21st Printing

[stokerwasahack]

Having mirrors installed on every vertical plane in your apartment becomes an interesting experience when your dog has never seen herself in one. I suppose the City thought it was hilarious to surround a vampire with reflective surfaces. For the record, my dog didn't and proceeded to attach herself to my side. She was better in the evening,

Comments

[shutupsammy]

The fact that you can see yourself in a mirror only means you don't have a single excuse for a fourth of your wardrobe to be red. Just FYI, buddy.

[stokerwasahack]

I was unaware you were keeping track.

[shutupsammy]

I pay attention to details. Surprise.

[stokerwasahack]

Then we have a problem, because you've either spent an obscene amount of time stalking me or been poking around my closet. I think I find the latter more disturbing.

[shutupsammy]

I also turn over people's papers when they leave the room.

[stokerwasahack]

Terrifying. You're the James Bond of supernatural investigation without the taste.

[shutupsammy]

Shut it. I clean up fine.

So, this your way of addressing the whole 'vampires have no souls' ballyhoo back a few days?

[stokerwasahack]

Frankly, it's coincidence. Reflections mean nothing; the demon that attacked my condo in Toronto had one in the glass. If I have no soul, then why am I not cast out when I enter the Lord's House to pray?

[shutupsammy]

So you're just clearing up some more oh-so-damaging to your reputation misconceptions again as you do on what is apparently a schedule?

I've seen demons in churches. Churches don't mean squat. 'My house is not built with wood and nails nor with brick and mortar,' etcetera.

[stokerwasahack]

Call my agent. She'll give you my schedule. I believe we're doing crosses and crucifixes next, followed by, "Vampires, Running Water, and You."

Churches are a place of gathering for the faithful, a place to focus and strengthen belief. That means a great deal.

[shutupsammy]

Running water thing is a myth. No shit. Seeing as your kind would have been royally screwed ever since the Romans invented the aqueduct.

It means a hell of a lot. But a tulpa isn't the same thing as the hand of God or something. Not that I'm suggesting you don't got a soul.

[stokerwasahack]

Who knows? There could be a world in which indoor plumbing saved humanity from being overrun by bloodthirsty legions of darkness.

I've been told that the hand of God is faith, at least in my world, and though I'm loathe to admit it, the claim comes from a credible source.

[shutupsammy]

And there's a world out there where I listen to Huey Lewis and the News. There's a world where I'm married. And one where I died slipping in the shower. There's probably one where I'm a female real-estate agent who exorcises ghosts as her night job. None of those are right here, right now.

A credible source? I've met the hands of God where I come from. They're dicks.

[stokerwasahack]

What a coincidence. So are the hands of ancient Egyptian gods.

How is your guardian angel lately?

[shutupsammy]

Nothing good ever came out of Egypt. Or the rest of the whole damn area, for that matter. I'm convinced of it.

Cagey. Superior. Nosy. A lot like you, actually, except for the part where he dresses like he wants to consult me about my grandma's funeral. Don't know which I like better. When he's always where I can talk to him here, or when he's always fucking off for months at a time and keeping mum about it at home.

[stokerwasahack]

Regrettably, I was forced to leave before I could properly enjoy the sights.

You're the most pleasant conversationalist. Nearly a match for him. I can see why you were paired together.