(no subject)

[stereo_xero]

Last night was intresting. My dad tells me he's getting me drunk. And so we did. He got me pretty damn drunk. If I said anything stupid or weird to anyone on MSN last night, my apologies. Actually I told someone I had a crush on them last night, and now that I think about it, I do... which makes this situation Im in with Karrah really akward, as if it wasnt akward enough. Maybe its just because this one person has offered me many many kind words and has boosted my spirit alot during this last week. I have like buckets in common with her. It's a really nice feeling to know that I'm moving on from Karrah, but at the same time, I feel like there are things that need to be fixed between us. I want you to be happy Karrah, I'm pretty sure I know of someone who does make you happy, so go be with him. I can't stress how I didn't use you enough. If that was the case, why would coming to my aunts on christmas be a big deal? Why would meeting my family be a big deal? Why would you coming to the airport with my dad mean the world to me? I will admit I have taken advantage of your generosity, things like you asking me if I want to get food with you, you offering to pay for things etc. I shouldn't have taken as much as I did, but it was never one of the factors of why I was with you. You were always offering, and I guess I kind of got used to it. It was never my intention to be with you for these things. If you really think it is, then I will even pay you back the money on all the presents youve ever bought me. Why would I have been upset about the money you put into my sleeve? Im not saying any of this because I want you back, Im saying it because I don't like seeing you hurt, and much like you said you did about me, I still care for you as a friend. I understand you don't want to see me right now, its easier to get one feeling straight if you dont have to deal with the other. But there are some things we need to talk about, theres things I need to know, and Im sure theres things you need to know too. Lets put aside all this emotional wreck and just talk about it as friends.

I guess Im trying to say, let's give eachother our hearts back so we can work on mending them.