Man, Me and Denzel
We go way back. Okay, I can't remember my first Denzel movie, actually, but we are just the best of friends. We get along well, I like him, I like his style, I always feel all happy when it's a Denzel movie... He's a guy I can count on, you know? There's really only one flaw to our lovely relationship.
DENZEL KEEPS DYING ON ME.
Denzel, why you gotta be like that all the time? Now, don't freak out, for I will not say what movie it is that he dies in.
PSYCH! Well, you clicked on the cut, so I bet you wanted to know. I went to see The Book of Eli with my dad and brother and Denzel played me, man. I mean, okay, he died after completing his mission but I really thought he was going to make it. Okay, it was more like I thought he'd die, then it turns out he lived, then he made it to his destination, and then he died for reals. It was so sad. I hate it when he dies, like on Man On Fire. Denzel, we gotta talk about this. I have the same problem with DiCaprio except I don't care as much about him (seriously, I think he has 2 requirements for all his contracts: he must be directed by Martin Scorsese and he must die by the end of the movie).
But yeah, me and Denzel. I don't want him to die for real anytime soon. STAY ALIVE. DON'T HEATH OUT ON ME. And please, please, PLEASE do not get all Scientology on me either. You stay away from Tom Cruise and John Travolta and, yes, even Will Smith if necessary. Don't break my heart, Denzel. I like typing out your name.
Denzel.
In other news, I am a huge sissy. Like, worse than before. I go to the movies, see violent scenes, and just look away. I just can't handle it, and I KNOW my tolerance has gone down from before. Even the sounds of people hitting each other get me all "UGH NO." Especially the squishy, liquidy sounds, like when they stab someone.
OH! I found a new drama I like! FINALLY! I was in this huge slump. It's another Taiwanese one with Ella from S.H.E. and Jerry Yan from Meteor Garden and it's called Down With Love. The story's pretty typical, about a cool lawyer guy who got stuck with his brother's cute but bratty (not really) kids because the brother died and he needs a nanny but all the nannies keep falling for him because he's kewl~ so Ella's sister, who is his secretary and also money crazy because their mom died and their dad left and Ella keeps getting fired from jobs, is all, "Hey, my sister will do anything. She will babysit your brats AND she won't fall for you because she is a lesbian!" So he's like "Fine, whatever, but she can't quit in, like, a year!" because he ran into Ella before and, of course, they dislike each other due to various misunderstandings and he wants her to experience suffering through bratty children. And, of course, Ella is totally not a lesbian (another misunderstanding), so you know they are the main couple.
And I love Ella! I do! I liked her a lot in the Taiwanese Hana Kimi and I just like her. She's one of those Denzels for me, where it's just like, "You and me, man." I have few actors that are like that for me, so I treasure you both, Denzel and Ella. Don't be letting me down and having this be a crappy drama. And don't die of some disease either.
DENZEL KEEPS DYING ON ME.
Denzel, why you gotta be like that all the time? Now, don't freak out, for I will not say what movie it is that he dies in.
PSYCH! Well, you clicked on the cut, so I bet you wanted to know. I went to see The Book of Eli with my dad and brother and Denzel played me, man. I mean, okay, he died after completing his mission but I really thought he was going to make it. Okay, it was more like I thought he'd die, then it turns out he lived, then he made it to his destination, and then he died for reals. It was so sad. I hate it when he dies, like on Man On Fire. Denzel, we gotta talk about this. I have the same problem with DiCaprio except I don't care as much about him (seriously, I think he has 2 requirements for all his contracts: he must be directed by Martin Scorsese and he must die by the end of the movie).
But yeah, me and Denzel. I don't want him to die for real anytime soon. STAY ALIVE. DON'T HEATH OUT ON ME. And please, please, PLEASE do not get all Scientology on me either. You stay away from Tom Cruise and John Travolta and, yes, even Will Smith if necessary. Don't break my heart, Denzel. I like typing out your name.
Denzel.
In other news, I am a huge sissy. Like, worse than before. I go to the movies, see violent scenes, and just look away. I just can't handle it, and I KNOW my tolerance has gone down from before. Even the sounds of people hitting each other get me all "UGH NO." Especially the squishy, liquidy sounds, like when they stab someone.
OH! I found a new drama I like! FINALLY! I was in this huge slump. It's another Taiwanese one with Ella from S.H.E. and Jerry Yan from Meteor Garden and it's called Down With Love. The story's pretty typical, about a cool lawyer guy who got stuck with his brother's cute but bratty (not really) kids because the brother died and he needs a nanny but all the nannies keep falling for him because he's kewl~ so Ella's sister, who is his secretary and also money crazy because their mom died and their dad left and Ella keeps getting fired from jobs, is all, "Hey, my sister will do anything. She will babysit your brats AND she won't fall for you because she is a lesbian!" So he's like "Fine, whatever, but she can't quit in, like, a year!" because he ran into Ella before and, of course, they dislike each other due to various misunderstandings and he wants her to experience suffering through bratty children. And, of course, Ella is totally not a lesbian (another misunderstanding), so you know they are the main couple.
And I love Ella! I do! I liked her a lot in the Taiwanese Hana Kimi and I just like her. She's one of those Denzels for me, where it's just like, "You and me, man." I have few actors that are like that for me, so I treasure you both, Denzel and Ella. Don't be letting me down and having this be a crappy drama. And don't die of some disease either.