Oct 19, 2004 01:49
so this weekend I was a FUCKIN FATASS PIG! i dont even want to talk about it... im so disgusted and ashamed at myself for letting myself give in... ugh... thats why i hate the weekends so much
so i said to myself, i will start a new this week and fast as much as i can. and so far i have done very well. i only had some gatorade today (about 10 ounces or so) and some tea when i got to work. i didnt walk to work today though because its getting colder and ive been feeling really tired the past couple of days. like yesterday, i took two naps that were like 2 hours each. and this morning i slept til about 12noon and then feel back asleep from 1:15 to about 2:30pm. i know that the weekends kill me with waking up early, but i still dont know why im so tired lately.
oh well - at least when im sleeping, im not eating! thats one plus about sleeping all the time :)
i weighed myself this morning and went down a pound (THANK GOD especially since my horrid weekend binge). I HEART STACKER 2s.
trying to keep myself on track lately - been focused and confident. mainly because well i dont have much else to really work for or be focused on. i feel like this is the only thing in my life right now that i have control over. my jobs in limbo, and well i dont have anything else goin on in my life. sad isnt it. i guess its better since i can pay more attention to my weight and my goals. ive been referring to books i have to give myself some inspiration and guidance and have had some outlook from others too. i just wish i could not eat ever again-- why cant that be as simple as it sounds?? i want to lose and lose and lose... i wish...