Fic: i-80 west, part six (Brittany/Santana, R)

[stopstartstall]

Title: i-80 west, part six
Characters: Brittany, Mike, Brittany/Santana
Length: 8.5k
Rating: R
Summary: Brittany and Santana graduate high school and spend one last summer in Lima before leaving for college.
A/N: Super thanks, as always, to JJ for giving me all the notes in the world about Utah and going above and beyond in beta duties in helping me

Comments

[displacedaway]

Once again, I love the way you are able to build tension due to both your fantastic pacing and turn of phrase. It was wonderful getting to see the story unfold from Brittany's perspective: watching her lament over Santana's emotional state, finally figuring out what had caused it, and then having that moment of truly understanding everything Santana had always felt and feared in a way she was previously incapable of understanding due to her outlook on the world. It's sort of heartbreaking for Brittany to get to that place but I think it's an important moment for her, too.

This particular paragraph stood out to me because it's a perfect exposition of both Brittany and Santana's characters in a mere two sentences. Well done.

She doesn’t understand why the girl back at the store looked at her the way she did, why she hated her the way she did, when all she did was tell the truth. She remembers her mom telling her when she was little that no-one would hate you for telling the truth, but then she thinks of Santana all through high school and knows that isn’t true, because Santana told the truth to everyone and they all thought she was a bitch, and that made her lie about the biggest truth of all just so people wouldn’t hate her for that too.

Looking forward to seeing how Santana is incorporated back into the fold and how the tension looking between Santana and Brittany throughout parts 5 and 6 is resolved. Another fantastic update.

[stopstartstall]

Thank you so much, and for taking the time to leave such a thoughtful comment. I always wanted this story to be about both of them, so it was important to me that Brittany had this moment; I think it's easy to lose one or the other's feelings in a one-pov story. I'm glad you felt that it worked so well, sad!Brittany aside.