(no subject)
i'm still waiting to feel like i'm part of something.
to feel like i fit somewhere.
i'm starting to think that maybe that will never happen.
i'm almost 25.
if i was gonna fit in somewhere it would've happened already.
but i can't change who i am.
i would if i could.
i've tried for years.
i try my very best to be a likable person.
my brain is a few years behind most people my age.
and sometimes i get carried away.
my childhood really fucked me up.
and sometimes i think i'm ok.
then something happens and notice i react differently than other people would.
and sometimes it may seem like i want a bunch of attention.
but i don't want a ton of people looking at me.
i wanna feel like i matter.
i don't wanna feel tolerated.
i should probly go back to my shrink.
to feel like i fit somewhere.
i'm starting to think that maybe that will never happen.
i'm almost 25.
if i was gonna fit in somewhere it would've happened already.
but i can't change who i am.
i would if i could.
i've tried for years.
i try my very best to be a likable person.
my brain is a few years behind most people my age.
and sometimes i get carried away.
my childhood really fucked me up.
and sometimes i think i'm ok.
then something happens and notice i react differently than other people would.
and sometimes it may seem like i want a bunch of attention.
but i don't want a ton of people looking at me.
i wanna feel like i matter.
i don't wanna feel tolerated.
i should probly go back to my shrink.