Post Not-So-Mortem on the Bright Red Candy-Like Button
Last week, there was a crisis aboard the Murgatroid when Lothar pressed a certain button...
"Um guys, you know that Button that was clearly marked 'Do not press' behind the Red Tape that read 'Do not cross and press the button' behind the barrier that was clearly Marked 'Stay out Lothar' that was behind the new brick wall covered in anthrax with the flesh eating weasels, on the Deck that the lift does not stop at near the automatic phazers that fire on anyone trying to gain access? Well, I hit that button, accidentally. Sorry."
I'd like to explain further exactly how we came so close to losing the ship. First of all, the red button in question was not anything inherently dangerous; only a fool would actually have a single button which could destroy the ship and make its existence known -- Anyone could have predicted that all of those warnings not to press the button would have drawn Lothar like a moth to flame. This button was set up as a distraction, so that when Lothar felt like wreaking some havoc, there would be a safe target for him.
However, there is an old Terran punchline of wisdom that nothing can ever be truly foolproof... On his way through all of the obstacles we placed in Lothar's way, to convince him that something vital was down there, he actually did hit something vital inadvertently. He hit a couple of plasma conduits on his way to the "deck that the lift does not stop at" and he -- you guessed it -- crossed the streams. I believe the vast quantities of alcohol we're currently stealing appropriating from the soon-to-be-ex-nebula ought to keep him us safe long enough to complete repairs, and set up more defenses and distractions. Perhaps a scratching post made of pure neutronium ought to take him a while to destroy...?
"Um guys, you know that Button that was clearly marked 'Do not press' behind the Red Tape that read 'Do not cross and press the button' behind the barrier that was clearly Marked 'Stay out Lothar' that was behind the new brick wall covered in anthrax with the flesh eating weasels, on the Deck that the lift does not stop at near the automatic phazers that fire on anyone trying to gain access? Well, I hit that button, accidentally. Sorry."
I'd like to explain further exactly how we came so close to losing the ship. First of all, the red button in question was not anything inherently dangerous; only a fool would actually have a single button which could destroy the ship and make its existence known -- Anyone could have predicted that all of those warnings not to press the button would have drawn Lothar like a moth to flame. This button was set up as a distraction, so that when Lothar felt like wreaking some havoc, there would be a safe target for him.
However, there is an old Terran punchline of wisdom that nothing can ever be truly foolproof... On his way through all of the obstacles we placed in Lothar's way, to convince him that something vital was down there, he actually did hit something vital inadvertently. He hit a couple of plasma conduits on his way to the "deck that the lift does not stop at" and he -- you guessed it -- crossed the streams. I believe the vast quantities of alcohol we're currently stealing appropriating from the soon-to-be-ex-nebula ought to keep him us safe long enough to complete repairs, and set up more defenses and distractions. Perhaps a scratching post made of pure neutronium ought to take him a while to destroy...?