What Was i Thinking?

Mar 04, 2006 20:22

When He Needed me the most i broke things off. People understand why i did...but thats not who i am. i should not have done it ( Read more... )

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... tjsparkyboi March 8 2006, 09:21:33 UTC
To the one who will always be MY Marky,

There are times, dearest one, that I couldn't sleep because I didn't understand how cold hearted you could be. I knew you still loved me in the same way and it broke my heart to see you denying it. I asked you if you wanted me over you, and you told me yes, multiple times. So, I fought every instinct and I got over you. I can honestly say that I have no desire to date you anymore. That may sound harsh, but that's the way I feel, darling.

Now, for the second part:

Mark Eric Baum, I love you with all my heart, which I have from the first day I saw you escape to your room as I watched Ladder 49 with Chris. We have so much to live for, you have no idea. We may not be able to be lovers, but we are totally cabable of being BEST FRIENDS. EVERYTHING we used to do, minus the sex, hun. Don't kid yourself... we never really had sex anyways, silly. It'll be the unbreakable duo, Mark and TJ, the once gay couple who everyone looked up to. But, now, instead of being a couple role model, we are going to become the role model of how NOT to lose the love of your life. We will hold onto each other in friendship, if you are willing to do that with me, Marky.

I'm here, waiting for you to run with open arms into my embrace to embrace you as brothers do. You are my family. My brothers were taken away from me and now I can finally have the older brother I've always dreamed of, if you are willing to fill that position. I love you, Marky Baum. Always have and I always will. Just, sometimes, love grows in different ways.

And now, I go and crawl into bed, next to you. You may be an ass, but you are my best friend and I'm going to trust you with all of my life. I may like Dave, but you are still my bestie.

In Brotherly Love,

Timothy James Horstmann

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Re: ... stormlovindj March 8 2006, 23:05:01 UTC
Never had sex huh? so what was that all day marathon in chris' bed, or sll those times in royal oak...hell all those times at my parents house..... i mean come on there was an open condom wrapper in the middle of the floor that my mom found.... :-P

Love Ya Too...

-MEB

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