The Letter
A few people asked about the letter I gave to my cousin in lieu of a gift that was on backorder. Since so many people liked it, here it is in its entirety:
Dearest Master Saylors,
You may be wondering why there is a paltry sum of only $10 in this envelope. I have an
explanation for this most meager of monetary tender.
You see, as I was trying in earnest to find a most splendid and thoughtful gift for you, the
person for whose name I drew for this year’s gift exchange, I did have some trouble. Do
not despair, sir, for I did find the most exquisite of gifts to convey to you during this
Christmastide season. However, as I attempted to procure this gift, the shopkeeper
notified me that this particular item had been in the greatest of demand and hence, his
stock was completely diminished. He explained that the best he could do was send word
by way of electronic mail when his next consignment of goods arrived and ship me this
gift of the utmost quality by professional courier. I was downright dejected to say the
least, but being that this was a man of repute, I took him at his word and made
arrangements to have this gift delivered directly to your domicile forthwith.
Now as to the bill of credit contained in the parcel accompanying this communiqué,
consider it only as a down payment and a way of showing my most sincere apologies for
the tardiness of my gift.
Most very truly yours,
Sir Nathan Alan Stine, 5th Duke of Northland
Dearest Master Saylors,
You may be wondering why there is a paltry sum of only $10 in this envelope. I have an
explanation for this most meager of monetary tender.
You see, as I was trying in earnest to find a most splendid and thoughtful gift for you, the
person for whose name I drew for this year’s gift exchange, I did have some trouble. Do
not despair, sir, for I did find the most exquisite of gifts to convey to you during this
Christmastide season. However, as I attempted to procure this gift, the shopkeeper
notified me that this particular item had been in the greatest of demand and hence, his
stock was completely diminished. He explained that the best he could do was send word
by way of electronic mail when his next consignment of goods arrived and ship me this
gift of the utmost quality by professional courier. I was downright dejected to say the
least, but being that this was a man of repute, I took him at his word and made
arrangements to have this gift delivered directly to your domicile forthwith.
Now as to the bill of credit contained in the parcel accompanying this communiqué,
consider it only as a down payment and a way of showing my most sincere apologies for
the tardiness of my gift.
Most very truly yours,
Sir Nathan Alan Stine, 5th Duke of Northland