(no subject)
there are times when you get suckered in,
to drugs and alcohol and sex with women, mmmkay.
thats it...thats all i got.
i feel rather empty right now...food empty that is. i've noticed that i've been really cutting back when it comes to my consumption function. no reason really. i think christmas got the best of me.
i really do want it to snow REAL good for the next few months. these dry winters have been cutting back on my time to snowboard. its depressing really. its been good times from the last two times that i went. its a good way for a bunch of friends to come together and fall with each other. good times. good times.
IF IT'S ANYTHING YOU READ IN THIS POST, READ THIS:
just when your beliefs begin to slip your grasp, theres always something that picks it right back up again. patronize me if you must, but i'm sure of it that my relationship with the G-man upstairs is growing very rapidly. he does exist, and i have felt his presence. i'm sure some or most people may get a good chuckle after seeing this, but no one, aside from my roomate adam, has felt or experienced what i have experienced. he is here, and he is testing us.
"what happend to me?" some fo you may ask. nothing really, i'm still me. i still burn, i still drink, i still have sex, i still listen to the music i choose to listen to, i still swear, i still play music others feel uncomfortable with. but the one thing that has changed, is my faith level, and boy is it ever high.
we ARE all still young to fully understand god. there is absolutely nothing wrong with questioning his presence. some people DO underestimate his power. he is no magician, hes a listener and a giver.
i have gone through times where i thought that 'this is what i'm supposed to do' and it doesn't happen the way you thought it would, like liking or loving a person, but getting anything in return. you know, your heart is pure, but heart lies to you. your feelings lie to you. its not god that's making you feel emotions about these things, its YOU making YOU feel emotions about these things.
if these things dont last, they were never meant to be, and if they do, you're in the right path.
...think about it