(no subject)
Bad things:
Still in mourning. I'd expected to be sad, but I hadn't expected to be so dang depressed, and to constantly be forgetting they died and then remembering again. Every time I think about the approaching holidays, every time I think about the weekend since I usually went to see Grandpop on my day off to drive him places... and then there's relief that the stress is finally over, and then thinking I shouldn't be feeling relief that people are dead and a whole 31 flavors of unhappy emotions. Which will get better, but isn't yet. I'm gonna have to rewrite every grief scene in every story I ever did; this is a much more complicated emotional ordeal than I thought.
On top of that the city is experiencing an outbreak of the Epic Puking Sickness which set my OCD back about ten years. I can't go to math anymore, which sucks. I missed some work, but I think I can force myself to go back if I wear a mask too. Which will not do anything good for my dignity! -_- Aaaaarg. This too will get better. In a month or so. If I can keep going to work that long.
Paranoia is setting in that bad things come in groups and now something worse will happen just to continue the trend. Like God looks down and says, "You think you've got rotten life events? I'll show you rotten life events!" I don't actually think there are any nasty gods like that controlling our fates but you never know!
Good things:
Writing continues like mad for its sanity-preserving effects. I have filled nine notebooks and started on the tenth.
Con is coming up. As long as nothing awful happens to cancel that, there should be fun ahead. (It's over Halloween, Ry, you wanna come?) I'm crafting like crazy to have stuff to sell, and that at least is enjoyable. Unicorn horns, shiny headpieces, forehead moons, resin jewelry, sailor tiaras, and earwings! Our table will be full of pretty colors!
My Little Ponies at work feel like a sign from a benevolent deity that I have not been abandoned. (Yeah, I get really superstitious when rotten life circumstances happen.) My lovely manager has assigned a new person to my department so I don't have to worry quite so much about doing 6 man-hours of work in 3 hours. Hopefully I'll have time to get the book section into the sort of neatness that my pride demands.
Still in mourning. I'd expected to be sad, but I hadn't expected to be so dang depressed, and to constantly be forgetting they died and then remembering again. Every time I think about the approaching holidays, every time I think about the weekend since I usually went to see Grandpop on my day off to drive him places... and then there's relief that the stress is finally over, and then thinking I shouldn't be feeling relief that people are dead and a whole 31 flavors of unhappy emotions. Which will get better, but isn't yet. I'm gonna have to rewrite every grief scene in every story I ever did; this is a much more complicated emotional ordeal than I thought.
On top of that the city is experiencing an outbreak of the Epic Puking Sickness which set my OCD back about ten years. I can't go to math anymore, which sucks. I missed some work, but I think I can force myself to go back if I wear a mask too. Which will not do anything good for my dignity! -_- Aaaaarg. This too will get better. In a month or so. If I can keep going to work that long.
Paranoia is setting in that bad things come in groups and now something worse will happen just to continue the trend. Like God looks down and says, "You think you've got rotten life events? I'll show you rotten life events!" I don't actually think there are any nasty gods like that controlling our fates but you never know!
Good things:
Writing continues like mad for its sanity-preserving effects. I have filled nine notebooks and started on the tenth.
Con is coming up. As long as nothing awful happens to cancel that, there should be fun ahead. (It's over Halloween, Ry, you wanna come?) I'm crafting like crazy to have stuff to sell, and that at least is enjoyable. Unicorn horns, shiny headpieces, forehead moons, resin jewelry, sailor tiaras, and earwings! Our table will be full of pretty colors!
My Little Ponies at work feel like a sign from a benevolent deity that I have not been abandoned. (Yeah, I get really superstitious when rotten life circumstances happen.) My lovely manager has assigned a new person to my department so I don't have to worry quite so much about doing 6 man-hours of work in 3 hours. Hopefully I'll have time to get the book section into the sort of neatness that my pride demands.