Tilling My Own Grave To Keep Me Level
So yeah we are at color change no. 1. I think I will stick with this for a while though I need to do something about the subject bar being a little bigger so it doesnt run into the body of the text. Aside from that I kinf of like the color scheme... for now.
So... whats new... well I am contenueing on a stint of unemployment that has lasted 5 months now. It needs to end son because money is geting exceedingly tight. I'm starting to think that eating might become optional soon. I wish I could say I have had some kind of success but well I haven't. Most places I try for are too far away for the pay that they are offering, not paying anywhere near enough to survive on, require a drivers liscense which I dont have (and can't get), require some kind of experience, are part time only, have a schedule that doesn't fit with public transportation, or any combo of the above. Then when I do get any kind of recognition or more importantly a cal back which in the past 5 months has amounted to 2, they find some reason not to hire me. The job marlet sucks right now and I am starting to suffer because of it. Right now it all boils down to money... and my lack there of. Iv'e been getting the slap in the face that is unemployment which still has a good amount of time to go before it runs out but it is by no means enough to live on. Three quarters of it alone goen to cover rent and bills... which leaves me with next to nothing to do anything else on. I hate being in this situation right now but well... what can I do? I think the biggest insult though this year was when one of my friends told me that I wasn't looking at getting layed off in the right economic light. I should be glad or some shit because the company was going to save money? What the hell kind of shit is that. I'm sitting here wondering how I am going to cover rent and eat and stil have the financial backing to do anything else and I should be happy that some fuck is saving money?
The whole working systekm in general pisses me off some times. We the working people go in and do our jobs for scraps and its the owners and sometimes managers who reap the benifits monatariluy. While we are here on the ground level trying to get by they are the ones who hold our futures oin the balance and recieve better compensation for it. Why should I have to go in and do something for a wage just above survival so someone can make a shit-ton (comparitively speaking) and have the option of if he feels like it to just can me one day. When do I have the chance save for some kind of future? When do I get some of the luxeries of life? When do I get medical insurence? Why should I strive to try and make the company more profitable when I KNOW I wont see anything for it? Call me a commie if you want to but damn it pisses me off when looking at it. The truely sad part is the amount of people who go about their job every day and don't care. The blinded masses who get thrown a few trinkets to distract them form asking questions and to keep them on task. Maybe give them a glimpse of better things and promise them they might get em but in truth will more than likely never see them.
Ok... enough marxist ranting for one day... but there will probably be more.
with the aforementioned unemployment I have been thinnking about trying to get into college. Some people think this is a good thing and some people are telling me it won't work because of my age and lack of trying to get into it earleir when I got out of high school. Thanks for the support there on the secoind one guys.... it's really apprieaciated... I have been giving it some thought though and it sounds like a good idea. Iv'e been wanting to talk it over with The Girlfriend but haven't been able to get her to even aknoweledge my requests for wanting to talk about this. That doesn't suprise me too much though... now... We haven't really sat down and talked in forever... oh sure there is email here and there but that isn't the same as just sitting there and talking. I have had some friends who when hearing that try to suggest maybe I should consider moving on but well for the forseeable future I won't give up on her. I just wish she was around more so I could once again kknow what I am not giving up on. Im thinking college might be a good thing but I am also thinking that it might affect things between us negitively with her finishing up soon and me looking at just now considering to even start. Yeha the robably sounds like a stupid thing to worry about but well its enough to keep me up at nite sometimes.
Aside from all the above shit on my mind right now which that is pretty much just scratching the surface... things have been pretty uch uneventful. Halloween was um... yeah... The high point of my weekend was going to the St. Arnold's Brewery tour. St Arnold's is a micxro brewery in houston that makes some killer beers and will more than likely never be available outside of Texas which is a shame because the stuff is GOOD!!! Aside from that it was pretty much the usual routine of boredom. I might go into discussing the usual boredom some other time but for now its time to end this thing. This weekend though has promise to be "interesting". I will go into that later this week.
So... whats new... well I am contenueing on a stint of unemployment that has lasted 5 months now. It needs to end son because money is geting exceedingly tight. I'm starting to think that eating might become optional soon. I wish I could say I have had some kind of success but well I haven't. Most places I try for are too far away for the pay that they are offering, not paying anywhere near enough to survive on, require a drivers liscense which I dont have (and can't get), require some kind of experience, are part time only, have a schedule that doesn't fit with public transportation, or any combo of the above. Then when I do get any kind of recognition or more importantly a cal back which in the past 5 months has amounted to 2, they find some reason not to hire me. The job marlet sucks right now and I am starting to suffer because of it. Right now it all boils down to money... and my lack there of. Iv'e been getting the slap in the face that is unemployment which still has a good amount of time to go before it runs out but it is by no means enough to live on. Three quarters of it alone goen to cover rent and bills... which leaves me with next to nothing to do anything else on. I hate being in this situation right now but well... what can I do? I think the biggest insult though this year was when one of my friends told me that I wasn't looking at getting layed off in the right economic light. I should be glad or some shit because the company was going to save money? What the hell kind of shit is that. I'm sitting here wondering how I am going to cover rent and eat and stil have the financial backing to do anything else and I should be happy that some fuck is saving money?
The whole working systekm in general pisses me off some times. We the working people go in and do our jobs for scraps and its the owners and sometimes managers who reap the benifits monatariluy. While we are here on the ground level trying to get by they are the ones who hold our futures oin the balance and recieve better compensation for it. Why should I have to go in and do something for a wage just above survival so someone can make a shit-ton (comparitively speaking) and have the option of if he feels like it to just can me one day. When do I have the chance save for some kind of future? When do I get some of the luxeries of life? When do I get medical insurence? Why should I strive to try and make the company more profitable when I KNOW I wont see anything for it? Call me a commie if you want to but damn it pisses me off when looking at it. The truely sad part is the amount of people who go about their job every day and don't care. The blinded masses who get thrown a few trinkets to distract them form asking questions and to keep them on task. Maybe give them a glimpse of better things and promise them they might get em but in truth will more than likely never see them.
Ok... enough marxist ranting for one day... but there will probably be more.
with the aforementioned unemployment I have been thinnking about trying to get into college. Some people think this is a good thing and some people are telling me it won't work because of my age and lack of trying to get into it earleir when I got out of high school. Thanks for the support there on the secoind one guys.... it's really apprieaciated... I have been giving it some thought though and it sounds like a good idea. Iv'e been wanting to talk it over with The Girlfriend but haven't been able to get her to even aknoweledge my requests for wanting to talk about this. That doesn't suprise me too much though... now... We haven't really sat down and talked in forever... oh sure there is email here and there but that isn't the same as just sitting there and talking. I have had some friends who when hearing that try to suggest maybe I should consider moving on but well for the forseeable future I won't give up on her. I just wish she was around more so I could once again kknow what I am not giving up on. Im thinking college might be a good thing but I am also thinking that it might affect things between us negitively with her finishing up soon and me looking at just now considering to even start. Yeha the robably sounds like a stupid thing to worry about but well its enough to keep me up at nite sometimes.
Aside from all the above shit on my mind right now which that is pretty much just scratching the surface... things have been pretty uch uneventful. Halloween was um... yeah... The high point of my weekend was going to the St. Arnold's Brewery tour. St Arnold's is a micxro brewery in houston that makes some killer beers and will more than likely never be available outside of Texas which is a shame because the stuff is GOOD!!! Aside from that it was pretty much the usual routine of boredom. I might go into discussing the usual boredom some other time but for now its time to end this thing. This weekend though has promise to be "interesting". I will go into that later this week.