If you don't expect too much from me, you might not be let down
So today has been a day. I missed the premiere of "My Perogative" on TRL, by like 2 minutes.FUCKERS! Oh well, I'll just catch it tomorrow *breathe, just breathe* And then I try downloading it, and am almost half way through (as I'm on dial up that takes a hella long time too) and the server got reset. FUCKERS!!ajekslfjsd;flkjasdflkjasdkflj!! God durn I hate dial up with a passion. All you people who are going "EW you have dial up" just eat a banana or something, I live out in the sticks and we don't have broadband here, so yeah.
I cleaned my house today , like pretty well, scrubbed the floors, dusted, vaccummed, even cleaned my toilet. I know you all are like "you don't do that regularly". Well yes I do, at least once a week, because I hate nasty smelling toilets, and it seems that when you live with guys the toilet always smells nasty. Bad aim perhaps? But when company is coming over I make sure to clean it AGAIN. Well My mom was supposed to come, so I'm all excited since I haven't seen her in ages and shes supposed to bring the poodles over and I clean, and put Mikeys little Tommy outfit on him and stuff, and just wait and wait..and I'm still waiting at 9:00, when she said she'd be here at 1:00 at the latest.
So my Grandma calls me at 9:00 to tell me that she(my mom) had to paint or some shit and couldn't make it over. Of course my m om couldn't call me herself because my dad hates me and we aren't supposed to talk. So we really don't, because she'd rather chose a guy that calls her every name in the book and hits her than her daughter.
I'm so sick of getting my hopes up and being so happy that shes going to come see me and having them crash down. i mean Mikey is over a year old and shes only seen him like 5 times. And she lives less than 20 minutes away. I wish I had a real mom, and it sucks that I don't. I just feel so hurt and I'm freaking crying over this, and it pisses me off, because I always say I'm not going to cry anymore and then I do. I just feel so jealous of all those people that have these wonderful caring moms that they take for granted, and I've never had that, even Matt, he can just call his Mom anytime, like he did today, and I'm just sitting there thinking "God, why don't I have that?"
Ok, I'm sick of bitching and crying so I'm going to go-do something I guess..hopefully get rid of this horrible headache.
I cleaned my house today , like pretty well, scrubbed the floors, dusted, vaccummed, even cleaned my toilet. I know you all are like "you don't do that regularly". Well yes I do, at least once a week, because I hate nasty smelling toilets, and it seems that when you live with guys the toilet always smells nasty. Bad aim perhaps? But when company is coming over I make sure to clean it AGAIN. Well My mom was supposed to come, so I'm all excited since I haven't seen her in ages and shes supposed to bring the poodles over and I clean, and put Mikeys little Tommy outfit on him and stuff, and just wait and wait..and I'm still waiting at 9:00, when she said she'd be here at 1:00 at the latest.
So my Grandma calls me at 9:00 to tell me that she(my mom) had to paint or some shit and couldn't make it over. Of course my m om couldn't call me herself because my dad hates me and we aren't supposed to talk. So we really don't, because she'd rather chose a guy that calls her every name in the book and hits her than her daughter.
I'm so sick of getting my hopes up and being so happy that shes going to come see me and having them crash down. i mean Mikey is over a year old and shes only seen him like 5 times. And she lives less than 20 minutes away. I wish I had a real mom, and it sucks that I don't. I just feel so hurt and I'm freaking crying over this, and it pisses me off, because I always say I'm not going to cry anymore and then I do. I just feel so jealous of all those people that have these wonderful caring moms that they take for granted, and I've never had that, even Matt, he can just call his Mom anytime, like he did today, and I'm just sitting there thinking "God, why don't I have that?"
Ok, I'm sick of bitching and crying so I'm going to go-do something I guess..hopefully get rid of this horrible headache.