Jan 05, 2006 22:57
hey so i've been out tuesday through today and i have a feeling i'll be home tomorrow too. god i'm gonna have so much makeup work! and i don't even know if i got my schedule changed or not. and if i did i hope it's not messed up.. oh what a silly thing to hope for. they're gonna mess up aren't they.. yes it's useless. okay anyways so how is everybody? good? good. if you're not good, post a comment and tell me why not! i've been out of the loop so i don't know what's going on with everyone. well i'll fill you in on what's going down at my place of residence. i feel like crap. fever is up to 104.5 this morning. now i'm nauseas. i seriously considered checking into a hospital to get food through a gastric feeding tube because i can't eat and i am starved. also the muscles around my waist (my abs, lower back, sides, etc) are extremely sore from coughing so hard and for so long. so now anything that i do that invloved my mid section can't be done because it hurts. to the point now where even to cough i start to cry. terrible no?
and my mom is finally losing her hair. large chunks of it are missing. i know she's scared but this was to be expected. and oh right. i forgot to mention this before. last week, my dad said our family has been through enough and that we didn't deserve to have my mom go through cancer. so i told my dad i know how he feels but cancer doesn't choose you based on whether you deserve it or not. and my dad said he knew but it still wasn't fair. and i told him "if there's one thing i've learned so far, it's life is never fair. people rob stores and don't get caught. people wipe out cities filled with innocent people. some discriminate based on religion, politics, and race. so no life isn't fair. but there are people going through much worse things than we are and we should be happy it's what it is and nothing more. look at amirah. amirah didn't deserve to have a brain tumor and go into a coma. she was one of the most brilliant people i knew. she was also the nicest, very talented, and wasn't selfish. she helped me with french when shecould have been with friends or eating her lunch or doing homework and studying. but no she had a brain tumor. and let's just be happy mom hasn't been in a coma for half a year now. also, be happy mom isn't like terry shiavo. we could have been put in the position of making the choice of pulling the plug or not." and you know what my dad's response was? "how do you know she won't be like that?" i was shocked my dad actually thought my mom was at risk for going brain dead. so i explained that i know cancer can be a scary thing. and i hate to call it just this or just that, but it's just breast cancer. if it were brain cancer or melanoma or something like that, then my gosh i'd be much more worried. but also i keep a positive outlook on the whole thing. it's a learning experience. i told him if he developed some kind of cancer that wasn't severe but was equally as bad as my mom's form of breast cancer, he'd have to do a much better job at not being so negative. i pulled up some psychology sites that explained why maintaining a positive attitude was important. so that's how i spent my monday afternoon.
tuesday, wed, and today i spent it sleeping until about 10 or so and then reading my favorite series of books. it's called sweep. it's about a witch named morgan rowlands. she learns she was adopted and all about her birth mom and everything. she also finds out she's a blood witch, meaning she inherited tons of ancient magickal powers from her ancestors. and then her first boyfriend's mom turned out to be evil and only wanted morgan's powers. and then they go away. she meets another guy, her first boyfriends step brother. and they date. they overcome many obstacles, etc etc. face evil. face her real birth dad (not the guy her mom married. she'd had an affair) and found out he's the leader of the darkest coven that existed. and terrible things happened. hunter died in an accident. a ferry sunk that he was on. morgan married, had a kid, her husband died. and then got clues more than a decade late that hunter was alive. morgan, her daughter, and hunter's cousin sky all found hunter, defeated an evil witch who was morgans step sister from hell (from her father's marriage) and they lived happily ever after. to tell you the truth... i am in love with that guy hunter. he's on the cover of one of the 14 books (plus a novel) and mmmmm he's gorgeous. not only that but in the book you see he's a good guy.
okay wow i'm freezing and i need to take my medicine and go to sleep. goodnight all.