hi ho, hi ho... that's it. 0_o
Discovery's of the day:
1. Talking to an ex helps you remember why they're an ex. lol jk
I dont think i have an ex that i dont really love.. i love all my ex's.. i mean i dated their asses for a reason.. I can name a few i'd hope i never see again, so maybe that's a lie and a half..
*thinks about it*
No, ya all my ex's are crazy.. i think the only sain one is tabitha/trevor.. probably cause she's a boy now, so she's kinda like my ex boyfriend.. which then brings me back to my years old question, maybe i'm just a hetero trapped in a lesbo's body?..eh.
2. A while back i found out my current gf has been flirting with her 500 lb ex gf.. which in turn makes me feel very unattractive.. Don't get me wrong.. i have no problem with fat people..i love all people.. i just dont love fat people that dont know when to back the fuck off.. so its not the fat that makes you ugly.. but, never the less.. its ruined our relationship for the long haul..sadly i dont see it ever getting better.. how we're still together is beyond me.. i love her, but im just more tired and in a zombie state of mind.. i dont really care.. and i'm even saying all this in a public post, so what's that say about my current mental health..
After reading some of my old posts, i realize the older we get, the more we hide.. the more we act like everythings ok.. cause i'm sorry, i know i'm not the only one with issues, but the friends and family i see through my eyes, they all have it figured out? Dont think so homey, i can't be the only outcast.
conclusion: the world is fuckin nuts.. at 30 i'm finally realizing there will never be a white picket fence, no babies of love, fireworks when you look at someone across the room? What fireworks?..fireworks come at a price.. the price of them not loving you as much as you love them.. 1 sided fireworks.. and if they ever are 2 sided.. they dont last.. 'the notebook'? a movie to make us think that we have 1 life long partner that we can't live without.. bull- to- the- shit.. it dont happen that way... was it sad at the end when she didn't remember the 'love of her life'? no..no and for obvious reasons if your a human being.
And THAT is why i'm a songwriter.. i see the real in shit..i put it in a song.. that you all love because every lyric you can relate to. but if i just speak my mind in a rant, i look like a crazy person..
I thought i'd have all this shit figured out by 30.. a wife, a kid.. the only thing i have at 30 is the realization that all you have to do is appear happy.. whether you are or not is irrelevant.
1. Talking to an ex helps you remember why they're an ex. lol jk
I dont think i have an ex that i dont really love.. i love all my ex's.. i mean i dated their asses for a reason.. I can name a few i'd hope i never see again, so maybe that's a lie and a half..
*thinks about it*
No, ya all my ex's are crazy.. i think the only sain one is tabitha/trevor.. probably cause she's a boy now, so she's kinda like my ex boyfriend.. which then brings me back to my years old question, maybe i'm just a hetero trapped in a lesbo's body?..eh.
2. A while back i found out my current gf has been flirting with her 500 lb ex gf.. which in turn makes me feel very unattractive.. Don't get me wrong.. i have no problem with fat people..i love all people.. i just dont love fat people that dont know when to back the fuck off.. so its not the fat that makes you ugly.. but, never the less.. its ruined our relationship for the long haul..sadly i dont see it ever getting better.. how we're still together is beyond me.. i love her, but im just more tired and in a zombie state of mind.. i dont really care.. and i'm even saying all this in a public post, so what's that say about my current mental health..
After reading some of my old posts, i realize the older we get, the more we hide.. the more we act like everythings ok.. cause i'm sorry, i know i'm not the only one with issues, but the friends and family i see through my eyes, they all have it figured out? Dont think so homey, i can't be the only outcast.
conclusion: the world is fuckin nuts.. at 30 i'm finally realizing there will never be a white picket fence, no babies of love, fireworks when you look at someone across the room? What fireworks?..fireworks come at a price.. the price of them not loving you as much as you love them.. 1 sided fireworks.. and if they ever are 2 sided.. they dont last.. 'the notebook'? a movie to make us think that we have 1 life long partner that we can't live without.. bull- to- the- shit.. it dont happen that way... was it sad at the end when she didn't remember the 'love of her life'? no..no and for obvious reasons if your a human being.
And THAT is why i'm a songwriter.. i see the real in shit..i put it in a song.. that you all love because every lyric you can relate to. but if i just speak my mind in a rant, i look like a crazy person..
I thought i'd have all this shit figured out by 30.. a wife, a kid.. the only thing i have at 30 is the realization that all you have to do is appear happy.. whether you are or not is irrelevant.