Angel for false_prophecy
The summer was passing so slowly; and for a vampire, that was saying something. usually, vampires had not much of a concept of time, but... the days dragged by, day after day.
She was gone... Buffy had died. And I had been busy enjoying the sun, instead of helping her. She had died saving her sister, saving the world, while I was just playing in fields, and-
And rescuing Cordy.
I turned away from the window, looking through the dark room. For a while, I had been thinking about going to Nepal or someplace, for a quiet retreat, but... I hadn't. For some reason, I felt like I couldn't go anywhere.
I knew Buffy and I had nothing to do with each other; hell, I had been the one to set my foot down that firmly last year. We were still friends... but she was dead.
I sat on the edge of the bed, setting my face in my palms.
She was gone. We might not have been lovers anymore, but... we were soulmates. She would always be in my heart. And I would always feel that I should have been there to help her. She should have told me that she needed help. Why hadn't she?
On an intellectual level, I knew it wasn't my fault. She was the Slayer; this was her kind of job. Not to mention, she was her own person; she had always done things her own way, beating the odds. There would have been nothing I could have done to stop her for sacrificing herself for someone she loved. Hell, I would have done the same thing.
Then why did I still feel like I had failed her somehow?
She was gone... Buffy had died. And I had been busy enjoying the sun, instead of helping her. She had died saving her sister, saving the world, while I was just playing in fields, and-
And rescuing Cordy.
I turned away from the window, looking through the dark room. For a while, I had been thinking about going to Nepal or someplace, for a quiet retreat, but... I hadn't. For some reason, I felt like I couldn't go anywhere.
I knew Buffy and I had nothing to do with each other; hell, I had been the one to set my foot down that firmly last year. We were still friends... but she was dead.
I sat on the edge of the bed, setting my face in my palms.
She was gone. We might not have been lovers anymore, but... we were soulmates. She would always be in my heart. And I would always feel that I should have been there to help her. She should have told me that she needed help. Why hadn't she?
On an intellectual level, I knew it wasn't my fault. She was the Slayer; this was her kind of job. Not to mention, she was her own person; she had always done things her own way, beating the odds. There would have been nothing I could have done to stop her for sacrificing herself for someone she loved. Hell, I would have done the same thing.
Then why did I still feel like I had failed her somehow?