(Untitled)

[willhavewings]

Who: The eight homunculi and any victims that come their way.
What: Homunculi on the hunt
When: Any time
Where: Anywhere
Warnings: Man eating giant: cockroaches, praying mantis, pitcher plant, rhino and chameleon and the women who love them.

Comments

[princemunculus]

[Location: SURPRISE ME
Time: ikd like 3am
Encounter: RHINO]

[willhavewings]

[Just in a random street somewhere, an extremely grumpy man carrying an extremely large cherry slurpy thing, which was bought out of habit which has pissed Cornelius even more because he DOESN'T WANT IT but he WANTS to WANT IT ARGH, anyway, in his absent-minded rage, he has just bumped into Ling/Greed whoever it is today with enough force to dump cherry ice over both of them.]

ASSHOLE!

[princemunculus]

[It's Ling! And he is now covered in cherry ice]

Aiyaaa, I'm sorry! I didn't see you there! Gaaaahhhh, that's cold...

[willhavewings]

I KNOW!

['Of course it's cold dumbass, if it wasn't cold I'd be more pissed off because I PAID for it to be COLD GOD I HATE YOU YOU STUPID SON OF A BITCH.']

ASSHOLE!
[Instantly Cornelius draws back a fist, which expands into a giant rhino foot halfway through the swing, all the momentum changing in a bizarre way from a punch into a stomp.]

[princemunculus]

[STOMPED]

[FLOORED]

[IS PRETTY COHERENT FOR A GUY THAT JUST GOT RHINO STOMPED]

H-hey, there's no need for violence!

[willhavewings]

ARGH SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP!

[He's just going to starting going crazy with stomping right now.]

[princemunculus]

[Egads Ling rolls out of the way and leaps to his feet]

Geeze, you're the one that ran into me!

[willhavewings]

[Okay, so he has a point but Cornelius doesn't care, so, human head scowling between his rhino ears, he just growls before lowering his horn and-

ZAAAAWOOOOSH. His rhino rockets activate!]

[princemunculus]

[WOW IT'S A GOOD THING I HAVE NINJA REFLEXES]

[Ling jumps RIGHT OVER THAT GUY]

[willhavewings]

[ZAAAAWOOOOOOOOOSH Cornelius cannot turn around right now, and thus smashes straight into a shop, destroying the wall and ruining its wonderful stock of alien underwear. Now that he has stopped, he turns around and stares right at Ling, some sort of thirty cupped bra hanging off of his horn.]

ASSHOLE.

[princemunculus]

[WELL I GUESS IT'S SERIOUS BUSINESS TIME]

[Ling takes a defensive stance, and thanks to Greed being a bro, his body is now carbonized from the neck down.]

I don't want to have to hurt you, but you're simply being unreasonable!

[willhavewings]

I'LL EAT YOUR CHILDREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEN

[Cornelius is clearly in no mood for shenanigans, firmly planting his front legs into the ground, activating the jets but not moving. Basically, he's cutting out the moment where the jets aren't at maximum thrust, so when he lifts his front legs-

he's suddenly accelerating twice as fast he was before.]

[princemunculus]

Hate to disappoint you, but I haven't got any!

[BAM LING'S HIT RIGHT IN THE CHEST BY RHINO FACE. It pushes him back a few feet before Ling's able to dig his heels into the floor (YES HE JUST DUG HIS HEELS DIRECTLY INTO A METAL FLOOR), and grabs this asshole by the horn, using the momentum to HURL THE FUCKER DOWN THE HALL WATCH OUT FOR THAT WALL]

[DON'T BLINK ONLOOKERS, YOU WILL MISS THIS]

[willhavewings]

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAASSShole!

[Cornelius is tossed down the hall, but thanks to being so large, he actually manages to catch himself on the side walls, cutting out all the momentum to stop him from smashing into the back.

Okay, new tactic. Swinging his horn down, Cornelius smashes a hole in the floor, and drops onto the level below. And a few seconds later, said horn slices up out of the ground under Ling, like some sort of cartoon sword shark.]

[princemunculus]

[hops out of the way of the horn and

somehow ends up on the back of this rhino guy]

Oh?

[willhavewings]

Huh?
[Instantly he starts flailing around, going around in circles, jumping around, shaking, generally going crazy go nuts disco style.]