish, which I need to do desperately. I feel like I've forgotten a lot of the tenses. I'm scared of my intense schedule. I hope I can handle the oncoming year.
Got back from work and watched three episodes of Avatar: The Last Airbender, "The Siege of the North" and "The Desert". I'm wanting to know more about what happens to Zuko and Iroh, sometimes more than what happens to Aaang and his crew. It's because I think the heroes are going to survive and be happy in the end, but eventually the anti-heroes are going to either join the heroes or die doing the right thing. I'm anxious about the newest episode, happening on September 15th, "The Secret of the Fire Nation".
Aang in his avatar state.
Iroh complains and Zuko finally says that they should rest for awhile.
Aang gets angry at the sandbenders for stealing Appa.
Katara weirded out by Sokka's offer of crazy cactus juice.
They're searching for Zuko and Iroh.
Since I woke up so early, I had time to customize my desktop. I've realized I change my desktop a lot. This is what my desktop looks like now. It has Marvin from from The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy as the background, and GTK/Metacity themes from Gnome-Look, specifically Luminance as the GTK theme by Lokheed and Vistabut as the Windows Borders theme. Right after I did this I had to download some Avatar episodes and head off to work..
Work was intense today. I was working on my lino-cut for four hours straight. We didn't even have lunch break. Tomorrow is the Sunfest at Clarendon Community Center. I can't wait! I have to be there at 12. I'm going to be helping people paint a mural. I talked with Ona yesterday about it. While I was talking to her, when she said that she wanted to come to the Sunfest even after I said it wasn't a big deal, I burst into tears.
And then I know, deep down, that I'm weak, and I hate myself for being that way.