i need to vent. this isnt for attention,or for people to say,"i'm here" its for me-to get everything
i need to vent. this isnt for attention,or for people to say,"i'm here", its for me-to get everything out.
i dont know what the hell is wrong with me latly. i feel like i'm consistantly puting on a smile.. like i put on clothes in the morning. its summer and i really should be all happy and OMG ITS SUMMER! but i'm just not. and its not for any particular reason. i feel like a huge part of me isnt there.. i feel like i used to get much more passionate about things. i used to feel like i was really where i was. now, everything is a blur. i'm always thinking about something else, or not even thinking at all. i wish things were back to the way they were before everything this year happend. i loved this year & i love all my friends.. but there was so much bad stuff that happend. my outlook on things has completly changed. i've changed. and i havent decided weather it is better or worse. my feelings towards everything are so confusing. i feel like there is nothing that i can control anymore, i cant control my feelings,whats going on around me, and just everything. there is so much going on, i wish that it would all just go away.
in a perfect world; no one would be sick, i wouldnt have to get surgery, we'd be together, our whole group of friends wouldnt have so much fights & being two faced and all that stuff.. and people wouldnt be so afraid to show their emotions.. too bad that kind of stuff only happens in movies. if one story of my life could have a fairy tale ending, i think i'd die from shock. everyone thinks that because i live in the manor my life is perfect. i am SO sick of sterotypical people. get over yourself and realize that there is more to life then money & a big house. [ps my house isnt even that big] idk. i feel some what better, that i've actually got this all off my chest. but idk. i hope that everything will get cleared up.
once again; this isnt for attention. i needed to vent. so dont give me bullshit about how "ur life is great blah blah blah u want attention".
kbye
i dont know what the hell is wrong with me latly. i feel like i'm consistantly puting on a smile.. like i put on clothes in the morning. its summer and i really should be all happy and OMG ITS SUMMER! but i'm just not. and its not for any particular reason. i feel like a huge part of me isnt there.. i feel like i used to get much more passionate about things. i used to feel like i was really where i was. now, everything is a blur. i'm always thinking about something else, or not even thinking at all. i wish things were back to the way they were before everything this year happend. i loved this year & i love all my friends.. but there was so much bad stuff that happend. my outlook on things has completly changed. i've changed. and i havent decided weather it is better or worse. my feelings towards everything are so confusing. i feel like there is nothing that i can control anymore, i cant control my feelings,whats going on around me, and just everything. there is so much going on, i wish that it would all just go away.
in a perfect world; no one would be sick, i wouldnt have to get surgery, we'd be together, our whole group of friends wouldnt have so much fights & being two faced and all that stuff.. and people wouldnt be so afraid to show their emotions.. too bad that kind of stuff only happens in movies. if one story of my life could have a fairy tale ending, i think i'd die from shock. everyone thinks that because i live in the manor my life is perfect. i am SO sick of sterotypical people. get over yourself and realize that there is more to life then money & a big house. [ps my house isnt even that big] idk. i feel some what better, that i've actually got this all off my chest. but idk. i hope that everything will get cleared up.
once again; this isnt for attention. i needed to vent. so dont give me bullshit about how "ur life is great blah blah blah u want attention".
kbye