i dont know
im drained of energy. im drained of life. everythign that enables me to leave myself. is starting to lose its powers. to allow me to travel to another place. i dont understand why im feelign this way. i feel ... nothing. no emotions. placid like. cant stand this house. cant stand this family. i just need to escape. when u think u can count on someone, u cant. theyre "too busy, sorry" dont have time for you. ur just not important enough. stop knocking on the door, if i dont answer, get the hint and leave me alone. i need to go to sleep...an extremly long long long sleep. so much on my mind, yet there isnt anything in there. i cant think of anything. then why do u feel like this? i dont know. why dont u want to talk to anyone. i dont know. why do u feel like shit. i dont know. why is ur face long. why does ur stomach hurt. why doesnt anyone seem to care. why do u keep sighing. why do u stare off in space. why do u want to escape. why does he wait. why doesnt she smile. why is she still persistent. why does she do that. why doesnt she. why do u say that. wat does it mean. why am i thinking that. do i...? why are u crying. i just... dont know. having people like my friends make my life so much better. when im feelin down or low. i can say things, and some will understand, some will never know. yet u have this feeling of security around them. im just so in love with some of my friends. im so blessed to have them and to know them. to be able to be part of them. to these people, which will never be able to get their signaficance in my life, i thank you. doing some things that u avoid and try so hard not to do, in the end is the best way to do it. dont hide. be urself. the weight of your world comes crashing down on you. and if u hide, it only crumbles even more. ur friends seem to lift it up off you. its not the world that is on ur shoulders, its your world. no one elses. and who else can fight it but you. the creator of it.