whos ready for another alcohol fueled entry?
me apparently. uhm everything..sucks. and rejection sucks. even if you dnt kno wwhat it feels like, im sure you can at leasst pretend to imagine. maybe nt. i wish ii had a soul so i could cry these days. but no. no tears never come. not for a long time. i just kind of stare at things. and yes i do resort to drugs and alcohol to deal with my problems. if you have a problem with that, then youre ridiculous. we should never base our judgements of each other on our faults. what kind of person would yo be if you hated someone just because they couldnt cope iwth shit without outside forces. you would be uninformed. and a jerk. and have no idea whatkind of shit this is. what this is like. to be alone. to be in this fucking family where currently 1/2 of our income and stability as we know it depends on the drug test my dad is waiting to receive. hopefully it will come back negative but it all depends on a $40 drink from natures nook.
people say friends dont destroy each other, what do they know about friends/
nothing obviously. the one thing about this shit that poelple dont know is about the field. the playing grounds. when youre with a bunch of people, everones on different levels. they assume shit about each other. but its like a big plow comes and levels the ground for miles. were all the same now. were all down. laying down. we can see each other for who we really are and choose whether or nt to accept it. thats why i do this. this is why my family is based on this. we cant be real. this is real for us. this is who we are, truely.
so back to what i was originally saying. vulnerability in front of others can be risky and not always work in our favor. this is rejection. real rejection. this is when its unbearable. flat out..youre not good enough. not only that, someone else IS good enough. and are going to be there just as long as me. just fucking there. and max wore his shirt so it doesnt even smell like him anymore. i officially have nothing.
my boyfriend is in jail and really doesnt like me that much anyways.
people say friends dont destroy each other, what do they know about friends/
nothing obviously. the one thing about this shit that poelple dont know is about the field. the playing grounds. when youre with a bunch of people, everones on different levels. they assume shit about each other. but its like a big plow comes and levels the ground for miles. were all the same now. were all down. laying down. we can see each other for who we really are and choose whether or nt to accept it. thats why i do this. this is why my family is based on this. we cant be real. this is real for us. this is who we are, truely.
so back to what i was originally saying. vulnerability in front of others can be risky and not always work in our favor. this is rejection. real rejection. this is when its unbearable. flat out..youre not good enough. not only that, someone else IS good enough. and are going to be there just as long as me. just fucking there. and max wore his shirt so it doesnt even smell like him anymore. i officially have nothing.
my boyfriend is in jail and really doesnt like me that much anyways.