Like Lara Im going to respond to parts individually (it was such a good idea)
I'm able to write more when it's early and i should be sleeping. I know what you mean, I stay up late and when no one is around/sleeping I suddenly have this urge to write and write. I am having serious trouble concentrating on my school work. Me too-You’re not alone on that one, I think this semester for everyone is going to be the most difficult in concentration and workload. I don’t have a roommate right now and I still find myself getting distracted. I hate that school is 3 hours from home, especially since c-town is a bare bones "city," i miss my family a bunch, there's so much more i'd rather be doing at home than sitting in my dormroom playing computer games. I’m with you there too - Iowa City has stuff to do, but it’s mostly drinking or something. I sit in front of my computer much too much instead of doing things like studying, or reading.
Every little thing is pissing me off; some girl in my art history class was chomping on cheerios and i wanted to throw the bag of cereal across the room, and this one girl in my sociology class has her hair in a pony everyday but purposely leaves a few strands out so she can obsessively twirl it the entire class period which, in turn, make me want to walk up to her desk and punch her in the goddamn face. I FEEL THE SAME WAY. I have a hair twirler in one of my lectures, and pretty much anyone that chews gum with their mouth open bothers the crap out of me.
It pisses me off that i put more enthusiasm, encouragement, and input into my friends' artwork than i ever have into mine. I never get honest or an equal sum of feedback from them either. I'm sick of not feeling confident in my art and myself. I'm sick of trying to help other people figure themselves out when i'm feeling lost myself, and i hate that i feel i need to help others before i can help myself; i never get to me. Lara was right here too, it’s because you are such a good friend, I know that sometimes it’s a really kick in the pants when you don’t get the same kind of attention back, but just know that your actions towards them project such a wonderful personality.
I'm trying to understand why i still have never been on a fucking date. I'm trying to figure out why i can't totally be myself around guys. Do i really come off as awkward towards guys as i think i do? You don’t come off awkward at all, you come off as yourself, meaning you’re still the same funny, smart, and plain brilliant girl regardless of the sex/gender of the audience. I know that there are loads of guys out there that would kill for the qualities you possess.
I'm tired of being nice and mean at the same time; don't they call that two-faced? I'm fed up with needing encouragement and praise to keep going. I don't understand why i get good advice and then not take it. All of those are genuinely human qualities. Everyone needs encouragement and recognition, and to me you’re the best damn artist I know, really. I’m blown away by your projects and envy (I know the green eyed monster) your work.
I hope you know you’re one of my bestest/closest friends in the whole wide world, without you I seriously think I would have to crawl into a hole.
I'm able to write more when it's early and i should be sleeping.
I know what you mean, I stay up late and when no one is around/sleeping I suddenly have this urge to write and write.
I am having serious trouble concentrating on my school work.
Me too-You’re not alone on that one, I think this semester for everyone is going to be the most difficult in concentration and workload. I don’t have a roommate right now and I still find myself getting distracted.
I hate that school is 3 hours from home, especially since c-town is a bare bones "city," i miss my family a bunch, there's so much more i'd rather be doing at home than sitting in my dormroom playing computer games.
I’m with you there too - Iowa City has stuff to do, but it’s mostly drinking or something. I sit in front of my computer much too much instead of doing things like studying, or reading.
Every little thing is pissing me off; some girl in my art history class was chomping on cheerios and i wanted to throw the bag of cereal across the room, and this one girl in my sociology class has her hair in a pony everyday but purposely leaves a few strands out so she can obsessively twirl it the entire class period which, in turn, make me want to walk up to her desk and punch her in the goddamn face.
I FEEL THE SAME WAY. I have a hair twirler in one of my lectures, and pretty much anyone that chews gum with their mouth open bothers the crap out of me.
It pisses me off that i put more enthusiasm, encouragement, and input into my friends' artwork than i ever have into mine. I never get honest or an equal sum of feedback from them either.
I'm sick of not feeling confident in my art and myself. I'm sick of trying to help other people figure themselves out when i'm feeling lost myself, and i hate that i feel i need to help others before i can help myself; i never get to me.
Lara was right here too, it’s because you are such a good friend, I know that sometimes it’s a really kick in the pants when you don’t get the same kind of attention back, but just know that your actions towards them project such a wonderful personality.
I'm trying to understand why i still have never been on a fucking date. I'm trying to figure out why i can't totally be myself around guys. Do i really come off as awkward towards guys as i think i do?
You don’t come off awkward at all, you come off as yourself, meaning you’re still the same funny, smart, and plain brilliant girl regardless of the sex/gender of the audience. I know that there are loads of guys out there that would kill for the qualities you possess.
I'm tired of being nice and mean at the same time; don't they call that two-faced?
I'm fed up with needing encouragement and praise to keep going.
I don't understand why i get good advice and then not take it.
All of those are genuinely human qualities. Everyone needs encouragement and recognition, and to me you’re the best damn artist I know, really. I’m blown away by your projects and envy (I know the green eyed monster) your work.
I hope you know you’re one of my bestest/closest friends in the whole wide world, without you I seriously think I would have to crawl into a hole.
I miss you, and I <3 you.
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