(no subject)
I jsut finished studying for chem. well let me tell you, it was quite the experience. you see i was dilgently pounding away at the material i needed to covered for said final when the craziest thing happened. That's right, fucking aliens. now i haven't had many run ins with aliens as of late for i have been concerned with all the hubub concerening invasion and such. you know there is a real concern out there that those martians are out there to take over this world. but seriously this is aMerica with a capitol m we don't fuck around im not worried. even still I avoid them usually. today however i was studying in my room when one of those crazy teen aged alien decides to hover in his space ship out side of my window. at first i took my mom's advice and jsut ignoored him. "if you don't give me attention he'll just go away" is what she always said so i tried that. surprisingly that failed horrible, instead of leaving he decided to jump through the window into my room!!! how rude right? so now im like oh fuck no bitch you gots to the the fuck outa here. cus they respond to language like that....usually. again i found a hole in common alien stereotypes for this alien was deaf. so im like shit man what do i do??? with no real options (pyhsically removing an alien results in dismemberment) i offered him some iced tea, you know to make peace. this seemingly friendly alien seemed quite happy to recieve some iced tea and gulped it down. we then stood there awkwardly for a few moments, you know, he's deaf and an alien, there isn't mch to talk about, when he suddenly EXPLODES!!!!! and im like holy shit! that sucks (it turns out aliens are violently alergic to iced tea) the reason for my alarm is that these alien mother fuckers can tell when one of their own dies so they would certinly be commign to investigate. having this guy's or gal's i duno, guts coating the walls was deff gogint o lead them to believe that i killed this dude. so i got the hell outa here and went downtown, where sarah and i visited my dad and had a lovely time eating lunch with him. upon returning to my place of residence i found nothing at all misplaced except for one thing...the walls were clean and a note sitting on my desk. it read "Sorry for the mess, we didn't like him either." as it turns out the alien was dick cheney's sister-in-law. -the end