define: feminism
Tumblr is not LJ. Tumblr is not LJ. This is your mantra Katrina, do not forget it. Rants should not be given the opportunity to create wank via reblogging.
This down with the patriarch feminist propaganda that women, who love to slap on the big ol' Feminist logo (and subsequently confuse the fuck out of me), spout all the time makes me embarrassed to have an interest in feminism. An Andy Rutledge quote is going around tumblr that reads: "Opening the door for a lady is not optional, and will never go out of style." only to get responses like these:
Just the other day I was sitting on the bus overhearing a very loud conversation between a girl and a guy wherein the girl said her teacher was a feminist and the guy was like "Idk what does that mean?" and she said "it means she like, hates guys and stuff."
The problem is, we have failed to teach our children how to pick and choose. And yes, its hard when you're young to discriminate between the OVERLY ZEALOUS and the legitimate lines to be drawn. Its hard to explain that a balance between the two is what one strives to achieve, regardless of gender or orientation. It isnt about "condescending dominance" or weakness or even whether you can open a door on your own- hell, I'm sure you open doors like a pro! Its about kindness. Its about respect. Its about understanding that there are inherent differences between men and women and accepting these differences so you can play them to your advantage.
To that end, I find it insulting that there is such a common misconception that men have to earn their title as gentlemen and women are all just born ladies who have to stick up for themselves and "hide" behind the facade of a woman who doesnt want the door opened for her. WRONG. WRONG WRONG JFC WRONG. You have to earn that title as well. You have to cultivate interests and learn when to keep your pointy tongue in your pretty little mouth. You have to learn how to be gracious and accepting and at home in your own body. These immature knee-jerk "KEEP YOUR FUCKING DOORS TO YOURSELF" comments are just so distressing, and then people tag them as "feminist" when in fact they're just shallow solecisms that perpetuate this bastardized form of ANGRY FEMINISM- the media's favorite kind.
Maybe it's the optional word that gets everyone's knickers in a twist, but if that's the case then use your big girl eyes and edit that out. Does "Opening the door for a lady will never go out of style." not have the same sentiment behind it? Is it that you dont want anyone to hold the door for you? What about when you're sick, or your hands are full, or you're old and need a little help? Has the chauvinism worn off now that you need it to? Is it gentlemanly now that you have no ground to refute simple kindness?
I mean, I'm not saying stand outside the fucking building until some guy opens the door for you, but if he does, dont throw it back in his face. Don't make him feel bad for trying to assimilate the varied and conflicting messages regarding masculinity and his culture (which is an ENTIRELY different conversation) when all he's doing is opening a door for you. It's a nice gesture, take it at face value.
And if he pinches your butt afterwards, and you dont like it, punch him in the balls.
This down with the patriarch feminist propaganda that women, who love to slap on the big ol' Feminist logo (and subsequently confuse the fuck out of me), spout all the time makes me embarrassed to have an interest in feminism. An Andy Rutledge quote is going around tumblr that reads: "Opening the door for a lady is not optional, and will never go out of style." only to get responses like these:
- yeah, how about whoever gets to the door first can open it for the person or people behind them. that way, it’s an act of courtesy and not a misplaced gesture of condescending dominance.
- I can open my own car door. In fact, I can open any door, if unlocked. I EVEN HOLD DOORS OPEN FOR MEN. What a gentleman I am!
- -.- now i wonder is woman that weak that they cant even open the door? for goodness sake.
Just the other day I was sitting on the bus overhearing a very loud conversation between a girl and a guy wherein the girl said her teacher was a feminist and the guy was like "Idk what does that mean?" and she said "it means she like, hates guys and stuff."
The problem is, we have failed to teach our children how to pick and choose. And yes, its hard when you're young to discriminate between the OVERLY ZEALOUS and the legitimate lines to be drawn. Its hard to explain that a balance between the two is what one strives to achieve, regardless of gender or orientation. It isnt about "condescending dominance" or weakness or even whether you can open a door on your own- hell, I'm sure you open doors like a pro! Its about kindness. Its about respect. Its about understanding that there are inherent differences between men and women and accepting these differences so you can play them to your advantage.
To that end, I find it insulting that there is such a common misconception that men have to earn their title as gentlemen and women are all just born ladies who have to stick up for themselves and "hide" behind the facade of a woman who doesnt want the door opened for her. WRONG. WRONG WRONG JFC WRONG. You have to earn that title as well. You have to cultivate interests and learn when to keep your pointy tongue in your pretty little mouth. You have to learn how to be gracious and accepting and at home in your own body. These immature knee-jerk "KEEP YOUR FUCKING DOORS TO YOURSELF" comments are just so distressing, and then people tag them as "feminist" when in fact they're just shallow solecisms that perpetuate this bastardized form of ANGRY FEMINISM- the media's favorite kind.
Maybe it's the optional word that gets everyone's knickers in a twist, but if that's the case then use your big girl eyes and edit that out. Does "Opening the door for a lady will never go out of style." not have the same sentiment behind it? Is it that you dont want anyone to hold the door for you? What about when you're sick, or your hands are full, or you're old and need a little help? Has the chauvinism worn off now that you need it to? Is it gentlemanly now that you have no ground to refute simple kindness?
I mean, I'm not saying stand outside the fucking building until some guy opens the door for you, but if he does, dont throw it back in his face. Don't make him feel bad for trying to assimilate the varied and conflicting messages regarding masculinity and his culture (which is an ENTIRELY different conversation) when all he's doing is opening a door for you. It's a nice gesture, take it at face value.
And if he pinches your butt afterwards, and you dont like it, punch him in the balls.