you need light, you need grace
you were meant to let it go
supernatural pre-show gen (sam/ofc)
title from mirah's the sun
"Winchester is the name of a gun," his first girlfriend tells him.
"Winchester is the name of a gun," his first girlfriend tells him. Like he doesn't know, hasn't always known.
Her name is Soleil and her parents are part of a caravan of hippies who are staying in town for the summer. She frowns her disapproval but when Sam first met her, she was a shooting a bow and arrow at a knot in the heavy oak cedar behind the elementary school with incredible accuracy. She explains that it isn't the violence of the gun that bothers her, it's the technicality. She calls it, "distancing oneself from the consequences of violence". Sam think that Soleil might see things differently if a 300 pound werewolf came at her in the middle of the night.
For their first date, Soleil leads him to an orchard and dances through the rows of trees, sun shining in her golden hair. At sixteen, Sam is much to gangly too do anything other than follow from a few steps behind. She stops abruptly and Sam tenses. His instincts aren't as well-honed as Dad's or Dean's, but he's willing to fight for her if she needs him.
Instead, she reaches up on tiptoes to the nearest tree, trying to grab a red-green apple just out of her grasp. Her head turns and she looks at him beseechingly. This is something he can do. Sam barely has to stretch to reach the apple. The stem snaps silently as he twists it off in one smooth motion.
When he hands her the apple, their fingers brush, and a new tingling feeling travels up Sam's arm, hitting his heart on the way up. When she whips a curved blade out of who-knows-where, Sam thinks he's in love.
Soleil kisses like sunshine, which makes sense, and she winds her witchy fingers around Sam's bicep. This is something Sam could lose himself in, and he does because when he walks Soleil to her commune's van, it's nearly dark. She's so beautiful in the sunset, her smile reminding Sam of someone just at the back of his mind.
He comes in ten minutes after curfew and from the smirk on Dean's face, Sam knows he'll owe Dean one.
"I had to cover for you, dickwad," Dean hisses triumphantly, whittling a stake on his twin bed. "I want to meet her." Not likely, Sam thinks. He doesn't wonder how Dean knew. It's the sort of thing to take for granted in the Winchester family, such as it is.
On their second date, Sam convinces Soleil to come to the county fair. She doesn't appreciate "the corporate attitude toward competition" or something, but Sam wants to win her one of those stuffed cows from the ball toss anyway.
They're winding their through a thick crowd, hands entwined, when Sam sees him. He tries, stops short and attempts to circumvent disaster, but it's too late. Dean must have followed them here. Sam knows there's no way in hell Dean'd go to a county fair for fun.
"Heyyyy, Sammy," Dean smarms, drawing his y out like reeling in a fish. Soleil glances up at Sam and smiles lightly, pleased. Sam's lips quirk up in response, an automatic reaction to the brightening of her face, and Dean seems to see her for the first time.
Sam knew this was coming.
His eyes travel up and down slowly, carefully, taking her measure, and Sam braces himself for the bomb to drop, for Soleil to be ripped away from him, but. When Dean smiles, it's his clean, friendly smile. His working-a-job smile. "I'm Sammy's older brother, Dean. It's real nice to meet you."
Soleil beams back. "Nice to meet you too. Sam didn't tell me had a brother." She leans subtly against his side and Sam isn't sure whether it's in retribution or appreciation.
A flick of Dean's eyes over Sam's face and his smile closes even further. "See you tonight, Sammy," he intones, smiles briefly at Soleil, and pushes off through the crowd again.
When Sam walks Soleil back later that night, he appraises her face more carefully. She seems blurry around the edges somehow, whether from tiredness or the dusk, and her hair seems duller. He kisses her carefully and she winds her body against him. He pulls away first.
The next day, Dad is animated and focused, which means the obvious. A hunt, two states over. They're gone for five days and Sam doesn't think of Soleil until, as they're heading home-- Dean driving, Sam riding shotgun, while Dad tries to recoup, spead across the Impala's back seat-- Dean says, "I bet you'll be glad to get back to that girlfriend of yours. She seemed nice." Sam represses a shrug.
As it turns out, the caravan had moved out two days after they'd gone hunting and there is little left of Soleil, excepting some muddy tire marks in the field behind the school and a few torn branches in the apple orchard. She slips away from him easily. Sam even loses her name, to hundreds of new acquaintances, to algebraic functions and the seven functions of an uzi.
Still, years later, when Sam is kissing Jessica, something makes him think of sunshine and he twines his fingers through her hair.
supernatural pre-show gen (sam/ofc)
title from mirah's the sun
"Winchester is the name of a gun," his first girlfriend tells him.
"Winchester is the name of a gun," his first girlfriend tells him. Like he doesn't know, hasn't always known.
Her name is Soleil and her parents are part of a caravan of hippies who are staying in town for the summer. She frowns her disapproval but when Sam first met her, she was a shooting a bow and arrow at a knot in the heavy oak cedar behind the elementary school with incredible accuracy. She explains that it isn't the violence of the gun that bothers her, it's the technicality. She calls it, "distancing oneself from the consequences of violence". Sam think that Soleil might see things differently if a 300 pound werewolf came at her in the middle of the night.
For their first date, Soleil leads him to an orchard and dances through the rows of trees, sun shining in her golden hair. At sixteen, Sam is much to gangly too do anything other than follow from a few steps behind. She stops abruptly and Sam tenses. His instincts aren't as well-honed as Dad's or Dean's, but he's willing to fight for her if she needs him.
Instead, she reaches up on tiptoes to the nearest tree, trying to grab a red-green apple just out of her grasp. Her head turns and she looks at him beseechingly. This is something he can do. Sam barely has to stretch to reach the apple. The stem snaps silently as he twists it off in one smooth motion.
When he hands her the apple, their fingers brush, and a new tingling feeling travels up Sam's arm, hitting his heart on the way up. When she whips a curved blade out of who-knows-where, Sam thinks he's in love.
Soleil kisses like sunshine, which makes sense, and she winds her witchy fingers around Sam's bicep. This is something Sam could lose himself in, and he does because when he walks Soleil to her commune's van, it's nearly dark. She's so beautiful in the sunset, her smile reminding Sam of someone just at the back of his mind.
He comes in ten minutes after curfew and from the smirk on Dean's face, Sam knows he'll owe Dean one.
"I had to cover for you, dickwad," Dean hisses triumphantly, whittling a stake on his twin bed. "I want to meet her." Not likely, Sam thinks. He doesn't wonder how Dean knew. It's the sort of thing to take for granted in the Winchester family, such as it is.
On their second date, Sam convinces Soleil to come to the county fair. She doesn't appreciate "the corporate attitude toward competition" or something, but Sam wants to win her one of those stuffed cows from the ball toss anyway.
They're winding their through a thick crowd, hands entwined, when Sam sees him. He tries, stops short and attempts to circumvent disaster, but it's too late. Dean must have followed them here. Sam knows there's no way in hell Dean'd go to a county fair for fun.
"Heyyyy, Sammy," Dean smarms, drawing his y out like reeling in a fish. Soleil glances up at Sam and smiles lightly, pleased. Sam's lips quirk up in response, an automatic reaction to the brightening of her face, and Dean seems to see her for the first time.
Sam knew this was coming.
His eyes travel up and down slowly, carefully, taking her measure, and Sam braces himself for the bomb to drop, for Soleil to be ripped away from him, but. When Dean smiles, it's his clean, friendly smile. His working-a-job smile. "I'm Sammy's older brother, Dean. It's real nice to meet you."
Soleil beams back. "Nice to meet you too. Sam didn't tell me had a brother." She leans subtly against his side and Sam isn't sure whether it's in retribution or appreciation.
A flick of Dean's eyes over Sam's face and his smile closes even further. "See you tonight, Sammy," he intones, smiles briefly at Soleil, and pushes off through the crowd again.
When Sam walks Soleil back later that night, he appraises her face more carefully. She seems blurry around the edges somehow, whether from tiredness or the dusk, and her hair seems duller. He kisses her carefully and she winds her body against him. He pulls away first.
The next day, Dad is animated and focused, which means the obvious. A hunt, two states over. They're gone for five days and Sam doesn't think of Soleil until, as they're heading home-- Dean driving, Sam riding shotgun, while Dad tries to recoup, spead across the Impala's back seat-- Dean says, "I bet you'll be glad to get back to that girlfriend of yours. She seemed nice." Sam represses a shrug.
As it turns out, the caravan had moved out two days after they'd gone hunting and there is little left of Soleil, excepting some muddy tire marks in the field behind the school and a few torn branches in the apple orchard. She slips away from him easily. Sam even loses her name, to hundreds of new acquaintances, to algebraic functions and the seven functions of an uzi.
Still, years later, when Sam is kissing Jessica, something makes him think of sunshine and he twines his fingers through her hair.