(no subject)
It seems as if I really only post anything when I have a completly stupid story to tell. SUPRISE!I have a completly stupid story to tell. I'll start this one right in the begining. OVer the summer a plan was devised between all my roomates to make a trip to a baseball game. Clearly there are two teams very close by that we could have gone to but that's no fun so we decided on Boston. After trying and failing to get nine tickets there we decided that Baltimore was our next best bet. People were called, tickets were bought, and we were excited about the whole thing. As the date drew closer the plan filled out and it came down to this: Two cars, nine kids, a grill, lots of booze, baseball and the cheepest hotel we can find for the night. As I know, that is one of the best plans ever. Anyway the game was this past Saturday and what follows are the horrific events that unfolded leading to the death of a car and the stranding of two dear friends somewhere in Maryland. We woke up Saturday morning absolutly pumped out of our minds. It was ten in the morning and we were so loud that I am sure we were heard throughout the entire floor full of hung over people. Brunch was obtained, heart disease came one step closer, and we were ready to go. In one car was Tom, Brendan, Andrew, and Chris while in the other was myself, Mike, T.J., Rob, and Guy. The car I was in was loaded up with all those people plus a half stack so Mike starts talking about how sluggish the car is feeling and how he isn't used to so much weight being in it. I though that was kind of weird and that less than a thousand extra pounds shouldn't matter too much but what the hell did I care. We hit road soon found ourselves in hell, or New Jersey, its unclear which exactly we drove though. With a rest stop and great tunes we made our way right through hell/Jersey towards Deleware. A side note here, there is a section of I-95 in New Jersey that consistently smells like Barbq sauce and no one knows why. I don't know what conclusions to draw from this but it is one of the strangest things in the world. The Deleware Bridge was crossed in entrily undramatic fashion and before we knew it Deleware was behind us. At this point it was decided that we must race the other car even though they had the GPS and we really didn't know very much about where we were going. This "sluggish" tried its very hardest to accelerate but could only do so on flats and down hills. Infact we lost speed the the petal to the metal on the up hills. Clearly this means something is wrong. However, Mike wasn't worried and its his car so I wasn't either. It was then we came to a serious hill, possibly a mile long gradual climb. We hit it at 90 and crested it at 60 at which point the car crapped out. The second car which had passed us was long gone and we were stuck on the side of 95 in Maryland. We looked for obivous things like over heating, coolent leak, and finially oil. As it turns out, oil is a pretty important part of a working car without it you kill the car. We had no oil what-so-ever in the car. The second car looped around and eventually pulled up behind us. Amazingly enough, Tom happened to be carrying a quart of extra oil in his car. After pouring that sucker in we managed to get the car over to the rest stop 200 meter up on the left. Not wanting to take any chances, we bought another quart of oil and asked the mechanic there if he thought filling up the oil would put us back on the road. This clearly brilliant guy stands infront of the running car for .376 seconds and decides that he is certin that everything is perfectly ok. Being fairly stupid ourselves i supposed we believed him, got back in the cars, and on to the highway. At this point we were deffinatly going to make the game and still have time to grill in the parking lot. Everything was great....for 400 meters after which the engine blew itself up and the car locked up, the emergency brake was used and we stopped once more on the side of 95 in Maryland. About thirty seconds of inspection was all it took us to discover that there was a giant hole in the bottom of the engine and all the oil we had just put in was on the highway behind and under the car. Again, Tom's car was infront of us so they had to circle around again and decide what to do next. Mike's roadside assitance service was called and after half an hour they decided to cover a tow truck if it ever came. In the mean time, I played catch with Brendan on the median of the highway (which I will never do again) and we all signed our names on the guard rail with the date and a diagram I drew demonstrating us crying as the car leaked oil. Eventually a tow truck was on its way, which was supposed to arrive "within the hour" and we decided the new plan was to pile seven people in Tom's car (which really only seats 4 or 5 if you really squish) and leave Mike and T.J. with the car becase there was no sense in everyone missing the game. After the game were to drop everyone off at a hotel then go back for mike, T.J., and the stuff in mike's car. By the time the seven of us were in Tom's car we were beat and in desperate need of some cheering up. Brendan really came through in the clutch and put on "Here Comes the Sun". That shit always does the trick and we were once angain excited about the trip. We got to the game only one inning in and had a good time watching two teams we don't care about at all. Finial score: Boston 5, Baltimore 11. In the 8th inning I got a text from T.J. which read "The tow truck finally got here." It had been well over two hours since we had left them there. They got screwed. The game finished so as quickly as possible he had to find a hotel and get back to Mike. Since Baltimore likes to pretend it is a real city kind of like Hartford, the holtels like the charge city rates (260$ for one room). We were not prepared to pay that much so we headed north towards Mike ans eventually found a Super 8 for 65$ a room. At 11:30 Tom and I left the hotel to go back to our favorite rest stop to bring Mike and T.J. back to the hotel. Mike's car was dead so we gutted it and left it in Maryland. Back at the hotel none of us had eaten since brunch that morning so we went to a Waffle House, eat food that might have been gross but shit man I was hungry. At 2 am we left to walk back and decided to take a detour through a graveyard when we were busted by the cops. The guy drives down the walkway and rolls down the window right next to me, "You guys hanging out in a graveyard at 2 in the morning?" Being tired and still hungry I didn't think of something funny or witty to say I just said " Yeah, we're kind of lost, we are trying to walk back to our hotel." He asked us where we were staying and we all pointed directly to the hotel and said in unison "The Super 8 right over there." Apparently that absolute foolishness satisfied him and he left. That enduced about ten mins of laughing. We evenually got back to the room at 3 or so. At that point we decided it was necessary to drink all the beer we brought, which I think was 40ish. I stayed up until 4 or 5 then fell asleep. I think some of us never went to sleep. Now some quick math: 9 kids + a car which when packed very uncomfortably fits 7 and now has to carry a half stack as well = no solution. Four of us had to get home without a car. We decided the best way to go was by bus from Deleware. At 9 Rob, Mike, T.J., Tom, and myself went back to Baltimore where Tom left us and we waited for a bus. We waited until 12:20 before we were allowed on. The guy driving the bus sucked. Just a crappy person. We stopped for gas which for some reason took half an hour. The rest of the bus ride was uneventfull, just traffic. After getting to the port authority we made our way to the 1 and got back to Manhattan at 6:15. WOW, I just got tired writing all that. I am going to take a nap right after I tell the moral of the story: Don't drive your car in Maryland, it might blow up.